A collection of really eye-popping articles and stories from 1950s and 60s Men’s pulp magazines

Ah, they don’t write stories like they used to.

I once read an article. It’s maybe six years ago that said that SJW types were scouring old used bookstores for “sexist” and “racist” books. Buying them up in huge lots and burning them, and generally trashing them outright.

I don’t know if it was true or not.

I certainly hope not.

What I do know is that my brother told me that when he visits the used books stores, he simply cannot find science fiction anthologies or collections of short stories anywhere. He said that he visited perhaps fifteen stores in the Colorado region and none could be had.

It would be a shame to see my boyhood erased simply becuase some bight-eyed utopian wanted to make the world better though tyranny.

Sigh.

But that’s the United States today. The internet is a corporate-technologist controlled dictatorship-based white-board. Things pop up, and then are erased as new narratives take hold, develop, conduct their purposes and then die.

Then new narratives materialize.

Now, it’s Ukraine. It was Coronavirus. Before that it was China. Before that was 5G radiation, before that was…

I need a beer.

By the way. You do know that beer goes great with steaks, meats, potatoes, and all sort of fine delicious and tasty foods. How about a fine, fine pot roast, eh?

It’s an old clichéd joke to say you read adult magazines for the articles. However, if you’re talking about men’s mags from the 1950s and 60s, there might actually be some truth in your statement.

Magazines like Playboy, Adam, Jem, and Rogue often featured genuinely well-written articles and short fiction.

Getting published in a men’s magazine wasn’t the shameful smudge on an author’s reputation as it is today – in fact, it was a common stepping stone for soon-to-be-famous authors.

Like Ray Bradbury.

But it isn’t just the stories that deserve respect – it’s the artwork that complimented them. Often sleazy and purposefully outrageous, the illustrations were designed to entice you to read the story in a not-so-subtle way.

Here in this article, we are going to present some most excellent examples. Grab some snacks, pour a large bowl with potato chips, get some nice dip, and start reading.

Oh, and don’t forget a tall frosty glass of beer. Or, if you are like MM, a fine bottle of wine , and share with your beloved pet.

Have fun.

Be with your kitties.

I mean, more like this…

Let’s begin our fun adventure…

They were two drunken lovers having an affair in her bed while her husband was away. But, was he away? Wasn’t that he – respected adviser to the President – they now overheard plotting to kill the man in the White House?

Lured by his smoldering eyes and magnetic personality, adoring women flocked to Rasputin. Peasant girls, prostitutes, princesses – they came, they saw, and they were conquered!

We got home about midnight. Shelia, the sitter, lay fast asleep on the couch. Maria woke her. Then I drove her home… an hour later, she’d been raped and strangled – and I was suspect number one!

Getting Avis pregnant, and other sinful shenanigans, proved that the passionate pastor simply didn’t practice what he preached…. it finally took the electric chair to deliver him from all evil.

As the whistling whip snaked across her back, the young woman writhed in pleasure. For this was the joy that she’d paid to feel and relish.

I could hear Ted’s screams, but I couldn’t get to him, the bull sea lions were surrounding me and the angry sea was at my back…

With a 2,000-horse-soldier combat team, the mad Russian set out to take all Asia for a harem. And he would have made it if he hadn’t touched the man millions call God.

The Sewer rats are the only ones you’ll share your secret with.

The couple’s honeymoon yacht turned into a craft of horrors when it was boarded by a lust-crazed psychopath who butchered anyone who dared invade his private inlet.

Big blondes in dime-store dresses, tender teenagers with eager smiles, they converge in front of fancy bars and good hotels in all the big towns bordering the hill country.

According to one automotive expert, these prestige-heavy imported hot rods are often badly made, unsafe, cash-eating tin cans perfectly designed for carrying you to the morgue.

A wanton, lush-bodied kitten of a blonde, she gave Mike Webster the sweetest, most loving hideout any murderer-on-the-run ever had.

Housemaids, heiresses, coeds and countesses – this brawling blackmailer sampled them all on a 75-year love binge so bawdy his memoirs still can’t be printed…

In life, she was a nymphomaniac with a very high taste in jewels and men. In death, she was Mike Shayne’s fourty-first murder case.

Laos was in flames, and in that bloody, steaming jungle hid a broken and dying pilot guarding a cargo the Reds would give their birthright to get…

In the waning days of world war two, Germany was in a state of utter collapse and chaos.

Angel terror across Dixie… Girl Rage Rampage!

In the grim violence of the Mate Grosso, two lusting men and two equally desire lashed females were stripped of all defenses before the furious onslaught of body-snatching banditoes…

…!

Jack Murphy primed her talents and showed her to the right people, all the while sating his desires on the sensuous blonde’s promise of passionate reward.

Roaring out of the back alleys of Los Angles on their souped-up hogs, four piston-fast “leather jacket looters” and their “desire debs” hatched a plot for the greatest armored truck robbery ever attempted.

…she didn’t even have time to…

A tough yank enforcer, two revenge-hungry nymphs vs. a crazed murder genius.

An Englishman who produced a .30 caliber carbine compact enough to fit in a cigarette pack…

Everyone in the third-floor room tried to laugh off what was happening to the girl on the bed – everyone but her boyfriend and the doctor, who found more in her stomach than just milk and cookies.

…he turned an island into a cross between Fort Knox and the sexiest Siegfried line ever built.

Those oriental Nazi dancing girls were all they were supposed to be… and more.

A murderer at the age of eleven, Ben Hogan led a life of crime and depravity that had no equal outside of Hell.

Blood was dripping from his slavering fangs…

With a bleching sound, the torrent gushed into the street. For tipplers it was a perfect way to die. For others it was an unheard of death.

…his wrist and ankles manacled to a steel bed.

Women, whiskey and dope made the Japanese town of Chitose “the wickedest city in the far east”.

They pumped two bullets into Al Cooke and left him for dead, but he wasn’t ready for the grave yet… not until he could get the laust laugh.

he was determined to even an old score. But the grim climax with the giant tusker was unexpected.

The trappers poured into camp hunting for their week of women…

Murderous females who were armed to the teeth tricked Fred hardin into stopping his car for them. Then, by threatening to slit the throat of his wife on a moment’s notice, forced him to accompany them on a journey through Hell.

To save his mate from a fate worse than death, the incredibly swift cat invaded a camp swarming with professional hunters, ready to kill or be killed if necessary…

Brother Briggs’s 3,300,00 members game kept his desert empire polygamy  happy until the day the disciples caught on to the reason behind the leaders 9-1 ratio.

The Reds were bleeding the West of vital defense secrets. And even after a seven-year manhunt, counterintelligence had only one clue – a case of nylon undies.

“Being a Lady of the Night in jolly old London is never easy – but when somebody wants to carve you up, it’s sheer murder”

“He writhed in agony as they tore at his wife’s clothing… Dan’s car was the only weapon which could avenge their heinous crime.”

“Trapped by the mafia’s maniacal sadist, Garry had only one chance to save himself and the woman he loved”….And by the looks of things, Garry had damn well better hurry up!

“Reilly was doomed to a life without women – unless he could force the leprechaun to lift its double-whammy”

Possibly my favorite of all time.

One moment of frenzied passion could destroy his only chance for a perfect future.

“The telephone had killed his wife – and the telephone offered the perfect revenge”

Until he saw with his own eyes, the refused to believe a United Nations report -40,000 girls to be kidnapped this year in Europe and Africa and marched across the Sarah for sale to wealthy Arabian harem owners!

In an age of charm and delicacy, Madame Laramie was a demon incarnate.

The gallows beckoned and even Rand’s woman couldn’t save him from the gambler’s double-cross.

One minute you’re there, the next… poof! you’re ashes. Never a dull moment for drinkers.

Threatened with ultimate degradation, Mira became a slave to the strangest of passions.

The farewell party was so wild, he almost missed the journey…

Parker knew he must kill his wife’s lover… but he had one growing problem…

“Was Marie Antoinette a victim of character assassination, or did she diddle?”

“It was no ordinary shipboard romance.  Her bull of a husband was along for the ride.  Yet Allen knew he had to have her”

“Telsa had to save the mission from destruction because of Heroq’s passion to remain a Homo sapien”

As this illustration from 1968 demonstrates, artists were free to stylize their work by the late sixties, rather than stick to the somewhat homogeneous look of the mid-century illustrations.

“With five sex-starved wives to satisfy, a man can have a myriad of problems”

“Dollar for dollar, corpse for corpse, Holmes might have become America’s most successful lady killer – if one pretty doll hadn’t talked out of turn and exposed the most shocking mass murder in history”

“There are so many physiological differences between men and women that it is hard to believe they belong in the same species, says this noted psychologist”

The hang-up on the telephone saved him from getting hung up on the couch.

“The night was cold – and so was his wife. All of which led to Pete Landon’s tantalizing adventure.”

“Telling others what a big make out artist you are could very well help you become one”

All the hush-hush planning for the Allied invasion of Europe almost went out the window of a beautiful Hungarian’s bedroom.

“Iona screamed as Peggy stripped for the two men…. only one desperate gamble could stop the crazed convicts”

With a quick slap of the hand, Joe sent the shake-down artist to the floor.

He was a hostage of the Orient’s most notorious fighting brigade – a band of torture-trained females currently terrorizing the border region of Vietnam.

“If sexy strategist Suzanne had been a general, the South might have won the Civil War”

Broom and Board; a Witches tale.

“Hollywood’s a bad influence”… with the sordid Harvey Weinstein stories in the news of late, a very appropriate title. We’ll end here. Until next time.

Fun huh?

Yes. It was.

Back in the day, these magazines were everywhere. Young guys like myself would take our shoe-shine box and earn a few quarters spit-shing shoes and then use the money for candy and other treats. I used to happily get those comic books that were on this wire revolving display.

This was at the local corner drugstore.

I would ride my bike there, and just leave it outside. There was no crime. And even if someone stole it, the community would easily track down who stole it and bring it back. I’d park my banana-seat, long handlebars, Schwinn bicycle outside and go in. The mesh screen door would slam behind me with this little tiny brass bell ringing as I entered.

At that store was a selection of scant housewares, household good, woman’s cosmetics, and a pharmacy in the back. They always had this counter at the side where you could get a simple hamburger platter, eggs and toast, a milkshake or some other delicious treat. Though, as a boy who only had coins, I would get a soda out of the machine outside.

These small town businesses have largely disappeared in America. The small towns are deserted. Big mega-retailers like Wal-Mart and other enormous “box stores” pretty much devistated the smaller communities. Which is a real shame.

A real shame.

Oh, I’ll bet that you are all wonderign what these strange businesses might look like. Well, they came in many different sizes and shapes. Some were just standard brick storefronts, while others were standalone oeprations.

Here’s a very “modern” small-town drugstore.

And what’s more, there were many, many other establishments in the small towns throughout the United States.

Here’s The Krystal. It’s a “fast food” hamburger “joint” that popped up and existed before McDonald’s acted like “The Borg” and assimulated all of them.

And there were all sorts of establishments to eat.

Most people, having two hour lunches, would eat and then go home and take a nap before returning back to work. In those days, long lunches with naps were the norm.

Here’s a typical restaurant at lunch time.

My father had a routine that he would have a lunch at the tavern across from the mill where he worked, and on Thursdays, he would mosey over to the Barber Shop for a haircut and trip afterwards.

Those were the days.

When I entered the work force, they were busy removing benefits left and right, eventually asking us to dash for a 15 minute drive through burger, and return back to a “Lunch Meeting”. This continued though the 1990s. Eventually they eliminated technnical and engineering / manufacturing work completely.

It wasn’t profitable, they said.

Conclusion

We have to understand what we lost before we can understand what we need to change.

The United States today is in turmoil. This is at every level. But if you want to simplify everything, it’s really easy. Greed and the search for profits over all has bankrupted the nation. It hollowed it out, and destroyed the population and society in the process.

It will change.

But right now, most people have no idea what they lost, so how are they supposed to regain any true and real freedoms?

I’ll tell you what…

Real freedom is going into a Men’s-only Barber Shop, picking up a “Girlie Magazine” while a baseball game plays in the backgound. You light up a cigarette, and inhale it deeply.

Is it sexist? Yes.

Is it racist? I don’t know.

Is it unhealthy? Probably.

But so what? It’s no ones business except yours alone.

Freedom is absolute.

You either have it or you do not.

Bye Bye America. You were a dream; and ideal that was never truly possible.

Do you want more?

I have more posts in my Happiness Index here…

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Articles & Links

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