Well guys, I have been working on an ESL version of the Sir Whiskerton stories. Now, I initially generated them as a means and as a way to convert some of the deeper insights from the DM into a fun and easy format. Many of you probably think that the writings are just kind of silly and simple.
Well, that is the intention.
But there’s deeper stuff in them.
Consider today’s Sir Whiskerton story… There’s a line (which is a play on word from “The Princess Bride” (movie)…”The Crime Scene: A Slime of Unusual Size”. It’s all about snot, eh?
Humans, and all creatures interact within this reality. A reality that we created for ourselves. And within that reality are elements of feces, urine, snot and other bodily extractions that little kids talk about, adults know about, but social constraints pretty much avoid talking about. Well, farting is an exception.
We get so caught up in the social constraints are lie within the reality constraints.
And all these constraints keep us all on the same “life line” for a predestined, fated life that was pre-planned with the pre-birth world-line template.
These things limit our options and our abilities.
That is why we need to …
- Identify what constraints are limiting our advancement (per our affirmation goals).
- Then pull ourselves out of those constraints.
- Carefully monitoring ourselves so that we don’t fall into other constraints and restriction.
- Then move forward.
Look in the story…
“Chef Remy LeRaccoon bottles the slime as “Organic Snail Serum.” Doris buys six jars.”
A character turns around the situation for personal profit.
…
Now the entertainment value is one thing. And the teachings are another thing. But (as a fella living in China), the vocabulary has value. It’s all a great venue to teach English to kids.
- monologuing
- betrayal
- crescendos
Great words, but put together in memorable ways that help teach English.
Anyways, I’m working on this. Got a bunch of volumes put out already. For a Chinese audience.
FYI.
Today…
US Layoffs Hit Pandemic Levels While Wall Street Pretends All Is Fine
Worse than the “great depression” of the 1920’s.
Uh oh.
China Moving ICBM Nukes DISGUISED AS CRANES on Public Highways – Taiwan Surrounded


China’s People’s Liberation Army (PLA) announced a “snap military exercise” around Taiwan last night. As the morning sun rose, PLA-Navy vessels are surrounding that island. Nukes are also on the move!
Chinese PLA Eastern Theater Command launches “Justice Mission 2025” joint military drills around Taiwan, involving Army, Navy, Air Force, and Rocket Force units.
Taiwan’s Ministry of National Defense says 2 PLA aircraft sorties, 9 PLAN vessels, and 2 official Chinese ships were detected operating around Taiwan as of 6 a.m. (UTC+8), with ROC armed forces monitoring the situation and responding accordingly.
Elsewhere in China, the same PLA is now moving Intercontinental Ballistic Missiles armed with Nuclear Warheads. It began in the wee hours of the morning, China began moving Transporter, Erector, Launcher (TEL) trucks carrying Dong Feng (DF) nuclear missiles DISGUISED AS CRANES:


Once the sun came up, these nuclear missiles were seen on public roads . . . . and the Transporter, Erector Launcher vehicles are DISGUISED AS CRANES from Zoomlion Corporation which makes large agricultural equipment.
Below, two screen-shot images from a dashcam video showing a “DF” model nuclear ICBM traveling along a public highway inside China.


“DF” (Dong Feng or “East Wind”) series includes a variety of intercontinental ballistic missile (ICBM) systems used by China, which utilize both fixed silo-based and road-mobile transporter erector launcher (TEL) systems.
Would China disguise a military takeover of Taiwan as a “Snap Military Exercise?” If China is holding a military “exercise” why DISGUISE the movement of nuke missiles? Why try to hide them if it’s only an exercise?
IIs the movement of nuclear ICBM’s a warning to everyone else to stay away (from what China maybe is about to do) or get nuked?
It should be noted that at no time in the past, when China has performed one of their military exercises around Taiwan, did Nuclear missiles also move. Today is the first time.
For China, now is the perfect time to ‘make move on Taiwan’ as a record number of Pentagon ships has been sent to Venezuela The US cannot credibly respond to an invasion of Taiwan.
For whatever reason, have you ever had a job not pay you?
Shortly out of college I managed to get a computer programming job with a video game developer
. It felt like a dream come true. Unfortunately, this was right before the 2009 recession hit and the company was not in a position to make it through.
They blamed the collapse of a publishing company for the reason why our pay checks bounced. Then they fired the more experienced staff and then tried to cover up that they were using employee 401k money to unlawfully keep the house of cards together. They also stopped paying the health and dental insurance, but didn’t tell their employees of that fact.
I was unpaid for about a month before I left. Other people that held on to hope that things would turn around stayed longer. It eventually came out that the company president was convicted of both state and federal crimes such as tax evasion and racketeering and owed over 2 million dollars in unpaid wages to his employees. It was a big scandal.
I worked in two other video game companies before I decided that the high stress, low pay thing wasn’t good for me. I then went to graduate school which was also high stress, and low pay.
Ukraine Attacks Russia Presidential Residence

Yesterday, Ukraine launched about ninety (90) long-range “Kamikaze” Drones toward the Novgorod Region of Russia, about 250 miles northwest of Moscow.
According to Russian Foreign Affairs Assistant to the President, Yuriy Ushakov, some of the drones impacted the Official State Residence of Russia’s President, Vladimir Putin.
President Trump was informed of the attack TODAY, Monday, in an unexpected telephone call from the Russian President.
The attack took place just after Zelensky departed his meeting with US President Donald Trump at the President’s personal estate, Mar-a-Lago, in Florida.
Because the distance from Ukraine to Novgorod is about 900 miles, the drones had to have been in the air at the exact same time Zelensky was meeting with Trump. Worse, it is strongly believed that the drones themselves could not have been guided to target except through US/NATO satellites, and US/NATO-supplied target coordinates.
It is not known if Zelensky informed Trump that this attack was coming. It is also not known if anyone in the US military chain of command, or in NATO, (or Europe), informed Trump.
For his part, Trump reportedly told Putin he was “Shocked” by Ukraine doing such a “crazy actions” and reportedly said “Thank God we didn’t give them Tomahawks.”
President Putin made clear to President Trump “such reckless actions would certainly not go unanswered” and that the Americans must now understand “Moscow will shift its position on multiple issues.”
The Russian leader has reaffirmed Moscow’s readiness to engage with Washington in seeking a “lasting peace” in Ukraine. At the same time, the attack on Putin’s residence and Kiev’s “state terrorism” cannot go unanswered, Ushakov said.
“Given the current situation, Russia’s position on a number of previously reached agreements and pending solutions will be reviewed. This was stated very clearly, and the Americans should take this with due understanding,” he stressed.
The Russians are treating this as terrorism and calling it an attack with “no military purpose other than assassination.”
“Putin hasn’t been living at his residences for three years. He’s been living in the Kremlin for the very reason of concern about the possibility of him being assassinated by Ukrainians.
Whether this was staged, as Ukraine is claiming, or whether it was real, the Russians are treating it as real and are going to act accordingly, which suggests they’re now going to intensify their attacks.
TOP “Full Omaha Beach Battle” Reactions in Saving Private Ryan (1998) Movie | Movie Reaction
What Falls
Written in response to: “Start or end your story with someone standing in the rain.“
Jae Po
On the other hand, even if I had, she pondered, would it have made any difference? Clearly, I was already really enjoying myself then, so nope, probably not. And I definitely wouldn’t have been able to change anything…
“Here you go,” said her last customer as he unknowingly interrupted her thoughts and handed her seven dollars.
Tricia’s eyes widened, her face overcome with joy. The man was taken aback, considering the tip he’d given her, but he also was appreciative that she seemed so appreciative. And she was.
“So, did you crack the big threshold tonight?” Jessica asked Tricia as she was closing out the register later that night.
“Yes! I did!! Thanks to the cheap older gentleman towards the end of my shift. He gave a $7 tip on a $125 total, but I don’t even care. I could’ve kissed him!! I was so psyched.”
Jessica laughed. “Wow, $7? ‘Cheap’ is right. He knows he was wrong for that!”
“Hey, it might as well have been $7,000. It puts me right where I need to be.”
Jessica smiled. “Well, that’s good. I’m really happy for you, Trish. You deserve it.”
Tricia returned the smile. “Thank you, Jess. I’m so excited.”
“So! When are you going?!? I’m surprised you haven’t already left!”
“Ha ha, I wish. I have to close out tonight, and remember, I’ll still need this job when I get back. But you better believe, I’m packing my bags as soon as I get home and hitting the road first thing in the morning!!”
Jessica chuckled. “That’s wonderful. You’ll have to tell me all about it. I’ve heard really great things but have yet to be able to afford it, myself.” She paused for a moment as she tilted her head in thought. “I actually think you might be the first person I know who has done it, so be sure to take lots of pictures, and don’t leave out any of the details when you get back!!”
The dry heat smacked Tricia in the face so hard as she left the building, it felt like an assault. Having been so excited to end her shift and get home, she suddenly realized she’d forgotten to take off her clothes before coming outside.
She looked around, placed her tote bag on the nearby curb, pulled off her shirt, and stepped out of her pants, making her shoulders, chest, stomach, back, and legs the next wretched victims of the heat’s violence.
Still. Better, she thought.
Barely better, but better.
She surveyed her surroundings again before picking up her bag. She wasn’t worried about anyone harassing her as she walked as an older woman at 2 in the morning in just her bra and panties—it was a scene much more common than seeing someone more traditionally clothed—she just didn’t want to risk anyone swiping her bag with her precious accumulated prized earnings of the night. Her tips, including those precious final seven singles.
She needed those seven singles.
After making it to her car safely, she read the temperature on the dashboard: 108°F. Tricia exhaled in exasperation and then turned on her headlights to illuminate the road ahead.
That next morning, she almost tripped darting out of bed. After a quick shower, she put on her comfy bra, underwear, flip-flops, and black shades, and slathered on her 50 SPF sunscreen lotion. With her packed suitcase and big thermos full of ice cubes, she raced out the front door.
As she sat the suitcase alongside the several cases of water—mostly her monthly allotment from the government—in her trunk, she thought again about how much she wished she could afford tint on her windows. It was a luxury only the wealthy could afford. She would have to save up many more years, sacrificing other luxuries such as this trip, to even come close.
She grabbed one of the water bottles, and then set out on the 15-hour-long drive, figuring she would split it up over two days. Soaking her handkerchief with the dew quickly accumulating on her forehead, Tricia took a sip of water and read the dashboard temperature: 112° F.
The ice cube she pulled from her thermos practically disappeared as soon as it hit her skin. Its remnants drizzled down her brow, barely grazing her nose before it plopped onto her bra. That drop was joined by what little was left of the cube, as she slowly rubbed it on her neck and chest, letting the rest melt entirely.
“I know we’ve been suffering a bit out here, folks,” said the radio meteorologist. “…With the highs in the 130s the last few weeks, but fret not, reprieve is coming! You might be able to cover up a bit more than usual, as we can soon expect single digits! And maybe even as low as 98!! Starting just next week.”
“Ah, thank God,” Trish exhaled and dapped her forehead again.
Trying to keep her eye on the road as much as possible, her mind couldn’t help but drift off to where it had been tens of thousands of times before—imagining what it will be like, for the first time in all those years. She could see it, feel it, smell it, even taste it.
It was a few hours before she took another sip of water, always trying to ration what she had, not knowing when she’d get more. She eyed the dashboard which now read123°F. What little breeze had helped her save gas for the first part of the trip had gone completely. She finally rolled up the windows and turned on the air conditioner.
Two days later, Tricia car pulled into the parking lot of the building which displayed giant blue letters:
The Oasis: An Interactive Experience Museum.
She couldn’t believe it. After so many years and so many sacrifices—financial and otherwise—she was finally here.
After dragging her suitcase out of the trunk and towards the building, she soon encountered a smaller sign, in black letters, which read: Please do not bring any bags or luggage inside. Dress as needed before you enter.
Before you enter?!? she thought. That can’t be right. What are they trying to do, roast us?! That should be illegal.
Still, she hurried back to her car, pulled from her suitcase the single shirt and pair of pants she’d brought, and put them on. Then she began excitedly sifting through to find the most important items—those which she’d ordered months ago and had been resting comfortably in her suitcase mostly since.
And there it was. The pretty, pink raincoat with white and yellow polkadots throughout that she had tried on and paraded in front of her bathroom mirror like a little girl in her mommy’s dress clothes nearly every day since it arrived.
Nestled under it were her also-“new” matching rain boots—additionally gently broken-in, thanks to her personal at-home fashion shows.
She stepped in them after kicking off her flip flops but waited to get inside before she put on the coat. She reasoned, no need to die of heat exhaustion just a few feet and minutes away from fulfilling one of her dreams!
Last to grab was her adorable new umbrella. She already had a black one but thought she would treat herself for the occasion. Although she’d seen an umbrella that matched her coat and boots, she’d decided to go a little different for it and instead ordered one that was light-blue and featured “raining” cats and dogs. She’d thought that was so cute.
And now, she was ready. She left the luggage in her car and headed back to the building.
After she was checked in at the front desk, signs led her to the exhibit she had come and paid all of her savings for. On her way, she couldn’t help but notice another standout exhibit that had an incredibly long line of people waiting to get in—even longer than the one she was headed towards. The door that led into it featured a big picture with countless little white balls. She felt a mixture of excitement and sadness as she thought to herself, I’ll have to save up another five years, maybe more, for that one.
Finally, she arrived to her long-awaited exhibit. It didn’t take long for her long line to be ushered by their tour guide into the door with the picture of countless diagonal blue slits.
As they entered, the guide gave Tricia and the other visitors a pair of special glasses. “Put these on,” he said, “And I’ll give you further direction once we get inside. Remember to keep them on to remain in The Experience.”
Tricia put her glasses on and walked through the door, and suddenly, it suddenly was as if she was in the living room of someone’s nicely decorated home. The fireplace roared on one wall. She could almost feel the heat.
And then she turned to her right. And there it was.
She slowly walked towards the open window, taking in the scene as she stepped. Slits of water shot down in a slightly diagonal direction and soaked everything it touched: the concrete and grass below, the trunks and leaves of the trees, the flowers, the bench on the left side, and some colorful playground equipment in the distant right. A jogger running by, seemingly unfazed by the onslaught, while a group of kids jumped around in a big puddle, the mud splashing on their clothes and laughter echoing from them. The occasional car drove by on the road nearby—the water falling and sliding down on each side. Two black, plastic bars swung back and forth on the front window, furiously pushing the water to each side and clearing the driver’s view.
Tricia tried to remember what those things were called. ‘Scrapers,’ I think? ‘Scrapers’ or …’scrubbers’? ‘Rubbers’? ’Swipers’? Oh, wait! That was it. ‘Wipers.” They were called ‘wipers.’ Windshield wipers.
Tricia could hardly contain herself as she approached the home’s front door. She opened it and took in the outdoor scene once more, bracing herself for what she was about to feel. And then, she stepped forward.
Pitter patter, pitter patter, pitter patter sounded off on her raincoat.
Splashes on her legs as she stepped with her boots, which suddenly felt slightly heavier than before to lift.
“Welcome to The Rain Experience,” said the guide. “Up until a little less than three-quarters of a century ago, this was what it felt like when enough precipitation would build up above. It would rain. We would go outside, and water would literally fall from the sky… Just as you’re seeing and feeling now.”
“You’re welcome to keep your raincoats on and use your umbrellas, or you can ditch them both for the full wet experience,” he grinned enthusiastically. “I’ll share some information and history about rain, and I’m happy to take pictures of you at key locations throughout the tour—walking down the sidewalk, sitting in the park, standing next to a building or statue or a car—whatever you want. There will be lots of opportunities!”
Tricia continued walking slowly, nearly pinching herself to confirm this was reality as she listened.
“You can continue to use your earphones to tune into my commentary or mute or remove them as you’d like to more fully immerse yourself into The Experience,” the guide went on. “It’s up to you. Some people come on separate days — once, to hear the full narration, and the other for the non-audio, immersion experience. Of course, an additional visit will require a separate ticket,” he chuckled briefly. “But if you’re able to swing that, it is highly recommended. Otherwise, you may want to split the time accordingly during your visit today. Make it count!”
Tricia kept her earphones in for the moment.
“Back in the days of rain, it sometimes would be on the lighter side, which is what you’re feeling now, to help you to get used to it. They would call it ‘drizzle’ or ‘light showers.’ Other times, it would be a lot more—something they would call a ‘downpour.’ Hang tight and have your umbrellas ready, as we’ll give you a sense of that shortly.”
The tour guide continued, “If it got cold enough in the sky, instead of rain, you’d get snow, which you probably saw the exhibit for on your way in. Cool stuff! You should check it out some time if you haven’t.”
“But back to rain… Back in those days, they sometimes would even have these things called thunderstorms and hurricanes, where certain conditions would make rain powerful and even deadly. You’d see electricity, called ‘lightning,’ in the sky, or the rain would team up with wind and knock down trees and power lines! Those were the hurricanes. Those would get so bad that they could, and would, take out whole towns!”
Tricia’s and the other visitors’ eyes and mouths widened.
“Yeah, I know, right?” the guide continued. “Those hurricanes actually were the last of what we experienced before…getting to where we are now. For centuries, they were pretty infrequent — less than 50 around the world per year. But in the decades leading up to the endless drought, that number had soared to an average of 250 a year! It got to be where there was a different hurricane somewhere around the world each week—some places, each couple of days! And each year, they became more intense than the last. At the same time, more water sources were drying up at rapid speeds. As quickly as the hurricanes were picking up, those sources drying happened even more quickly, which soon thankfully put an end to the hurricanes entirely. No more hurricanes! But not so thankfully, it also meant less and less rain, until it stopped raining completely. And, well, you know the rest. We now have very limited water sources around the world and have largely had to manufacture most of the water you drink, use for cooking, bathing, and so on. But! Unfortunately, one thing they have yet to figure out how to manufacture…is any water-related weather. And hence the founding of The Oasis and what we’ve brought to you here today and have amazed the world with the past 25 years!”
She removed the ear pieces and put them in her pocket. She wanted to enjoy some of the experience of it by itself. But still couldn’t get away from the interruptions entirely.
“Did you ever experience the real thing, Mr.?” a little girl visiting with her parents asked nearby.
The tour guide laughed. “No, I’m only 24. That was way before my time.”
“Oh,” she said.
“But my grandparents experienced it… when they were younger.”
“Yeah, my parents did, too,” the little girl’s mother said.
“Really?” beamed the young girl. “Pa and Nana were alive for real rain?”
Her mother nodded, smiling.
“What did they say it was like?”
“Well, probably just like this. We get to feel what they did back then.”
Tricia looked up towards the virtual rainy sun and tried to tune out the voices around her as the falling water soaked her. Even knowing it wasn’t real, she’d never seen a sun so beautiful. It looked different behind a watery haze. She closed her eyes and let her mind take her back to the lens of her 6-year-old self running and giggling around her family’s yard. Except, this time, instead of just seeing it in her mind, she was able to feel it. Her lips stretched further than they ever had.
Even though she was soaked, Tricia felt a sort of warmth. And not the kind of sweltering “warmth” she and the rest of the world had long been plagued with outside. It was a comforting warmth. A peace. And her heart decided this was the last thing she’d ever want to feel.
Tricia stood for there for a few more minutes, enjoying the downpour as it drenched her from hair to heel.
As the fall slowed, so did her body, until it became limp.
The tour guide and other visitors rushed to her. “Somebody call an ambulance!” were the last words her ears captured. Beyond them, just ahead, her narrowing eyes landed on the much-raved-about display set to conclude The Experience, an arc spectrum of all the colors.
7:00 PM EST — REPORTS Say U.S. “Struck Venezuela Port Facility”
As of 7:00 PM eastern US time on Monday, December 29, reports are coming in claiming the United States has “struck a port facility in Venezuela that operates Narco-Boats.”
At this time it is not yet known which port facility, how large it is, or where it is in Venezuela.
More info as I get it.
This Moon Discovery Is the Most Important in Decades (4K)
A fun video and very interesting.
MM Generated picture experimentation
These were developed in support of the Sir Whiskerton stories.













































Have you ever been ignored by the staff in a store because you didn’t look wealthy enough?
I came first. He served everyone else.
It happened in a fried chicken shop near my office. I wore jeans and a white T-Shirt—nothing fancy. The other customers? Business casual, button-downs, shiny watches. When a staff, Mr. Rude, looked at us, he prioritized their food.
One by one, hot chicken trays landed on their table.
Me? Nothing. I just sat for 15 minutes. Finally, I flagged down another staff—Ms. Nice. She looked surprised. “I’m so sorry. I’ll bring your chicken in 5 minutes.”
And she did. Along with a free soda.
“Apologies for the wait” she said. I told her I didn’t drink soda, but thanked her anyway. She insisted. Touched by her warm gesture, I accepted it. When I finished eating, I handed her a $100 tip.
“You deserved it,” I said. But then…
From behind the counter, Mr. Rude shouted, “Ms. Nice, put tips in the tip box.” She looked nervous, clearly intimidated by him. I stepped in.
“No. That’s for her. Not the store. And definitely not YOU!”
Mr. Rude pushed back. “It’s store policy.”
I slipped the bill into her palm and closed her fingers over it. Then, I marched to the tip box. I pulled out my wallet, took a penny, and dropped it in the box.
“That’s for the store.”
I made it clear that if he stole Ms. Nice’s tip, I’d give the store a bad review. He said nothing, and I left. The next day, I came back to the store—just to peek inside the tip box. No $100 bill. As I turned to leave, I heard a familiar voice.
“It’s you!” Ms. Nice smiled, “I’ll get your chicken. In 3 minutes!”
And somehow, I couldn’t say no.
Hoisin Garlic Burgers

Yield: 5 burgers
Ingredients
- 1 pound lean ground beef
- 1/4 cup bread crumbs
- 1/4 cup chopped green onion
- 3 tablespoons chopped coriander
- 2 tablespoons hoisin sauce
- 2 teaspoons minced garlic
- 1 teaspoon minced ginger root
- 1 egg
- 2 tablespoons water
- 2 tablespoons hoisin sauce
- 1 teaspoon sesame oil
Instructions
- In a bowl combine beef, bread crumbs, green onions, coriander, hoisin sauce, garlic, ginger and egg; mix well.
- In a small bowl whisk together water, hoisin sauce and sesame oil.
- Brush half of the sauce over top of burgers.
- Place on greased grill and barbecue, or place on rack on baking sheet and bake for 15 minutes.
- Turn patties once, and brush with remaining sauce.
Life in China: 32-Year-Old Woman Can’t Find a Husband Because of Her Large Bust
Click bait? Nope. This is the reality in China.
Big boobs aren’t all that attractive to Chinese men. Fish shape is.
I AM A BLASTED TREE
Written in response to: “Set your story during — or just before — a storm.“
HAAKON RAGNSKJOLD
The second time an incredible, bat-winged flying machine appeared in mid-air before crashing. It must have been a hundred feet in length. Men emerged from the craft, apparently not greatly injured.
If I’d thought the flying machine immense, it was as nothing compared to what the third bolt brought forth. The reptilian creature must have towered some five hundred feet in height. Its cry was deafening. Lightning lanced upon the bony plates lining its spine. Pure fire blasted the valley.
I had never run so fast and so far. At last I fell almost senseless by a great white rock. When I came to, I looked at the valley. It nestled between two ranges of mountains. Something did not look right here. It took a moment for it to click into place. The valley extended for what must have been at least fifty miles. But there was no horizon. It just went on an on in a straight line. I was in a gigantic corridor but it was artificial.
Before the lightning had struck me I had glimpsed that dark shape in the sky. Was I in some immense craft? The three women had said I was the first of many. Had I already seen three more? And that gigantic creature? It couldn’t be what I thought it was, even though it looked exactly like what I thought it was. And I…and these others? What kind of job would require something like this?
And I knew who they all were. The man whose father had injected his pregnant wife with a serum of alkaline radicals—made him a super human. He had challenged God on a mountain top and been struck by lightning.
An engineer who had created a steampunk flying machine in the Nineteenth Century. He too had challenged God by flying into the heart of the grandfather of all thunderstorms.
The lizard, it seems, had brought his own lightning to the buffet.
Not a hundred feet from me another bolt of lightning exploded. I was thrown against the white rock. My head cleared and I saw a man appear. He was dressed in rags and tatters. He saw me and swiftly approached.
When he drew near, I was shocked at his appearance. His hair was black and matted. His eyes were yellow and watery. His skin yellow, like parchment. I had no strength left. If he meant me harm I could not fight him. He was as tall as the white rock I’d rested against—a giant of eight feet.
“Do you understand the English tongue?”
I nodded.
“I do not know where I am. I thought I was dead. I should be dead. I went out to die. I know the thunders of heaven struck me. I am a blasted tree. The bolt has entered my soul.”
The creature looked into my eyes. Up this close the full impact of who, and what, I was seeing took my breath away. I could well understand how his creator had recoiled from his creation in horror, calling what he saw hideous. The man was indeed hideous. Yet, I could see there that he had chosen the features for their beauty. But that this thing lived had turned its beauty into ashes.
I tried to cam myself. I had no doubt this being could tear me limb from limb if he wished.
“Were you struck by lightning,” I asked. “Your clothes. There are burnt patches.”
“I have wanted to die. For all I have done I deserve to die. I gathered the wood for my pyre. Fire came from above. I felt its agonies. Wilt Thou burn out all the evil I have done? Let its pain grant me redemption and forgiveness. Let me scream in its agonies as that my suffering may surpass that which I inflicted.”
Lost in his soliloquy, the creature looked at me, seemingly for the first time. His hand stroked my face.
“You, too, are scarred. You are like me.” He leaned in close.
“Are you like me in other ways? Did he make you too?” I could not read the creature’s thoughts, nor gain insight as to his intentions. Did he think I was a second of his creator’s efforts?
The creature shook his head. “No. You have been scarred and flawed, but the hand of God has made you. You need not fear me. Vengeance’ has gained me nothing. I took the life of those who had never wronged me. I have suffered and suffered for the evil I did the innocent, who never did me wrong. You have done me no evil.”
He set his hand on my shoulder and it seemed those eyes looked deep into my soul.
“Will you be my friend?”
I admit I was taken back by this request. I knew exactly who, and what I was dealing with here, though it was impossible for me to understand how these things could be. Certainly, to refuse this request would be perilous. But to accept it without being truly sincere, and acquiescing only out of fear would not do. If I said yes, it must be out of a sincere heart, and not just an attempt to escape death. I had already endeavored to kill myself on Mount Washington—if I die now, I would only be gaining my wish, however belatedly.
The fact is, if the story was true, this man might never had had a friend in his entire life. How like him I felt. There was no need to search my soul. Could I deny to another sufferer that which I had so longed for in my life, and never really had?
I raised my hand to his shoulder. “Of course I will.” And I saw how well his creator had made him, for those tear ducts were now flooded.
We talked for long after that. I had often thought of the story. The monster had often been characterized as evil—yet, was it not his creator’s rejection of, what was without a doubt his own child, that had resulted in those acts he did? Certainly they were wrong. But the creature had long put such intentions far from himself. Indeed, his resolve to destroy his very own self witnessed to the desire to atone.
“What is your name?’
“Jhäeggr. And you?”
“He never even gave me a name. I was so hideous in his eyes that he could not regard me as a child of his labors, but a deserving inhabitant of the dunghill. Though I am unlike all men, and have none of the rights they may call their own—may a man not strive after such wishes? May a man not try to attain what others have by right? May he not be willing to pay a great price for his freedom, though others are freeborn?
“I thought I should call myself Adam, since I, like that first Adam, was created by the hand of his Father. But I was certainly not made in my father’s image, as he was in His. I am truly a monstrous thing. And I should not have been. But was my father not monstrous, who turned away from me in disgust? I was indeed the thing you see, while he was fair, comely and straight. But as I was in visage, he was in heart. So I do my father proud. He has paid for his crimes. I will honor my father, who am so monstrous as was he. I am Victor.”
“That is another way we are alike, Victor. I, too, picked a name for myself.”
“There are many ways we are alike. Our names, which we have chosen. That we have endured terrible scarring. That we both seek a mate and have always been denied. And…you too went out into the frozen wilderness, as did I, to put an end to your life. Why did you seek to do this?”
“I was tired of being alone as I was. Like you, I had no companion—not even friend to lighten my load. You were denied that—but did he not start to build you…?”
“It was all I asked of him. He reneged on our contract. So close it came. Do you understand my rage? Bad enough he brought me into existence and did not take responsibility for me. But to create another, to so lift up my hopes—and then take an ax to her before she had even tasted of life? Hard enough to lose what you did not even know you had—but to see the fruit near ready for the plucking, snatched from your grasp, thrown down and ground down by hateful tread. He declared it was to protect man, he feared what the two of us would do—but what I did far outshone the mightiest of his fears. If anything had ever made me an enemy of the human race, it was that solitary act of murder—torn from my grasp, murdered before she even drew her first breath!”
I had never imagined such depths of feeling. Rage enfolded him like the lightning storm that had embraced me. But in a moment it was gone. And great, wracking sobs overcame him. Though deep down I feared this being and knew not what would follow, I could not deny the fellow feeling. I set my hands on his shoulders. Not even looking at me I knew that never had he had another to suffer with him and be to him a sympathetic ear.
The face that looked up to me was that of a different man. With that deluge of sorrow, and with another to share his grief it was as if he had truly become human. I was not fooled. He had always been human, but enduring unconscionable suffering had driven him near to madness.
He had recovered himself. There was a curious expression on his face. “You, too sought to destroy yourself. But why?”
“I told you. I couldn’t endure the suffering any longer. I had no more purpose to live. It was better I was gone. I would inconvenience no one any longer”
Victor looked at me strangely.
“I should never have been given life. By destroying myself I might atone for what I had done. My ashes might then be of some use to at least fertilize the earth. But what would your death prove? You were no blasphemy to life like I was. God had made you. You are lawful life—yet you wanted to destroy yourself. Help me comprehend this.”
“Victor—my own mother did not want me to be. Months before I should have been born, I was torn out of her womb. This I learned long after. If my own mother didn’t want me…”
“Why then are you still living if they meant to take your life?”
“A nurse found me. I was on the steel table, gasping out my life. She endangered her own job. She snuck me out of there. She gave me a chance.” I did not like the look on Victor’s face.
“And this is how you reward this woman’s sacrifice? You were scheduled to die. Your life was spared.”
“Look at me—look at my face! Who will love me as I am? I haven’t a single hope in hell of that! Do you think I want to keep on living like this?”
I couldn’t conceive how someone that big could move so fast. I didn’t see his arm moving. I felt the blow as he back handed me. I must have flown fifteen feet. The astonishment hurt worse than getting struck.
“Your self-pity disgusts me. You think you’re so hideous? Look up at the face that a creator couldn’t even bear to set his eyes on. Then tell me if you think you’re hideous. I am a blasphemy—but you, you’re life is lawful. You have not the right to take what God’s given you. You would have died had He not put that nurse there. You would have died had not that thing found you in the forest. You would have died had not the lightning taken you to this place like it took me. It took me! It found a use for me! No reason for you to live? You’ve been given a reason! You’re needed for something more important than your own little life. If it wants me, as lawless as I am—how much more you?” Victor’s eyes softened.
“I am sorry I was so hard on you. Give me your hand. I’ll help you up. Do not despair. Someday someone may find you. I found someone a long time ago. It was her I told my story to. No one before her had ever failed to recoil from me in disgust. She could not be the mate I sought—and yet, what she became—that was so much more. If I inspired her—she in turn inspired me. Each, the other’s muse. I will never forget her.
“So if I, who am a monster, was that one time, able to find such a one, dare you think to have less chance than I? Do you think yourself more monstrous?
“Something has brought us both to this place. Chanced us new possibilities. I see it. Can you not see it as well, my friend? Come—let us see what fortune has set our steps upon. There is life in both of us. Let us see what we can make of it. Will you come with me?”
I nodded. Victor was right. Self pity. There was no room for it, not when this great new adventure had opened up the doors. Several miles away I saw another flash of lightning light up the azure sky.
Wife Caught Cheating, claims it Was an Accident
Jalapeño-Cheddar Stuffed Burgers
This burger has layers of flavor from the seasoning in the ground beef to the molten center of Cheddar cheese with jalapeño slices.


Prep:15 min | Cook: 12 min | Yield: 3 servings
Ingredients
- 1 onion
- 1 pound ground beef
- 1 envelope burger seasoning mix (any flavor desired)
- 2 jalapeño chilies, seeded and sliced thin crosswise (1/4 inch thick)
- 9 tablespoons finely shredded Cheddar cheese, divided
- 3 hamburger buns
Instructions
- Caramelize the onion. (How to Caramelize Onions)
- Mix ground beef and seasoning mix until well blended.
- Divide ground beef mixture evenly in 6 balls. Form each into a thin patty.
- For each burger, sprinkle 1 tablespoon of the shredded cheese on 1 patty.
- Top with about 4 chile slices and an additional 2 tablespoons cheese.
- Top with second patty, pressing edges to seal.
- Repeat to form a total of 3 burgers.
- Grill burgers over medium heat for 5 to 6 minutes per side or until cooked through (internal temperature of 160 degrees F).
- Serve burgers on rolls topped with caramelized onions.
Beautiful Russian Village Girl Invites Me To Village Sauna
Sir Whiskerton and the Runny Nose Riddle: A Tale of Slime, Sniffles, and a Very Slippery Rat
Ah, dear reader, steel your sinuses for a tale so drippy, so mucous-laden, that even the barn’s dust mites are clutching their tiny handkerchiefs. Today’s mystery begins with a trail of slime, a melodramatic rat, and a perfume so potent it could wilt a sunflower. So grab a tissue (or twelve) and join me for Sir Whiskerton and the Runny Nose Riddle: A Tale of Slime, Sniffles, and a Very Slippery Rat.
The Crime Scene: A Slime of Unusual Size
It was a misty morning on the farm when Sir Whiskerton discovered the first clue: a glistening trail of slime leading from the feed bin to the hayloft.
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“Fascinating,” Sir Whiskerton mused, adjusting his monocle. “This case is slippery.”
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“Slippery! Slippery!” Ditto echoed, before stepping in the slime and whoosh—sliding across the barn like a furry hockey puck. “WHEEE—ACHOO!”
The slime led to Ratso the Rat, who was slumped against a hay bale, clutching a soggy handkerchief. His usual film-noir bravado was drowning in sniffles.
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“It was a dame,” Ratso croaked, his voice more nasal than noir. “A dame with… sniff… too much perfume.”
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“Ah,” Sir Whiskerton said. “You mean Echo.”
Echo the Sheep, notorious for her “Eau de Barnyard Floral” perfume (made from fermented dandelions and regret), had recently returned from a spa day.
The Suspect: A Perfume Pandemonium
Echo blinked innocently as the animals confronted her.
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“Me? Over-scented?” she gasped, her wool puffing up. “I just wanted to smell nice for the hay bale gala!”
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“Nice?!” Ratso sneezed so hard his fedora flew off. “You smell like a flower exploded in a soap factory!”
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“It’s art,” Echo huffed.
Meanwhile, Ditto had discovered the joys of slime-powered propulsion.
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“Watch this!” He sneezed mid-slide, launching himself into a bucket. “ACHOO—WHEEEE—CLANG!”
The Resolution: A Tissue Treaty
Sir Whiskerton, ever the diplomat, brokered a peace deal:
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Echo would limit her perfume to three spritzes per week (or until the geese complained).
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Ratso would stop monologuing about “the scent of betrayal” every time he sniffled.
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Ditto was banned from slime-sliding (a rule broken within minutes).
The farmer, observing the chaos, nailed a sign to the barn:
“ALLERGIC TO DRAMA? STAY OUT.”
Moral of the Story? Allergies are no joke—unless you’re wearing a fedora and sliding in slime.
The End.
Post-Credit Scene:
Chef Remy LeRaccoon bottles the slime as “Organic Snail Serum.” Doris buys six jars.
Best Lines:
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“This case is slippery!” – Sir Whiskerton, forensic genius
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“ACHOO—WHEEEE—CLANG!” – Ditto, Olympic slime-slider
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“You smell like a flower exploded in a soap factory!” – Ratso, perfume critic
Starring:
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Sir Whiskerton (Detective with a Very Itchy Nose)
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Ratso (Noir Rat Turned Sniffling Mess)
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Echo (Perfume Perpetrator)
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Ditto (Slime-Slide Champion)
Key Jokes:
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Ratso’s dramatic monologue keeps getting interrupted by sneeze crescendos.
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The slime trail spells “HELP” at one point (courtesy of Ditto’s chaos).
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Bessie offers “allergy-reducing vibes” (which are just her humming off-key).
P.S.
Remember: If your perfume clears a room, you’re not elegant—you’re a biohazard.
China won’t allow Taiwan to become the next Ukraine
Not gonna happen.
How can I find out who’s stealing my lunch from the office fridge?
This is my mother’s story (and she wants me to be anonymous in case of any potential issues)
In a small doctor clinic, there was a food thief. Bits and pieces of lunches would be stolen from. Maybe a brownie, maybe a sandwich, maybe a snack, it was hard to predict what would be stolen from whose lunch. Over time, more and more would be taken. And the staff had been well-established for awhile with no new hires, making it hard to track down who was the thief.
My mom and a few co-workers had enough of it. They decided to spice up their food. Nothing lethal like some other answers. Just sandwiches dripping with hot sauce, extra pepper & spices on leftover dishes, only the extremely hot varieties of snack foods, even hot peppers doused in chocolate to look like strawberries. Those ladies would “smoke out” the thief no problem.
But they ran into a hiccup.
Yes, the food was stolen as planned. However, there were no screams of terror, cries of agony or even any trace of someone in pain. Empty wrappers were in the garbage with no trace of the food so the food was eaten. The thief had a taste for hot, spicy foods.
A lot of people in the office either disliked or couldn’t stomach spicy foods. The list of potential thieves were narrowed down. The group could not let this go. They HAD to nail the thief.
I tried suggesting to my mother to mix in laxatives or adding hotter chili peppers (I did have access to the California Reaper peppers) but she declined. If the food got out into public waiting area or there was a mess/injury created by the methods I suggested, there’d be trouble. My mom’s also a kind person; unless someone threatened people she cared about, she wouldn’t dream of harming anyone. Also her goal was to catch the coward who dared sneak food. If she could at least get the identity and proof, she could bring it to the higher ups for proper punishment.
And then came Plan B.
Mom and the group adjusted their lunches. It would look innocent enough but once eaten, would leave evidence. Homemade cupcakes with colorful frosting? The heavy blue dye would get all over your teeth. Cheetos? Unless you washed your hands awhile, there’d be an orange sheen to them. French onion soup with extra onions? Good luck covering your breath, gum can only do so much. These are just a few examples.
By observing other co-workers, they were able to catch the thief and use evidence to bring the higher ups. The thief wasn’t fired, though the next office problem would get her fired (she had a history of stirring up drama) Everyone else in the office guarded their lunches carefully and coldly shut the thief out of their social circles. No one could trust her with any important task or feel safe inviting her out on work parties. But hey, would you trust a thief?

