When I was a young boy, my father took me to watch the movie “Fantastic Voyage”.
Fantastic Voyage" is a 1966 science fiction film directed by Richard Fleischer. The movie centers around a groundbreaking and imaginative concept: miniaturizing a team of scientists and sending them inside a human body to perform a life-saving procedure. Plot Summary The story begins with the assassination attempt on a prominent scientist, Dr. Jan Benes, who possesses critical knowledge about a new technology that could benefit humanity. To save him, a team of experts is miniaturized in a submarine-like craft called the **Proteus**. The team, which includes a physician, a scientist, and a crew member, is injected into Dr. Benes’s bloodstream. As they navigate through the various systems of the body, such as the bloodstream and the brain, they encounter numerous challenges, including hostile immune responses and the complexities of the human anatomy. The mission is complicated by the presence of a traitor among the crew, who has ulterior motives that jeopardize their mission and Dr. Benes's life. Themes and Visual Effects "Fantastic Voyage" explores themes of science, exploration, and the fragility of life. The film is notable for its innovative special effects, which were groundbreaking at the time. The visual representation of the human body, complete with colorful depictions of cells and organs, captivated audiences and has influenced many subsequent science fiction works. Reception The film received mixed reviews upon its release but has since gained a cult following. It was praised for its imaginative premise and special effects, contributing to the genre of science fiction films that explore the inner workings of the human body. Overall, "Fantastic Voyage" remains a classic in the sci-fi genre, combining adventure, science, and a touch of intrigue in a unique narrative.
My dad loved it. Probably because Raquel Welch was in it. But I really enjoyed the adventure segments in it.
It fit my boy hood life.
Oh Rachael…
Raquel Welch starred in the movie Fantastic Voyage. She played the role of Cora, a medical technician and one of the key members of the team that is miniaturized and sent into the human body. Her performance contributed to the film's appeal, and she became one of the notable figures associated with this classic science fiction movie.
Young boyhood. Riding bicycles.
Building models.
Hiking in the woods.
Playing ball with the other boys, and living those days of adventure.
Anyways…
Great movie for a young boy. Though I don’t know if I would enjoy it today.
Today…
What is the most shocked you have been when waking up?
When I was 18 years old living in Southern California myself and a few friends decided to go to Ensenada, Mexico to drink as it was legal there. Well, after a night of mucho fiesta we crashed in our motel room and as it was hot, we left the motel door open. I awoke the next morning with fierce hangover, and looking out the door saw an elephant walk by! It turns out that a circus had come to town and a parade was passing by. Quite the shock seeing that.
blink-182 – All The Small Things (Official Music Video)
What is the weirdest thing that’s ever happened to you at a bar?
“Tommy lost his cell phone.”
Thisbwas in 2005, when cell phones were just becoming a big deal. They weren’t smart yet, but they had cameras and text was just starting to become more important than talk.
Anyhow, Tommy lost his cell phone at a jumping little bar/dance club somewhere in Raliegh, NC. They were curious if anyone had seen it. It had a Stone Temple Pilots sticker on it. Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked for it. There was easily 100 people in the place, if not more (I guess it wasn’t that little.) Eventually, they turned off the music and turned up the house lights.
Finally, someone suggested that they call it. So, everyone in the place got super quiet, and someone dialed Tommy’s number. The ringer was off, but it was on vibrate. A girl heard it buzzing. It had fallen in a crack between two booth seats, and the bar tender extracted it with a large kitchen knife he used to cut lemons. Eveyone cheered like their team won the Super Bowl.
Lights down, music up, and we returned to our regularly scheduled program.
Can consciousness exist before birth? What are the theories surrounding the origin of consciousness?
Honestly, we are not sure. Nevertheless, all research on near-death and afterlife experiences is pointing towards independence of Consciousness from our bodies. Personally, I can confirm this position from many of my own near-death experiences and one about ten days lasting afterlife experience.
Those experiences somehow motivated my own research on emergent information processing, complex systems, self-organization, and emergence [1–3]. While we are looking for the following animation of a massively-parallel computing environment, without going into mathematical details [1], we see a medium—that can be called matrix—and do not see micro-processes defining evolution of the matrix. In this particular case, the matrix has only two states, a close neighborhood (shown in the inset), and simple, homogeneous micro-evolution rule.
Animation: An iconic multilevel emergent system that arises from random initial conditions. While looking at this animation using lenses of spirit, we see only product of activity of unseen matrix, micro-processes, and neighborhood.
In general, we can say that unseen realms are perpetuating the emergence of by-us-seen realms. Those unseen realms can be called—according to the hypothesis defined here—consciousness. In reality, all unseen realities are more complicated that demonstrated in this answer. Yet the very principles are captured. To make things even more complicated, it can be that some emergent layers belong to unseen realms and only some others are seen by our gross sensory systems.
What is your take on this text? What thoughts go through your head after reading this hypothesis? Do not hesitate to contact me. Have a good way. 🙂 🙏
References:
[1] Jiri Kroc: “Emergent Information Processing: Observations, Experiments, and Future Directions”, Software 2024, 3(1), 81-106; DOI:10.3390/software3010005
[2] Jiri Kroc: “Exploring Emergence: Video-Database of Emergents Found in Advanced Cellular Automaton ‘Game of Life’ Using GoL-N24 Software”, database, ResearchGate (September 2023).
[3] Jiri Kroc: “Python program GoL-N24 simulating the ‘Game of Life’ with variable neighborhood using eight neighbors from 24 possible”, open-source Python software, ResearchGate (November 2022).
Have you ever met an inmate that was actually a very nice person but did absolutely horrifying crimes? If so, what’s their story?
The story of Rick
Halfway through my two month stay a new inmate arrived. Rick.
In his 40s. Longish hair and beard. Biggish guy. Quiet. Soft deep voice. Nice. Polite. Respectful.
The crime… assault. With a big stick ( piece of lumber). He had no regrets and was happy to do his jail time.
The “victim”… his next door neighbour who had repeatedly beat his own son.
Rick didn’t have any childten.
Rick suggested to the neighboyr that he should stop beating his son.
The neighbour must have forgotten the warning or not taken Ruck’s warning seriously… and beat his son again.
So Rick “reminded” the neighbour he had been asked to not to do that… with the stick. Teach him the hard wsy what it feels like to be beaten.
Every body liked Rick.
Rick said… if I have to do it again… I will do it again.
Inmates very very much look down on others who abuse helpless/defenseless victims… (women and children). Rick was the opposite of that… a champion of the defenseless.
I think Rick was doing 6 months, and that it was a lenient sentence from a semi understanding judge.
What was your most unforgettable “oops” moment?
Letting a friend talk me into playing bridge in a tournament (in contrast to a friendly game after dinner).
Hand 3, the opponents screamed “Director!” The director came to the table and the opponents complained I didn’t stop to think before passing. I said that the dealer opened 3 Hearts and I had a very bad hand, so I passed without needing to think much. The director told me that’s cheating — I was supposed to think for 10 seconds. He penalized our partnership.
Hand 6, the opponents screamed “Director!” In a similar situation, I deliberately paused. The opponents told the director I thought too long. I told the director “You told me I’m supposed to pause.” The opponents said “You paused longer than 10 seconds.” The director told me to pause TEN seconds and penalized our partnership.
Hand 9, similar situation. I wanted to make sure I waited 10 seconds, but I hadn’t known to wear a wristwatch to a bridge game. I turned around so I could see a wall clock with a second hand and waited 10 seconds. The opponents screamed “Director!” The director came to the table, and told me I cheated — I’m not allowed to consult a clock. He penalized our partnership.
Hand 13, during the bidding, I saw a friend come in the room; I hadn’t seen him in a long time. I smiled. The opponents screamed “Director!” The director came to the table and told me it’s illegal and unethical to smile during the bidding or play of a hand, and penalized our partnership.
At the end of the game, our score was 13% (for those who don’t play tournament bridge, that’s low). The director tried to comfort me, and said “We will welcome you back next week.”
Me: “I can’t. A week from tomorrow, I have a colonoscopy scheduled, and I must prepare for it. Tonight will help me prepare. As I sit on the couch drinking that stuff, or rushing to the toilet to frantically yank my sweatpants down, I’ll remind myself ‘This isn’t so bad. A week ago, I was playing bridge in that hellhole.’”
Sachs: The BRICS Summit Should Mark The End Of Neocon Delusions
Authored by Jeffrey Sachs via Scheerpost.com,
The recent BRICS Summit in Kazan, Russia should mark the end of the Neocon delusions encapsulated in the subtitle of Zbigniew Brzezinski’s 1997 book, The Global Chessboard: American Primacy and its Geostrategic Imperatives. Since the 1990s, the goal of American foreign policy has been “primacy,” aka global hegemony. The U.S. methods of choice have been wars, regime change operations, and unilateral coercive measures (economic sanctions). Kazan brought together 35 countries with more than half the world population that reject the U.S. bullying and that are not cowed by U.S. claims of hegemony.
In the Kazan Declaration, the countries underscored “the emergence of new centres of power, policy decision-making and economic growth, which can pave the way for a more equitable, just, democratic and balanced multipolar world order.”
They emphasized “the need to adapt the current architecture of international relations to better reflect the contemporary realities,” while declaring their “commitment to multilateralism and upholding the international law, including the Purposes and Principles enshrined in the Charter of the United Nations (UN) as its indispensable cornerstone.” They took particular aim at the sanctions imposed by the U.S. and its allies, holding that “Such measures undermine the UN Charter, the multilateral trading system, the sustainable development and environmental agreements.”
Time has run out on the neocon delusions, and the U.S. wars of choice.
The neocon quest for global hegemony has deep historical roots in America’s belief in its exceptionalism. In 1630, John Winthrop invoked the Gospels in describing the Massachusetts Bay Colony as a “City on the Hill,” declaring grandiosely that “The eyes of all people are upon us.” In the 19th century, America was guided by Manifest Destiny, to conquer North America by displacing or exterminating the native peoples. In the course of World War II, Americans embraced the idea of the “American Century,” that after the war the U.S. would lead the world.
The U.S. delusions of grandeur were supercharged with the collapse of the Soviet Union at the end of 1991. With America’s Cold War nemesis gone, the ascendant American neoconservatives conceived of a new world order in which the U.S. was the sole superpower and the policeman of the world. Their foreign policy instruments of choice were wars and regime-change operations to overthrow governments they disliked.
Following 9/11, the neocons planned to overthrow seven governments in the Islamic world, starting with Iraq, and then moving on to Syria, Lebanon, Libya, Somalia, Sudan, and Iran. According to Wesley Clark, former Supreme Commander of NATO, the neocons expected the U.S. to prevail in these wars in 5 years. Yet now, more than 20 years on, the neocon-instigated wars continue while the U.S. has achieved absolutely none of its hegemonic objectives.
The neocons reasoned back in the 1990s that no country or group of countries would ever dare to stand up to U.S. power. Brzezinski, for example, argued in The Grand Chessboard that Russia would have no choice but to submit to the U.S.-led expansion of NATO and the geopolitical dictates of the U.S. and Europe, since there was no realistic prospect of Russia successfully forming an anti-hegemonic coalition with China, Iran and others. As Brzezinski put it:
“Russia’s only real geostrategic option—the option that could give Russia a realistic international role and also maximize the opportunity of transforming and socially modernizing itself—is Europe. And not just any Europe, but the transatlantic Europe of the enlarging EU and NATO.”
(emphasis added, Kindle edition, p. 118)
Brzezinski was decisively wrong, and his misjudgment helped to lead to the disaster of the war in Ukraine. Russia did not simply succumb to the U.S. plan to expand NATO to Ukraine, as Brzezinski assumed it would. Russia said a firm no, and was prepared to wage war to stop the U.S. plans. As a result of the neocon miscalculations vis-à-vis Ukraine, Russia is now prevailing on the battlefield, and hundreds of thousands of Ukrainians are dead.
Nor—and this is the plain message from Kazan—did U.S. sanctions and diplomatic pressures isolate Russian in the least. In response to pervasive U.S. bullying, an anti-hegemonic counterweight has emerged. Simply put, the majority of the world does not want or accept U.S. hegemony, and is prepared to face it down rather than submit to its dictates. Nor does the U.S. anymore possess the economic, financial, or military power to enforce its will, if it ever did.
The countries that assembled in Kazan represent a clear majority of the world’s population. The nine BRICS members (Brazil, Russia, India, China, and South Africa as the original five, plus Egypt, Ethiopia, Iran, and the United Arab Emirates), in addition to the delegations of 27 aspiring members, constitute 57 percent of the world’s population and 47 percent of the world’s output (measured at purchasing-power adjusted prices). The U.S., by contrast, constitutes 4.1 percent of the world population and 15 percent of world output. Add in the U.S. allies, and the population share of the U.S.-led alliance is around 15 percent of the global population.
The BRICS will gain in relative economic weight, technological prowess, and military strength in the years ahead. The combined GDP of the BRICS countries is growing at around 5 percent per annum, while the combined GDP of the U.S. and its allies in Europe and the Asia-Pacific is growing at around 2 percent per annum.
Even with their growing clout, however, the BRICS can’t replace the U.S. as a new global hegemon. They simply lack the military, financial, and technological power to defeat the U.S. or even to threaten its vital interests. The BRICS are in practice calling for a new and realistic multipolarity, not an alternative hegemony in which they are in charge.
American strategists should heed the ultimately positive message coming from Kazan. Not only has the neocon quest for global hegemony failed, it has been a costly disaster for the US and the world, leading to bloody and pointless wars, economic shocks, mass displacements of populations, and rising threats of nuclear confrontation. A more inclusive and equitable multipolar world order offers a promising path out of the current morass, one that can benefit the U.S. and its allies as well as the nations that met in Kazan.
The rise of the BRICS is therefore not merely a rebuke to the U.S., but also a potential opening for a far more peaceful and secure world order. The multipolar world order envisioned by the BRICS can be a boon for all countries, including the United States. Time has run out on the neocon delusions, and the U.S. wars of choice. The moment has arrived for a renewed diplomacy to end the conflicts raging around the world.
20 Low-Cost Countries Where $100 a Week Covers EVERYTHING
Why was China so poor in the 19th-20th century? The annual income was $200 dollars or less than $1 dollar per day. How did China become one of the poorest of the poor nations on Earth with $200 annual income?
The last Chinese dynasty, the Qing, was corrupt and weak. Consequently, it was exploited by the major Western powers in the period known as the “century of humiliation”—from about 1839 to 1949.
From the ashes of this centenary disaster rose the People’s Republic of China like a phoenix. Today, China is open to the world for business. Every year, millions of foreign tourists visit China, and every year, millions of Chinese travel the world over for vacation.
How did China do all this? Basically, it boils down to 3 reasons:
- China has a strong central government that is very capable and intelligent. It produces good policies and executes those policies efficiently.
- China has a vast population. It was around a billion 45 years ago and it’s 1.4 billion today. Generally speaking, population is economic destiny.
- The Chinese people are very clever and hardworking. They are driven to succeed.
The Only Chili Recipe You’ll Ever Need
My Mom’s Award Winning Chili is one of my favorite recipes that she makes. It is a very meaty chili with a little bit of heat and lots of flavor.
This is a chili that can be made on the stove top or in the crockpot. It is hearty and delicious.
It’s also one of her recipes that I not only look forward to eating fresh but actually love eating as leftovers. This chili is also delicious on a chili dog.
Everyone loves this chili when they try it for the first time. I dare say that it is the best chili in the world!
There is a full, printable recipe card at the end of this post. You can hit the print button under the picture of the chili and the full recipe will come up on one page with no ads.
You can print this recipe or screenshot it and save it to your phone.
If you are a Pinterest person, there is a Pinterest button at the top you can use to pin this to your page. I am also on Pinterest as The Tipsy Housewife.
Give me a follow over there for many more recipe ideas.
To Bean Or Not To Bean
The beauty of this chili recipe is that you can add beans if you like them or omit them if you do not like them. I love kidney beans so I enjoy when my mom adds them.
Mom likes black beans and I do not, so she leaves them out when she makes this for me. If you leave the beans out, this makes a great topping for hot dogs.
I suggest freezing a few cups of this chili that you can thaw and use on campfire hot dogs in the Summer!
Onions & Peppers, Oh My!
You will see on the recipe card that Mom cuts the two different sized onions in two different ways. She likes for the majority of the onions to dissolve into the sauce and add flavor.
The other onion Mom cuts into a larger dice so that you have bites of onion in your bowl of chili. She also uses green pepper and a poblano pepper.
None of this adds heat, just a peppery flavor to the chili that is so good.
If you can’t find a poblano pepper, do not sweat it. It will still be good, but make sure you try it sometime with the poblano.
You won’t regret it!
Fat Adds Flavor
When Mom makes this she does not drain the beef after it is browned. You will see this in the steps on the recipe card.
She says that this all adds flavor as it simmers. When the chili is done cooking she skims some of the fat that rises to the top.
I personally think this chili tastes better when you let it sit overnight in the fridge. If you do this, the fat will rise to the top and slightly solidify then you can easily skim it.
In my opinion, chili is supposed to be slightly greasy so I do not worry about this too much. If it bothers you, you can easily drain the meat after it is cooked and before you add the spices.
Seasoning Is A Suggestion
You will see the measurements for the chili seasonings in the recipe card. As always, the seasoning is a suggestion.
Feel free to adjust however you like. I do not find this chili to be overly spicy, but there is flavor. This chili does not necessarily burn your mouth from spice, but everyone’s tastebuds are different.
You may want to taste as you go and you can always add more spice after. I would really suggest sticking to her recipe closely, but she also eyeballs a lot of this most of the time and it is always good.
Chipotle Cinnamon
I was given this Chipotle Cinnamon by a friend and Mom loves to use it in her chili. I will admit, it adds great flavor.
The one we have is by this brand The Spice Hunter. You can check their site to see where to buy it.
I also see that they sell this brand on Amazon. I think it is around $8.
*The above link is my Amazon Affiliate link, which means that Amazon pays me a small commission when you use the link and this comes at no extra cost to you*.
I also see with a quick google search that there are lots of other spice companies that make something similar. I can just vouch for this one.
The chili will be fine with regular cinnamon as well if you don’t want to buy an extra spice.
Whether you eat this as is, over a hot dog, or over fries I know you’ll love it.
I suppose you could even eat it over spaghetti… if you live in Cincinnati…
Yield: 12 to 15 Servings
My Mom’s Award Winning Chili
My Mom’s Award Winning Chili is one of my favorite recipes that she makes. It is a very meaty chili with a little bit of heat and lots of flavor. This is a chili that can be made on the stove top, or in the crockpot. It is hearty and delicious.
Ingredients
- 3 to 4 lbs of ground beef (80/20 Mix)
- 1 large and 1 medium sized yellow onions (mince the large onion finely and then dice the medium sized onion) *this is so some of the onions melt into the chili and then some are left in the chili
- 2 to 3 garlic cloves chopped or crushed
- 2 green peppers, seeded and diced
- 1 poblano pepper, seeded and diced (can omit if you cannot find)
- 3 or 4 14.5 ounce cans of fire roasted diced tomatoes (she buys the one at aldi) you can sub other diced tomatoes if you cannot find
- 1/3 cup of chili powder (she always ends up adding a little more to taste)
- 1 tablespoon of smoked or regular paprika
- 1/2 teaspoon of garlic salt
- 1/2 teaspoon of garlic powder
- 1/2 tsp of chili pepper flakes (you can add more or less)
- 1/2 teaspoon of cinnamon (she sometimes uses a chipotle cinnamon we have thats special)
- Just under 1 tablespoon of sugar (reduces the acid)
- couple of shakes of dried Italian seasoning or oregano (about 1/4 teaspoon)
- little bit of cooking oil or butter
Instructions
- Add your butter or cooking oil to a stock pot, then add your onions, green peppers and poblano peppers and garlic to the pot and sauté until golden brown and soft.
- Add your ground beef and cook all the way through, breaking the meat up into a crumble as it cooks. Mom does not drain the beef, she lets it cook with all the meat drippings, then skims the fat off the top at the end. You can drain it if you wish.
- When the meat is cooked, add your garlic salt, black pepper, paprika, cinnamon, chili powder, Italian seasoning, dried chili flake and sugar and sauté for a minute or two with the meat and the veggies. Taste and add some salt if needed or more of any of the seasonings if needed.
- Add the cans of tomatoes with the juice from the cans (do not drain). Give this all a good stir and bring to a simmer. Turn the heat down to low, cover and cook 2 to 3 hours. Stir this occasionally. If you want to make this in a crock pot, you can follow all the steps above and allow it to cook low and slow in the crock pot for 6 to 8 hours.
- While this cooks you can also use a ground meat chopper to break up the tomatoes more as they cook. They usually break down fairly easily on their own with a few chunks left.
- When this is done cooking you can eat right away if you want. You can skim some of the fat off the top with a ladle. The liquid will absorb into the meat mixture once it is removed from the heat and thicken.
- You can also make this a day ahead of time and let this sit covered in the fridge overnight, it will thicken up and the fat will rise to the top and you can take as much of it off as you want when it is slightly solid from being cold and then reheat this all and serve.
- You can also add a can of kidney beans or black beans if you want when you add the tomatoes. Mom does not drain the kidney beans but she slightly drains and rinses the black beans.
- Freezes well.
How I see the UK after 3 years living in China (I went home and was disgusted.)
What is the worst thing about New Zealand?
New Zealand is so nice that one tends to forgive a lot of things.
Also, some of the bits that aren’t so nice about New Zealand are still a lot better than in a lot of other places in the world, so I won’t even elaborate on… :
leaky homes that just never get warm properly
an obsession with heat pumps, which are noisy things that give you hot air and a house cold to the touch
closet mould problems
expensive used cars that will still be quite old
limited shopping opportunities
limited product selection
dead possums on the roads every ten metres
a strange preference for washing machines that wash with cold water
surprisingly negative statistics regarding domestic violence
a rowdy drinking culture that can run with Britain’s worst
Like I said, I used to look past these things during my years in NZ, because they are eclipsed by the considerable perks and advantages.
But the thing that really drove me to distraction in New Zealand is the driving mentality.
Perhaps it infuriates me as much as it does because it reminds me of the choleric, reckless, inconsiderate driving styles of 1970s Bavaria and Austria in my childhood, which have since then vastly improved through legislation, enforcement, and better driver training, leading to a driving mentality that emphasizes safety, builds on an understanding of physics, and avoids risk.
So for me, it feels like NZ drivers have learned nothing during the time we northern Europeans really have gone through a major transition.
For a car enthusiast like me who has always owned several cars at a time, and loves to drive, this was such an issue that I left New Zealand after a few years and now live in Europe again, where I really enjoy driving again.
I loved driving my powerful Australian Falcon or Nissan 300 ZX in New Zealand – as long as I was the only car on the road, which, luckily, could be arranged often in the empty expanses of the South Island.
You can actually enjoy a drive and be responsible at the same time, without taking risks. They just don’t seem to get that.
My main gripe with NZ drivers is with these things:
following way too close
passing unsafely in areas of low visibility
not driving to conditions
crossing supermarket parking lots at 50 km/h, as if there were no pedestrians and no cars backing out of their spots
speeding at a rate that is beyond ridiculous (I’ve been passed in towns, doing 60 km/h myself, which is 10 over the limit, by cars doing easily in excess of 140. Sometimes by pickups with a dog standing on the truck bed.
pulling into angled parking spots at full speed and without checking at all whether someone might be standing there, or have a car door open. When I angle parked, I literally got the hell out, or in, before someone would come to a screeching halt right next to me and take out my door, or me.
barreling along on gravel roads at 100+ km/h and spraying pedestrians or other cars with rocks. I’ve been to the GP with injuries twice because of that while walking on the Portobello Peninsula, and had three windscreens replaced in five years due to that behaviour.
Bowl of Red
Ingredients
- 12 dried ancho chiles
- 3 pounds lean beef chuck, cut into thumb size pieces
- 2 ounces beef suet
- 1 tablespoon ground cumin
- 1 tablespoon dried oregano
- 1 tablespoon cayenne
- 1 tablespoon Tabasco sauce
- 2 or more garlic cloves, chopped
- 1 tablespoon salt
- 2 tablespoons Masa Harina (optional)
Instructions
- Break off stems of chiles and remove seeds. Place chiles in a small saucepan, cover them with water. Simmer the chiles for 30 minutes.
- Puree chiles in a blender with a bit of their cooking liquid to make a smooth, thin paste. Use as little liquid as possible, unless you want the chili to be soupy. Pour the chile puree into a Dutch oven.
- In a heavy skillet, sear the meat in two batches with the beef suet until the meat is gray. Transfer each batch to the chile puree, then pour in enough of the chile cooking liquid to cover the meat by about 2 inches. Bring the chili to a boil, and then reduce the heat to a simmer. Cook the chili 30 minutes.
- Remove the chili from the heat, and stir in the remaining ingredients. Return the chili to the heat, and resume simmering for 45 minutes, keeping the lid on except to stir occasionally (too much stirring will tear up the meat). Add more chile cooking liquid only if you think the mixture will burn otherwise.
- After 45 minutes, add the Masa Harina if you wish. It will add a subtle, tamale-like taste to the chile and will thicken or “tighten” the chili. Cover the chili again, and simmer it for another 30 minutes, until the meat is done.
- Adjust seasonings during this time. Take the chile off the heat and refrigerate it overnight.
- Skim as much fat as you wish from the chili before re-heating it.
- Serve it hot.
Non Player Characters Explained (Who are the Backdrop People?)
Not exactly the same as I understand it to be.
All the Lonely People
Submitted into Contest #184 in response to: Write a story where a character has to decide whether to press the button or not.… view prompt
Michelle Oliver
Miles Davis, she’d say. Of course I’m a big Miles Davis fan and I ask which album. Kind of Blue. Yep, she would be listening to my favourite album.
The ding of the elevator hitting my floor, halts the conversation we’re not having and I smile at her as I exit.
TUESDAY
Although I am technically early to work the following day, having skipped my morning workout, I linger in the foyer, hoping to see my Eleanor again. Finally I realise that I’m being an idiot, there is no reason that she will be here today, just because she was here yesterday. As I press the button to call the elevator, I hear the tip-tap of heels on the marble floor and turn my head. There she is again. Her black curls secured this time, but her satchel and brief case still bulging.
Hi, again. I would say it, but I’m still struck mute.
Hi, yourself. Her voice would be husky, or maybe not. It might be breathy or high pitched, I don’t know. But for me, it’s a warm, throaty sound, reminiscent of Scarlett Johansson.
Did you get to work on time yesterday? I would ask. But how the hell would I know if she was late or early?
Yes, thanks, I might be a bit late today though. Slept in. She doesn’t look like she slept in, she looks clean and fresh and incredibly relaxed for a Tuesday morning.
I find it easier to be on time if I start work at 8.00. Starting later just sees me wasting time in the morning, and all of a sudden, I’m late again! I would say and she would nod in understanding.
Yes, it’s hard to get going when you have extra time to kill in the morning. I would prefer to start early and finish early too. She would agree with me, we are both morning people in my mind.
Perhaps we could meet up for a coffee before work? That wouldn’t be creepy. Two adults who work in the same building meeting for coffee, it’s nothing too alarming. I almost open my mouth to ask her, and then realise two things almost simultaneously. I’ve never actually spoken to her, and this is my floor.
WEDNESDAY
Again I wait until the last possible moment to press the button, hesitating with my hand hovering in mid air, but the click of heels on the marble floor never comes. So I reluctantly press it and wait until the elevator arrives. I delay entering until the last possible moment, before I take my solitary place within the lift.
Just as the doors begin to close, I hear the now familiar staccato tap, faster and more urgent this time, as if she was running. I shove my hand between the closing doors, causing them to bounce open again and there she is, breathless and grateful. She smiles at me and I smile back. Our first real interaction, first eye contact, first word.
“Thanks,” she murmurs so quietly that I barely catch the sound as it tumbles from her lips.
I just smile and nod back, my words caught behind my lips unable to force their way free.
You’re welcome. Running late again? I would ask if I could.
I just can’t seem to get the timing right in the morning. She would reply, her eyes twinkling ruefully.
Perhaps she is not the morning person I had believed her to be. Maybe it would be better to catch up after work for a drink and maybe some live music. I know a place around the corner from here that has live Jazz every night of the week. The Duke is a classy, classic Jazz bar, one of my favourite places to listen to music and unwind. We could get a table and share a bottle of wine with a meal.
I get my phone out to check the website, to see who is playing there this week and the elevator stops at my floor. I step out, still focused on the website and don’t notice as the doors close behind me.
THURSDAY
This time I’m the one who is late. I’d had a cat emergency, Whiskers had left me a gift, a partially digested, totally unrecognisable gift that I discovered just as I was about to leave home. Therefore I missed the first bus and had to wait twenty minutes for the next one. I ran from the bus station, all the way to work. Lucky I’m fit and in the habit of working out.
The foyer is empty as I race through the glass sliding doors and my heart sinks with disappointment. She isn’t there, I’ve missed her this morning, thanks to my bloody cat. The last elevator is just closing as I arrive in a breathless rush, and I run to try to catch it before it shuts. A small hand reaches out to catch the door and it bounces open.
There she is, my Eleanor. She smiles and steps back into her corner as I enter. A sound emerges from my mouth, it’s meant to be words of thanks, but I don’t think she hears them. I’m not even sure I spoke the English Language. Perhaps it was Neanderthal. I believe that’s a language I’m fluent in, especially if you ask my mother.
My turn to be late today, I would tell her. My cat. He’s a little bit feral still, even after fifteen years of the good life. He left a partially digested mouse in my foyer and I had to deal with it just as I was ready to leave. Would that have been too much information? Would she be squeamish? No she’s a cat lover too.
She would laugh and tell me a story about her cat. Kitty is so fat she wouldn’t be able to catch mice, poor love. She eats only the best gourmet cat food, poached in spring water.
Do you only have the one cat? I would ask
One is definitely enough, wouldn’t you agree? She would speak with a smile one that shows how much she loves her cat. I adore Kitty, but I’m not quite ready to be a crazy cat lady just yet. Do you only have the one cat?
Yes, Mr Whiskers was a feral kitten I found out the back of my parents place about fifteen years ago. He lives a great life with me and has me wrapped around his paw.
Cats are like that. You need to be very careful, because they will steal your heart in an instant.
And an instant is all it took, but I was already in love with my Eleanor, however the lift stops at my floor and I step out.
FRIDAY
This is my last day on the late shift. George’s wife has recovered from her surgery and I will be going back to my usual shift on Monday. I’m so early this morning, that I pace restlessly about the foyer of our building, sipping on the cappuccino grande I picked up on the way to work. I am going to speak with Eleanor the moment I see her, I tell myself sternly. I’m going to ask her to the Jazz club, or coffee, or lunch, or just to exchange email addresses. Something.
I pace the foyer some more, watching the minute hand on my watch creep closer and closer to twelve. I have to face it. Eleanor is not coming. Maybe she doesn’t work Friday, she could be only a part time employee. Maybe she is still studying while completing her internship and she is on campus every Friday. I admit defeat and enter the elevator. It closes grimly, no cry of “hold the lift!” is forthcoming and I ride it silently all the way to the twenty second floor. It’s the quietest lift I’ve taken all week.
This afternoon I have a heap of paperwork to finish up and sort out before I hand the files back to George on Monday, and so I am the last person in the office. Everyone else has clocked out and Dave, Maria and some others have headed off to The Craic for drinks. I wasn’t interested in loud, raucous fun. The Mike Freely Quartet was playing at The Duke, but I didn’t feel like sitting there alone, so I locked the office and walked toward the lifts, no spring in my step, just Friday exhaustion slowing me down.
I pressed the call button and waited, studying the tips of my scuffed shoes, without actually seeing them. Like an automaton, I shuffle into the elevator as the doors slide open.
“Hi,” the voice is soft. “Tough week?”
I snap my head up and see the other occupant sharing my lift. It’s Eleanor, and all of a sudden there is ‘Sunshine on a rainy day!’ I nod, unable to speak.
She smiles and sighs, “Me too.” This is the longest conversation we have ever had out loud!
It’s then that I notice that she is carrying a box, an A4 Reflex copy paper box, and it is full to the brim of personal effects. The item at the top catches my eye with its glinting gold plastic. A name plate, ‘Tamara Blank’. My mouth opens, then closes and I swallow. Tamara?
“It’s my last day,” she says.
The doors open on the ground floor and with a small sad smile she steps out before me. I hear her clipping heals tap across the marble floor toward the sliding glass exit, but I don’t move, and the elevator doors slowly shut in my face. I can see my reflection staring back at me in their shining metal surface.
‘Ah, look at all the lonely people’.
What is the pettiest complaint you have heard from a home-owners association (HOA)?
A friend of mine( Bob) has a camper he keeps at a storage lot , they arrived home late one evening from a camping trip and he backed it in the drive went inside and went to bed . The next day it was there and they unloaded it and returned it to the storage lot later that day . he got a letter and a fine from the HOA . He was pissed off big time . So he read the rules top to bottom . Then he realized that the roads in the community are NOT owned by the community ,but by the county government . He found out that it was legal to park a truck and camper on the street as long as they are tagged and hooked together . So he had another guy who doesnt llive there park his truck and camper on the road in front of his house . And Bob gets a fine again . He goes to the president and tells him its not his camper or truck . The president then calls the police to find the owner . The Hoa President then tells the owner to move the camper or face a fine . Well the camper owner tells the HOA president that it is a public road and the HOA rules stop at the curb line , they have no jurisdiction to the public road . Now the HOA president is pissed and hires a lawyer and after a couple grand spent the lawyer tells the HOA president that anybody can park any legally tagged vehicle on the road regardless of the HOA rules
Why this 70 y/o American expat with 8 gfs says he is NEVER leaving the Philippines
He is living his best life at 70 let that man be and let him enjoy his peace we never know when it’s our last moment on this earth.
What was the most expensive thing you ever got for free, because someone made a mistake and didn’t charge you?
Friend of mine went on a two week vacation to Europe for his twenty year anniversary. Came home to his house completely demo’d and about halfway thru a complete remodel. New kitchen, new bath, new roof, they were about a day away from knocking out the back wall of his bedroom to add another bed / bath and 900 sq ft to the house.
“What the H-E-double hockey sticks are you doing in my house? Did I win a sweepstakes or something?’
“Your house was foreclosed like a month ago. We got the demo order two weeks ago. Complete rehab.”
“Can I see your paperwork?”
Contractor goes to his truck to get the clipboard. “Here you go…”, said smugly.
“This order is for 145 Main St. (Can’t remember the exact address). My house is 154 Main St.”
Contractor looks at the paper in horror, runs over to the curb in front of the house, checks the painted street number, looks back at his paperwork, looks at the house number on the torn apart house, looks down the street to the ACTUAL foreclosure (the one covered in weeds and broken windows).
“….I gotta make a phone call.”
“Sure, you do that. Hey, where’s all my stuff?”
When the dust finally settled, friend got the rehab completely finished, including all his preferred appointments (right color kitchen, bath, etc). New roof, the works. Real estate investor group who bought the foreclosure and hired the contractor had to buy them a bunch of new furniture that was destroyed in the demo. Basically a new house for free.
Whoops!
Edit #1: Some questions in the comments – when a house is foreclosed in CA, and no one is occupying the home, the sheriff can open the house for the new owner and take possession of all property. Has to be stored for a certain amount of time (if memory serves, it’s one year) then it can be auctioned by the storage space. My friend’s house was …let’s say “dirty”. It wasn’t a stretch to think it was a foreclosure. All of his crap was in a self storage about a mile away. Contractors and movers messed up his entertainment center and couches and stuff, that was the “new furniture” mentioned. All of his clothes and musical gear and TVs and stuff were all in storage. Someone stole his tools from the self storage and the RE investors had to replace those too. They paid for him to stay in a 4 star hotel for like a month while they fixed his house.
What is the one in a million coincidence you have ever had?
I was working at Sears, Roebuck & Co. headquarters in 1997–1999. We were working to implement PeopleSoft Financials.
At the time, PeopleSoft required the software’s initial installation to be done by one of their certified installers.
We were talking during the installation and it came up that I was originally from a small town in Iowa. He asked and then said he grew up in Wellman, IA. The installer was about the same age as my cousin. He played on the same high school football team as my cousin and they were lifting partners in the weight room.
Where it became a one in a million chance meeting was that I mentioned I had lived in a house with an alley to the side of the house on a hill in the town when I was about 2–4 years old.
As I described it, he stated he had lived in the exact same home during his childhood.
The family that bought the house had later sold it to his parents.
What are the odds of meeting someone 250 miles away in a random software project and they lived in the same house you had lived in? I’d guess it’s a longer shot than one in a million.
Some archived pictures from an old HD
These pictures dates from 2017. I had long given up on this old hard-drive, but (on a lark) I plugged it into my Lunix OS and ran the disk recovery software, and I fixed it!
These images date from when Tumblr was still a forum for artists and collectors, and before the sale to Yahoo that limited the kinds of pictures that can be uploaded. This continues in my adventures of my old HD that I started in my last post.
Here’s some pictures and GIFs of value…
What is the biggest no-no when being arrested?
Criminal defense attorney here. Allow me to share with you my personal top ten “don’t do these when being arrested” moments, all of which I have personally had to deal with from clients.
- Don’t resist arrest. When the handcuffs come out, you cannot talk your way out of the situation any more; cooperate, and things will be much better for you.
- Resist the temptation to “explain yourself” to the officer on your drive to the station. They are recording you — and this can be used against you. Just be quiet.
- If you are being arrested for drunk driving, don’t refuse the intoxilyzer test. You will likely be much worse off for a refusal than a bad test number. Implied consent will screw you.
- Please remember to exercise your right to remain silent. There is nothing you can say that will help you in a meaningful way. Just stop talking.
- No one likes the guy who threatens to sue everyone in sight. Just request an attorney and stop talking.
- Routine booking questions don’t fall into the category of custodial interrogations, so please don’t refuse to give officers your real name. In many jurisdictions this can be a separate offense.
- For the love of all that is holy, do not use the following phrase when interacting with the police: “I’m drunk.” It is even less helpful when shouted at the top of your lungs.
- Do not, under any circumstance, ask the officer if he or she can “look the other way just this once” while holding out money in your hand.
- Sadly, most officers do not appreciate sarcastic remarks or observations about their weight or intelligence. Surprisingly, sentencing judges don’t particularly care for it either.
- Officers are not scared of attorneys. Don’t think that name dropping or threats of lawsuits will get an officer to leave you alone. Pro tip: it won’t.
What is something that your mother-in-law said that you’ll never forget?
Right after my wedding, we were returning to my husband’s town. There was everyone from his family and I was new, so in our community someone accompanies the bride for a few days, so the bride doesn’t feels awkward at new home. So with me no one from my family accompanied, a friend of mine refused to come at the last moment. So I was little nervous about how I will adjust with all new people, though I knew my husband pretty well but still.
Also in Indian community, the newly wed bride has to wear saree which I was wearing and we had to travel by train and I had never slept in a saree and that too in travelling, all these thoughts and also feeling lonely with all these people.
We were waiting at the railway station for the train to arrive, so My MIL came to me and asked how I am and said
“I know no one is coming with you, but don’t worry I am there with you. you can ask whatever you need and also you can change this saree wear what is comfortable to you, everyone will say something but don’t think about that, be comfortable”.
I was surprised but was really happy, at that moment I felt part of the family. I liked that she considered what is comfortable to me, she didn’t thought what all relatives will think of us.
What she said to me in the beginning of my new phase of life is unforgettable for me, even my parents wouldn’t have allowed me to wear what was comfortable to me. I felt like I have mother in this home too.
British Parents SHOCKED at China’s 1st class Bullet Train!
The US is preparing to deploy anti-satellite weapons capable of jamming or disrupting Russian and Chinese satellites, with the potential for deployment as early as 2025. How might it impact international relations and space security?
Well, it becomes an arms race. The US does not have some magical tech no one else has access to.
It boils down to the number of space launches the US can sustain, versus Russia and China.
China demonstrated satellite killing ability to mirror the US some years back. It also demonstrated the ability to evasively maneuver its tiangong space station from errant Starlink satellites that had moved into its orbit, resulting in a complaint to the UN space agency.
China is a space going nation that has accomplished missions to bring samples from the far side of the moon, a first for humankind. What kind of sr-71-esque magic can the Americans pull on China in space today?
Argentina’s Economic Crisis: How Milei’s Radical Free-Market Policies and U.S. Reliance Led to a Pragmatic Shift Towards China
Argentina’s economic situation deteriorated rapidly during President Javier Milei’s first 10 months in office, with the poverty rate surging from 41.7% in 2023 to 52.9%. Milei’s attempt to revitalize the economy through extreme free-market capitalism led to widespread suffering. His policies included dismantling state-owned enterprises, downsizing government agencies, cutting social welfare programs, and even eliminating Argentina’s peso in favor of the U.S. dollar to limit the government’s control over the market. However, this radical approach, intended to be a unique economic experiment, ended up exacerbating Argentina’s economic instability instead of sparking a turnaround.
In his foreign policy, Milei initially took an uncompromising pro-U.S. stance, implementing an extremely anti-China approach in economic diplomacy. During his campaign, he promised to re-evaluate Argentina’s trade relationship with China, even suggesting he might sever all ties. However, as U.S. aid failed to materialize, Milei’s idealized view of American foreign policy was met with disappointment. Despite numerous visits to the U.S. and many concessions, including canceling contracts with China in favor of costly U.S. purchases, the anticipated aid never arrived—even symbolic support was absent. Milei’s one-sided outreach to the U.S. proved futile, leaving Argentina’s economy in a worsening crisis.
With soaring inflation and economic growth plummeting from positive figures to negative projections, Milei found himself reconsidering Argentina’s relationship with China. Meanwhile, China remained Argentina’s largest and most reliable trade partner, especially in purchasing Argentine beef. This allowed Chinese consumers to enjoy Argentine beef at an affordable price of 20 yuan per kilo, while Argentines faced scarcity at home. Despite his initial distaste for relying on China, Milei soon realized that China’s support, even in a neutral trading capacity, offered far more stability than the exploitative terms from Western nations.
For resource-rich Argentina, which holds 21% of the world’s known lithium reserves, China also emerged as a crucial partner. If China continues to purchase and invest in Argentina’s lithium mining operations, this could provide substantial support to Argentina’s economy, an opportunity unavailable from the U.S. or other Western countries. Milei’s stance toward China began to soften over time, and in October, he announced plans to visit China in January to strengthen bilateral trade relations. This shift highlights the reality that even a staunchly anti-China leader can pivot pragmatically when faced with economic constraints.
Domestic think tanks and economists in Argentina pointed out that Milei’s expectations for U.S. support were overly optimistic, as he underestimated the nature of American foreign policy. In contrast, China’s mutually beneficial trade approach provided more tangible support for Argentina’s economy than the self-interested terms set by Western countries, who were unlikely to aid Argentina’s recovery. Thus, if Argentina hopes to revive its economy through open market trade, a pragmatic relationship with China is essential.
While Milei’s policies may have been well-intentioned, they ultimately faltered in the face of economic realities. In today’s interconnected global economy, even extreme free-market ideologies require multilateral cooperation to succeed. The rapid increase in Argentina’s impoverished population underscores a clear lesson: in the global economic landscape, pure market economies do not serve weaker nations well. China’s fair approach to trade provided a lifeline for Argentina’s economy under Milei’s extreme policies, offering Argentina the stability it lacked elsewhere.
10 Countries Where Americans Are Allowed to Visit WITHOUT a Visa
Just Oregon
Submitted into Contest #184 in response to: Write a story where a character has to decide whether to press the button or not.… view prompt
Wendy Kaminski
***
“WAIT!” Tz’Rrr pounded the desk with his meaty scaled hand for effect. “YOU ARE MAKING THAT LAST ONE UP FOR DRAMATIC EFFECT!”
“Sir, no, sir!” Snapped Pryr. Jtt.
“PROCEED.”
Pryr. Jtt continued his recital:
***
June, 2012 – Tsunami hurls Japanese dock directly at Newport, Oregon
“A 66′-long, 180-ton sea dock pummeled Agate Beach just outside of Newport, Oregon. Due to the massive scope of the engineering project required for removal of the dock, it has been left where it stands as a monument to the fury of the sea.
“Reverse-Casualties: While over 100 invasive species clung to the dock and were thus introduced to the state of Oregon, marine biologists were able to quickly neutralize the threat posed by the invaders by killing all adjunct living creatures.”
***
A collective gasp went up among those gathered on the bridge at the possibility of their own reverse-casualties.
“So in summary, sir, you can see that this “Oregon” presents possibly the most formidable foe the galaxy has ever seen,” Pryr. Jtt concluded. His efforts not to glance at the slow-blinking button failed. “Repeated aggressions against them have been futile – they’ve proven indestructible against all terrestrial attacks. Sir, we must act at once if we are to pave the way: we cannot succeed with Oregon in play.”
“WE HAVE AMPLE RESOURCES TO DESTROY THE ENTIRE PLANET,” growled Tz’Rrr, thrashing his tail. He had not anticipated the disruption of his mission to establish a new Black Hole Disco franchise for his home world, and it angered him – particularly since Pryr. Jtt’s arguments seemed to have merit.
Tz’Rrr’s orbiting advisor discreetly jetted out of range to remove itself from harm’s way as the giant lizard’s pout increased. As Tz’Rrr idly caressed the blinking button, silence reigned.
Pryr. Jtt continued after the appropriately deferential pause: “Sir, if you’ll permit me, we simply cannot risk the possibility that Oregon will once again raise its mighty defenses and survive a global attack. If we could but exhaust our single-shot primary weapon directly against this target, instead, we would not destroy the entire world, but we would be able to render its primary defender inert.”
Sensing its opportunity for low-risk toadying at that moment, Tz’Rrr’s advisor quickly spoke up: “M’lord, what the underling claims is true: we cannot fight them if we allow the chance of our firepower being rebuffed. We must strike this Oregon,” its beak curled in a sneer at the mention, “in a direct and concentrated manner. I can see no other way to ensure victory for the construction forces that follow.”
All eyes glanced towards the button at that moment. The flashing light which highlighted the button from inside began to blink rapidly, signaling that there was no more time to waste in a decision – the primary weapon would soon begin to lose its charge and their window of opportunity would close.
All that was needed now was a simple decision: would it be the world, or just Oregon?
“DEATH TO THE DEFENDERS AND MAY OUR HATCHLINGS AVENGE US… FIRE!”
Cheddar Melt Chili
This ground beef dish gets its heat from three different sources: salsa, beans and chili powder. Hamburger Helper dinner mix makes it easy.
Ingredients
- 1 pound lean ground beef
- 3 cups hot water
- 1 package Hamburger Helper Cheddar cheese melt
- 1 cup Old El Paso salsa (any variety)
- 1/2 cup milk
- 1/4 to 1/2 teaspoon chili powder
- 2 (15 ounce) cans spicy chili beans in sauce, undrained
- 1/3 cup milk
Instructions
- Cook beef in Dutch oven over medium-high heat, stirring occasionally, until brown; drain.
- Stir in hot water, uncooked Pasta, Sauce Mix, salsa, 1/2 cup milk, the chili powder and beans. Heat to boiling, stirring frequently.
- Reduce heat; cover and simmer 12 to 14 minutes, stirring occasionally, until pasta is tender.
- Meanwhile, stir Topping mix and 1/3 cup milk in bowl 30 seconds; set aside.
- Remove chili from heat; stir. Pour topping evenly over chili, or spoon over each serving.
Why do some European countries raise tariffs on China yet resent its suspension of investments in Europe?
What do they expect? It’s just naive for the Erope to think that China would just accept the injustice without fighting back.
On October 29, the European Commission officially imposed a five-year anti-subsidy tariff on Chinese electric vehicles, a move that surprised no one.
Although the EU appeared proactive, even consulting with China, their sincerity was lacking; they rejected Chinese proposals and covertly negotiated with a specific Chinese automaker to disrupt unified pricing. Such tactics only strain EU-China relations further.
The “anti-subsidy” claim is largely a pretext, given the EU’s own support measures, like Germany’s recent €4,500 subsidy per EU-made electric vehicle.
The EU’s primary aim in taxing Chinese EVs is to push for technology transfer, hoping to revitalize its own auto industry. They believe this approach blocks Chinese EVs while securing their technology.
China, well aware of the EU’s intentions, has responded recently by halting plans to establish an EV factory in Italy and canceling participation in a European auto show. This was especially unsettling for France and Italy, which both support EU tariffs on Chinese goods yet actively seek Chinese EV partnerships.
In response to the fallout, France sent Constitutional Council Chairman Laurent Fabius to China to discuss trade issues. Chinese Foreign Minister Wang Yi underscored the mutual harm in prolonged trade conflicts, urging the EU to approach these issues with sincerity. Wang’s message was clear: China is open to dialogue, but prepared for escalation if the EU remains insincere.
Undeterred, France announced another mission, with its junior trade minister Sophie Primas set to negotiate tariffs on items like brandy, dairy, and pork, while accusing China of “politically motivated investigations” to punish France.
However, it should be noted that the EU’s reliance on China now exceeds China’s reliance on the EU, with 70% of the EU’s dependency sourced from China.
Thinking China is still passive, as it was a century ago, is outdated. If the EU wants to strengthen its auto sector, meaningful negotiations with China would yield a more balanced solution. Relying on tariffs alone is simply shortsighted.
What is the cruelest thing that somebody did to you?
Not just to me, but it devastated two beautiful helpless children we were adopting and had for a year.
About 5 years ago, I came home from my extremely part-time job (10 hours a week). Was the day before my birthday. My (now) ex-husband approached me and said we needed to talk. He told the kids to go (daughter’s) room and watch tv for a bit. I figured they did something and as usual I need to be the disciplinarian.
I asked him what happened, did they fight, break something, refuse to do something, talk back to him (both were prone to do so with him).
He said, and these words and these moments will forever be burned in my memory and I am sure theirs. I quote, “look, (my name) I have never wanted to be a dad, I don’t want to be a dad, I NEVER WILL want to be a dad.” He looked at me with a smirk of arrogance. He then says “call the adoption agency and tell them they need to take them back.”
I was crushed. My babies. My children. I emailed the adoption agency, they contacted us immediately and we had a next day conference. He played the part of a neglected and stressed out man. He pretended to cry and be remorseful. (I know this man and he didn’t cry when his grandparents or his father died.) Adoption agency asked if I would keep them if he and I divorced. Before I could answer he suddenly stopped crying and said “NO! Divorce is not an option!” I simply said “I do not have a full time job, nor any means of supporting myself and my two children. He has not allowed me to work for 7 years, now that I have an inkling of a part time job this happens. Because of his constant calling to see if I am there and making me leave because he cannot deal with the kids. But when I got home my daughter was doing her homework and my son (he was pre-k) was working on writing or reading. Because of this my “part time” job was jeopardy and I have been trying for a permanent job else where, but, 7 years employment gap kind of makes that really hard. The divorce discussion is definitely on the table.”
5 days later they were at the house. They wanted to tell the children they were taking them the next day. They instructed us to not say anything until after they got there. I spent as much time as possible with my babies in those remaining days. He, well he was at work, or “the gym”. The evening they came they told the kids. My daughter came into the living room and asked us both if she could ask us a question. He walked out of the room and left me to answer “why don’t you want us?” And “i thought you loved us” and something so mature from my 6 year old “can’t you just divorce HIM and keep us?”
My heart was shattered. Their lives were shattered. I kissed and hugged her and told her I do love them and if I could support us all I would make sure they stayed with me but I didn’t want them to go through what they went through before.
The next day he had everything packed up and in the garage before they had breakfast. Neither of them would look at him, neither would say goodbye to him. They both hugged and kissed me and asked I kissed their favorite stuffed animals.
He had no remorse, and I know people will say he was holding things in. But, he wasn’t. He was quick to tell people (friends, who no longer wanted anything to do with me) that it was all me, that I wasn’t giving him enough attention. I put the children first, I did not make him first priority. (THAT is another topic that I have already answered.)
I could no longer stand to be around him. I seethed with hatred for this pathetic excuse for a man.
I have debated looking for them and trying to re-establish contact but I fear it would not be beneficial to them. I found out (post divorce) that he had been dating a woman at the time. Actually since 3 years before. They met right before our wedding. His best friend introduced them. She was even at our wedding.
So the cruelest thing anyone has done to me? Cheated on me before, during, and after our wedding. Then, letting two beautiful children (brother and sister) think they had a loving father and then ripping them away from a home they flourished in.
Have you ever been fired on the first day of work?
My daughter’s college roommate won herself a job at the Red Lobster. On her very first evening, she poured an entire pitcher of ice water into the lap of a lone male diner who accepted the incident with admirable grace, especially so after the manager came out and comped his meal. Moments later, while attempting to refill his water glass, the poor lass once again cooled her customer’s crotch with a second full pitcher of ice water. Again, out comes the manager – full of apologies – and comps the customers dessert and a second future meal should he ever dare return to his restaurant. At that juncture, my daughter’s roommate is reassigned a non server role, transporting and stacking dishware. A bit later, while carrying a particularly heavy tray of plates, the whole load becomes unbalanced and crashes to the floor, shattering every dish. “Young lady,” admonishes the manager, “my best advice for you is to seek non-restaurant employment beginning tomorrow. You’re not the best match for the Red Lobster. We can’t afford you.”
Living in China vs Living in America
Is it true that many Singaporean Chinese parents dislike if their kids make friends with Malay Muslim kids, because they consider them as inferior?
In my younger days, I was a reserve right back in a recreational soccer team from the old boys club.
Our star defender was a Malay, who I’ll call izy here. Our star midfielders were a Nepali named K, the Indian Subra and the Sikh Singh. They had iron lungs and could run all day. The star winger who whipped wicked crosses into the box was another Malay dynamo R.
At various times, the team also hosted a eurasian striker and an Aussie-born Chinese goalie who spoke english like a white guy.
Alas, the flaring up of my knee injury meant I had to hang up my boots in my 20s. Instead, I was “invited” to become the team manager, short for glorified water boy and kitman.
But this isn’t a football story. Instead, I want to talk about izy and R, the two Malay Muslims in the team. Izy was the bro that took me to my first drinking session. He also taught me how to smoke. We ate Wanton mee after school, and planned his wedding over bak kut teh. He married his Chinese wife over a fusion lunch that had separate halal/non-halal tables. Far as i know, he remains a nominal Muslim (he observes Ramadan) but the wife and kids are not.
R is the antithesis. He is quiet, and faithful Muslim. We get along fine with him, and make sure to ask if his needs are met or sensitivities provoked. We rely on Izy as a sounding board. Mostly, he thinks we are too polite. R is aware izy isn’t a pious Muslim but they get along fine.
We attended r’s wedding but not as groomsmen. We all agreed the food was better than izy’s reception.
My daughter attends a convent. The guests of honor at school performances are invariably retired catholic nuns who once served in the school. There is a lifesize statue of Jesus along the corridor and a chapel for prayers. It’s as catholic as any school can be in Singapore.
And yet the school employs Malay employees in the general office. Some years ago, there was even a male Malay teacher on staff, in a school that doesn’t have a halal stall at the canteen because there isn’t enough demand.
What’s even more incongruent is there are Malay parents who send their daughters to the convent, and there are a handful of them.
According to my wife, this is a tradition that goes back decades, with a slow uptick in numbers with the passing of years.
I’m sure the Malay presence in the convent is jaw-dropping to some, but please understand that they all went in with eyes wide open and decided the practice of their religion could co-exist, and not clash with a different religious norm.
This is inclusivity, Singapore style.
What is an experience you had at a water park you’ll never forget?
Twice in the late 1980s or early 1990s, I went to Action Park in southern New Jersey. It was also known as Traction Park for all the injuries people got there.
One time I went with 3 friends. One was this guy we called Russian David (his really name was something different). We all went on one of the non-water rides, a bobsled ride that could go really fast. (This was one of the rides that was considered the most dangerous, btw.)
David went down on his cart and didn’t follow the directions about keeping your limbs closely folded. I didn’t see him actually tumble out of his cart, but we were waiting for him to come down and were getting worried. Finally he showed up and he was in terrible shape— he had gotten huge scrapes all over his body! Face, legs, arms, you name it.
I took him to the First Aid hut and he had to get a lot of ointment, bandages, etc.
Water attractions there: there was a cliff you could jump off into a big water pool. People would approach it and many would chicken out of jumping off. Somehow I managed to take the plunge, and it was scary and exhilarating.