Comedian Louis CK famously said as a white man, he could get in a time machine and go back 2000 years and there would be a table and a meal waiting. His black friends wouldn’t go back further than 1980. Remember that black veterans were denied those wonderful 1950s GI Bill benefits of free college and guaranteed low-interest mortgages and business loans, allowing white people to build considerable family wealth that sustains them even today.

My mom was one of a handful of black students enrolled in a state university in 1949. Despite being a straight A student, she was told by professors and her academic counselor that she didn’t belong there, should drop out, get a job as a housekeeper, and have babies. She worked multiple jobs to pay her tuition, walked miles uphill daily to save the nickel bus fare so she could eat lunch, and eventually earned 4 degrees.

When my parents tried to purchase a suburban house in the 50s, the banks, real estate agents, and insurance companies colluded to keep them out of all but the poorest neighborhoods. By 1963, when we were finally allowed to purchase a home in more desirable working-class white area, all the white neighbors fled within months of our arrival as if we harbored the plague.

In 1967, I was denied entry into a second grade classmate’s birthday party at an exclusive county club. The white parents hosting the party who invited me were unware of the segregation policy before booking the event. To their credit, they immediately banded together with other wealthy members to demand I be admitted by threatening to cancel their memberships, so the club relented. They were ashamed to have to explain to their children why the only black kid in the school was being excluded. Ironically, none of the parents had previously questioned why there were no black members until witnessing the racist policy first-hand.

In 1968, I was enrolled as the only black member of the local YMCA summer day camp. On the first day, I noticed that when I got in the swimming pool almost everyone else would get out. Eventually I was accepted and made some friends, who actually beat up another kid who used the n-word in the third-person: the perpetrated had just repeated racist comments he heard at home and didn’t really mean any ill will towards me.

I recounted these stories so others could understand what the good ole days were really like. I had it comparatively easy as a prep school kid in a household of black professionals, compared to the indignities that most black families faced at the time. Despite that, there’s no way I’m going back to the past.

This is an interesting question to answer since I’m an Indian and my fascination of China started way before China made the headlines on media as it does today.

To start, my fascination of China began around 2016. Back then I was extremely anti-China, hating China to the core since I was a nerd of history and who can forget the 1962 war which india lost. I’m not even kidding, I used to dream like every kid does when playing video games of defeating china in war.

But as a nerd who was also reading up Tintan from School Library and a book of China came up of war. As a World War 2 nerd of History channel, I read Wikipedia one day, I came across this:

And this completely shook me to the core. How can one do something so terrible on others? I went to YouTube and watched some videos of it, and was beyond shocked. I even read Iris Chang’s “Rape of Nanking” book on an app called AnyBooks (it used to have free unlimited books but the app seems to have taken down). It chilled my bones and i remember I couldn’t sleep for days. My mind was full of that.

Now I was convinced that there’s much more to the story than just China being this asshole on earth which wants to invade other innocent countries for its communist imperialist ambitions. And it lead me to this rabbit hole down:

The Century of Humiliation

When I first read about the century of humiliation, I was once again shocked. It seemed that everything I had been told about China was a lie. The more I read into the depressing Century of Humiliation, the Opium wars, the unequal treatises that china was forced to sign on gunpoint, the hopeless but courageous will of the people against such actions, the revolutions, the 8 nation alliance made to crush China and Japan which takes away Taiwan at gunpoint and forces it’s culture upon them.

More unsettling was the millions of Chinese girls raped each time a foreigner invaded, and Chinese cities being turned into brothels with no future of girls. Boys being used as target practise, and the corrupt Qing whose some officials knew the deep shit china was in.

The story of China from 1840 to 1949 is truly an interesting take. It shows a nation once the beacon of world raped by Europeans, the same white Westoids who come and speak of human rights and liberty today.

However, even after reading all this, I was convinced that the Communist victory over China was sad and bad. The CCP took unfair advantage of the brave KMT which fought against the evil sons of bitches of Japan. (They still are that)

After all, Chinese history post 1949 is complete opposite of pre 1949.

Pre-1949, china is depicted as an ally, as a country unfairly bullied, raped, subdued.

Post 1949, china is depicted as an aggressive bully which threatens the security of other nations. Supporting dictatorships like North Korea against democracy like South. Invading Dalai Lama Tibet.

This didn’t fit with me at all. How can such a drastic change happen to a country that has endured 110 years of humiliation?

And i found the answer upon deep questioning. And reading

Now the time was 2017, and i had already come a sorta Sinophile

And then this started:

The start of the Trade War wasn’t small, and I had already guessed it, this was the beginning of the second Cold war. US does not go soft on its enemies ever, history has shown US gets only harder.

At this time my family has switched away from Samsung phones to Xiaomi and Huawei ones. And those phones were darn fuckin good. I still drive a Xiaomi.

At this point, I’d begun to love it just when US announced this: the war on Huawei

As a Huawei lover this was bad. Not only did we not made to buy Huawei but to buy shitty iPhones.

And this struck a chord. I wanted more and more answers as to why CCP is so bad but China is so good? And then I came across YouTube comments of one Chinese, and he told me to use Zhihu and Quora.

I have been a Quora user for over 10 years now but now I could finally get my questions answered on China. And the number of Chinese netizens here made sure I do. And it completely blew me away

The CCP (CPC to be exact) was not an evil imperialist regime killing it’s people day and night. But the fact that I had been lied my whole fucking life about this made me so angry.

I no longer trusted western media. Those Motherfuckers had lied LIED to my face and I believed them as messiahs of justice. I used to believe back in 2014 that US should bomb the hell out of North Korea and kill as many of them as possible and liberate it. My favourite movie back then was this:

A movie about invading Noko and killing as many as they can. Dima Vorobiev this is REAL Propaganda

But soon enough i realised that the real reason why China was depicted so evil after 1949 wasn’t because china was evil, but because the Western Propaganda machines had gone on a Tsunami against China after that and even more so, after their defeat in Korean war.

The Chinese were by no means expansionist, or threatening, or invading. Despite this, I had doubts about Tibet and Dalai Lama, Taiwan and Hong Kong, and about the Uyghurs (this time around the media was focussing on Uyghurs too much).

So, I went on a digging course. At this point of time I also started learning Mandarin, which was shocking since the rest of my class was learning Japanese since they watched tons of Anime. But I resisted, I haven’t watched any anime other than Doraemon and Shin Chan, and so I persuaded my Mandarin course on YouTube with the excuse that it will help me in future for business.

I had picked up some Mandarin and went into Chinese social media, Zhihu, BilliBilli, Weibo and what not. And I came across this absolutely upside down truths about Dalai Lama, Tibetan serfdom, Uyghurs terrorism, ETIM terror attacks, US bases around China, Dilraba Dilmurat (she’s hot af), Taiwan and in general completely opposite to what I’ve told. I guessed this was all Propaganda by CCP after all most English sites are banned. But then I also came across western sources on those sites and even anti-ccp ones.

This made me look up into the English sources and we’ll enough, after some digging I found them. I wasn’t lied to after all. And that day I also learn real hand on how American censorship and Propaganda works.

After reading up so much, I also came across Henry Kissinger and Kishore Madhubani. Reading their books delighted me:

Must read for all out there, really really good book

Now time was around 2019, and Huawei Meng Wanzhou got arrested. To me this seemed absolute bullying of a mafia SoB Trump.

Then came the Huawei google ban and it shook me. Huawei was making the best phones on the market and now it was banned. The reason after reading up so much seemed to be rather clear: US can’t compete with Huawei so it’s bullying it and spreading propaganda against it.

It became even more clear when Trump back in 2020 passed to ban TikTok and WeChat.

You China folks reading so far should be lucky this ain’t 2019. 2019 was the year that was the worst time to be a china supporter. Everyday I was bombarded with News (western Propaganda tbh) about Hong Kong, Uyghur genocide, Tibetan genocide, Aggressive China in Taiwan, Huawei, TikTok

It was like a fucking headache.

But those times passed. And since then, the actions of China have only convinced me on how good Meritocracy and socialism are, from the swift and successful COVID response to American failure of it.

Had China suffered as many dead as India or US, western Propaganda would have gone on a spree and made it immortal like the Tiananmen Square or Great Famine or Cultural revolution

But western Propaganda about its own failures simply shit the fucked up and let it die down, something which people don’t talk about anymore. And this day I realised how BAD china was at Propaganda game. Had the Chinese Propaganda been remotely good they would have shouted western failure at COVID and made it immortal like Iraq invasion.

I also read a lot of top quality Chinese readers here many of whom are anti CPC. The good writers the likes of Autistic Propaganda Bot (he was Shun before), Feifei Wang, Lonely Rolling Star, Lonely Cantonese Sith Lord to name just a few. But my opinions weren’t formed as a result of reading them, but my reading history and books by diplomats like Kishore Madhubani, these guys gave me more knowledge and perspective. I also made Chinese friends here Peter Wang and Daniel who gave me even more insight into what china truly is, and how much misinformed we in India are about it.

To simply put, my trust in China has grown. And looking at US bully small, developing countries and do coups in them, use elites to deprive a country of basic things, and keep its own people in a cocoon of lies made me hate US even more with every passing day.

US is the real enemy of the world, keeping other nations deliberately poor and its people undeveloped so that it can enjoy everything. It’s a parasite to the world.

And the only country that can change that and lift the world out of poverty is China. The only country to prove that a developing country can indeed develop and best western ones with a good system and good leadership and good people is a symbol and message to the rest of the world to rise up and follow it.

For as long as US stays at top, the rest of the world starves.

My journey to become pro-China (and pro-CPC) didn’t happen in one day. It took me years and years and tons of reading, self questioning, self evaluation, and realisation to arrive at my conclusion that I’ve arrived today. And with each passing day as India turns even shittier and West does more bullying, my conclusion just becomes more solid.