China is one of the most emblematic and visible practitioners of Progressive-Conservatism, which may seem an odd description given that Communism is described by the West as ultra-radical. 

However, when integrated into the context of Chinese history and its longstanding social-philosophy, it’s actually normative as the past is honored while wading into the future with confidence based on past successes. 

When looked at seriously, China’s policies seek to establish Balance and Harmony globally. 

Containing China makes no sense. Working with China makes a great deal of sense. And the latter path is far easier than that of confrontation. 

A look at the Big Picture shows nations confronting China declining while those cooperating rising.

A while ago my mother’s kid sister (my aunt) was on the dating market, and she was dating various men. After a period of time, she had to choose between two men. Apparently, it was a tough decision.

Ralph. He was a blue-collar carpenter. He was from a traditional Catholic family, and was a “salt of the earth” kind of guy. I really liked him alot. He was honest, a straight-shooter. He was just a all around “good guy”. But he wasn’t wealthy. He was just solidly middle class, with about 11 children.

Sonny. He was a dentist, who branched out and bought up factories and businesses. Turned them around. And then sold them for a profit. He had a daughter, and a large ranch with horses, and a great spread of land.

Well, my aunt decided on Sonny.

Ralph was devastated. I (and my wife at the time) liked him a lot. I haven’t seen him since. He used to help my mother fix and repair stuff at her house. He just did it because he had the talent and the ability. He built her a storage room in the basement and a huge porch in the back.

A few years ago, Sonny and my aunt were having troubles. Apparently he was “too controlling” . Ah. I hate to hear that.

I am of the opinion that if she would have chosen Ralph, she would have been much happier. Maybe not wealthier, but certainly… happier. Sigh.

Today…

Consequences

Are teenagers really that moody and hard to handle like people say they are?

Moody? Yes.

Hard to handle? Only if you make it that way.

It’s all about picking your battles with teens. My oldest is 18 now and has been accepted into a very good college, so we’re pretty much “done” raising her. Now it’s mainly just raising money for her.

But, between the ages of 13–18, there were quite a few times where she did something she knew we didn’t want her to do, or she lied to us, and we let her think we didn’t know. We knew, we just picked our battles, and those didn’t seem like battles worth fighting. Basically, if it was something that put her or her future in danger, we came down on her for it. If it was something that just annoyed us or was rude, we let it slide, sometimes.

For example, we grounded her when her grades started slipping because she was spending too much time with her boyfriend. She was mad, but it worked. Within a week, her grades were back up and she was un-grounded. We also have a rule in the house about not hoarding dirty dishes in the bedrooms, but sometimes I’ll look in her room and see literally 20 dirty dishes. Is it worth making a fuss over, even though she’s being disrespectful and breaking a rule? Nah. I just ask her to bring me the dishes from her room the next time I’m loading the dishwasher. No need to pick a fight.

Our parenting mantra for her was pretty much: “Make sure she doesn’t screw up her future by getting pregnant, doing drugs, or failing school, but otherwise, don’t needlessly rock the boat.”

It all worked out. Assuming she doesn’t go completely insane over the next five months, she’ll be fine.

Chicken Soup with Tortellini
(Pollo in Brodo con Tortellini)

Tortellini Soup

There is nothing, nothing, as comforting as walking into the house after a long day to the wafting aroma of chicken tortellini soup.

Today’s Creamy Chicken Tortellini Soup is a healthified version of a heavier cream-based soup.

I haven’t removed the essential elements that make it special such as tender chicken, hearty cheese tortellini, and even a little cream. I’ve just reduced certain ingredients, so you can feel good about serving this Creamy Chicken Tortellini Soup to your family.

And maybe even having seconds.

Yield: 8 servings

Ingredients

• 1 (3 to 4 pound) broiler-fryer chicken, cut up
• 6 cups water
• 1 stalk celery (with leaves, cut into 1-inch pieces
• 1 medium carrot, cut into 1-inch pieces
• 1 medium onion, cut into fourths
• 2 sprigs parsley
• 1 bay leaf
• 2 1/2 teaspoons salt
• 1 teaspoon black peppercorns
• 1 package commercial fresh tortellini or 20 homemade tortellini
• 2 cups water
• Minced parsley
• Grated Parmesan cheese

Ingredients You Will Need

• DeLallo Extra Virgin Olive Oil
• Large Sweet Onion – peeled and chopped
• Red Bell Pepper – seeded and chopped
• Carrots – sliced
• Minced Garlic Cloves
• Boneless Skinless Chicken Breast  – or bonleess chicken thighs
• Chicken Broth – low sodium chicken broth
• DeLallo Three-Cheese Tortellini Pasta
• Heavy Cream
• Packed Frozen Spinach – or fresh baby spinach leaves
• Fresh Chopped Parsley
• Dried Thyme Leaves – or fresh thyme leaves
• Crushed Red Pepper
•  Salt and Pepper

Instructions

1. Heat chicken, 6 cups water, celery, carrot, onion, 2 sprigs parsley, bay leaf, salt and peppercorns to boiling in Dutch oven; reduce heat. Cover and simmer until thickest pieces of chicken are done, about 45 minutes.
2. Remove chicken from broth; strain broth.
3. Refrigerate chicken and broth separately until cool.
4. Remove chicken from bones and skin. Cut chicken into bite-size pieces; add to broth. Cover and refrigerate.
5. Prepare tortellini. If using commercial tortellini, do not precook.
6. Skim fat from broth. Heat broth and 2 cups water to boiling. Add tortellini. Heat to boiling; reduce heat. Cover and simmer until tortellini are tender, about 30 minutes.
7. Sprinkle each serving with minced parsley.
8. Serve with Parmesan cheese.

How To Make Chicken Tortellini Soup

This Creamy Chicken Tortellini Soup is quick and easy to make, yet offers so much wow-factor, your family will ask for it again and again!

1. Saute. Place a large sauce pot over medium heat. Add the olive oil and chopped onions. Saute for 3 minutes to soften. Then add the chopped bell pepper, carrots, and garlic. Saute another 3 minutes.
2. Simmer. Add whole raw chicken breasts, chicken broth, dried thyme, crushed red pepper, salt, and ground black pepper to the pot. Bring to a boil. Lower the heat a little and simmer for 15 minutes, until the chicken is cooked through. Remove the chicken and place on a cutting board.
3. Cook Pasta. Turn the heat back to medium. With the broth still simmering, stir in the DeLallo Three Cheese Tortellini. Stir well so it doesn’t stick together. Then chop or shred the chicken and place it back in the soup.
4. Cream and Season. Once the tortellini is cooked through, about 10-14 minutes, turn off the heat. Stir in heavy cream, spinach, and parsley. Add a little more cream if desired. Taste, then salt and pepper as needed.

Whoa!

Has anyone ever taken a DNA test and found something completely shocking?

My Mum was 79 when a lady who grew up in the same small town as she made contact and started chatting with her. My Mum said, “I don’t know who this person is, but she seems to know me.” Eventually, this lady said to my mum that she was her half-sister. They organised a DNA test and there was shown to be “a high probability” that they were half-sisters. AncestryDNA has shown that I am related to my Mum’s new half-sister. So after 79 years, her whole ancestry has changed.

The story ended up being that my Mum’s father was unable to have children whilst her mother really wanted one, so the father of this other lady was allowed to produce a child with my Nan, that child being my mother. Apparently, the other family was aware of what had happened but kept it under wraps until my Mum was 79 years old when her half-sister decided to talk to Mum and see if she was a nice person. Having decided she was, she opened up to her regarding the situation.

Biological fact

If China improves or invent something to sink USA aircraft and sell other countries like Iran, will the USA lose power overseas?

China already got that capability.

On 2024/1/8, China praised the commander & crew of Nanchang destroyer.

Nanchang (南昌号) is 10000 tons with the most up-to-date equipment. It started service in 2020. It has sailed to Guam a few times. The latest one was Dec 2023 to accompany the fleet of Liaoning aircraft carrier (辽宁航母).

On 2024/1/8, Chinese CCTV released a video which showed 2 US warships, probably EP-18E, nose-diving towards Nanchang. To intercept Nanchang’s electromagnetic field.

Nanchang left Liaoning fleet & went, alone, closer to US aircraft carrier fleet. It activated its Fire Control Radar & opened the lid of 7 of its many missiles. To counter-intercept the electromagnetic field & to warn USA that the US aircraft carrier fleet has been targeted & can be attacked by Nanchang.

The standoff of Nanchang-US warplanes & warships lasted for 20 days. At the end, US fleet left. … China won the electromagnetic “war” & Nanchang crew was thus praised.

Have you ever seen someone being literally laughed out of a courtroom?

Several years ago, I was in court in North Carolina. At the time, cases were called alphabetically, by last name.

One gentleman, let’s call him Ben Jones (not his name but I can’t remember what it was) was called to face charges for some petty crime or another. The judge hadn’t even heard any evidence when Mr. Jones started cursing the judge, the DA, the bailiff, the clerk and everybody else. When the judge gave him a month in County for contempt, he cursed more. This went on until he ended up with about 6 months in county.

When he was finally removed from the courtroom, Chris Jones (again, not the real name) was called up. He immediately asked for a continuance. When the judge asked why, he said that Mr. Curser was his brother and he didn’t want his behavior to affect his case. Even the judge laughed a little and told the guy not to worry, he could keep an open mind.

The judge smiled at the guy upon his not guilty plea, found him not guilty and told him to tell his brother that he’s a reasonable judge.

Is the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) or the Communist Party of China (CPC) considered more leftist?

It is very hard for people who live in western democracies and are used to a multi-party political system to understand that defining the Party as being either left or right is not applicable in the Chinese context.

I would just say that the Party is strongly pro-development and pro-growth, and is focused on improving the lives of ordinary Chinese and making China into one of, if not the greatest economic power in the world, with a special emphasis on manufacturing and hi-tech. It has been very practical and pragmatic, sometimes adopting socialist policies and sometimes adopting free-market policies. As far as the Party leadership is concerned, it is most important that it works for ordinary Chinese, and does not threaten the leadership role of the Party in Chinese society.

The greatest threats to the Party leadership are internal corruption by Chinese officials; this is why Xi has waged his never-ending war on corruption. He sees corruption as a potential cancer in the system, which undermines the peoples’ faith in the system and Party. In China’s past, corruption has almost always been a major contributor to the fall of Chinese imperial dynasties. The other great threat comes from capitalism going wild, and Chinese worshipping the super-rich as their role models. If this were to happen, materialism would run wild, and Chinese would become superficial materialist people like many South Koreans, who worship billionaires and successful actors and entertainers.

To sum up, modern China is very complex, and describing the Party as leftist or rightist is completely inadequate to describe its real nature.

China’s insane Subway system ( America Jealous)

Former bullied kids, what did your bullies do when they met you as an adult?

I was hitchhiking a ride one day, about ten years after being bullied. A truck passed, slowed down and backed up to where I was.

“Hey Brad! It’s me” I heard from just below the passenger side door, from the person leaning out of view to open it. All the fear of my past washed over me because I recognized that voice. It was the voice of the doom that followed my every move, my tormentor from junior high through the end of high school.

He looked at me through the open door of his truck with a side of him I had never seen before. “It’s ok man. I’m not trying to trick you or anything” he said.

Various scenarios played in my head, none of which made sense for an adult man to think, so I got in the truck. I needed the ride.

“Thanks for stopping” I said.

“I did more to talk to you than give you a ride. I didn’t think I’d ever see you again, but there you were, and now I have the chance.”

The chance at what? I thought. Oh sweet Jesus! Is this guy a serial killer by now? Did all the hate he pummeled my frail body with finally build up to a point that he was now insane? What other reason could there be?

I considered jumping out, but that would certainly kill me. All I could do was wait for his next move.

“I swear I’ve thought about you since I last saw you” he said. “What I did to you was so very wrong. I’m so sorry. I can’t tell you why I did it.”

His voice trailed off into a sob. His shoulders lurched forward in heaves of grief. He had to pull over to maintain control of the vehicle.

We sat in awkward silence on the side of the road.

I held his confession in high regard. It was the first time I saw him as a human being. The fear I felt was displaced by compassion for a person that suffered from the enlightenment of adulthood. I knew then what I needed to do.

“I forgive you, Trickle” (his nickname .) It was akin to evoking the name of Satan himself.

“I don’t go by that name anymore!” he protested angrily.

“What should I call you now? What is your name?” I said, hoping that he knew.

“It’s Paul, just Paul” he said in a soft voice.

“Pleased to meet you, Paul” I said reaching out my hand to shake his.

With that the demon that was “Trickle” was exorcised from both of our lives. All the suffering we endured was cleansed.

We talked for hours and stayed in the truck for the duration. I never saw him again.

I think of him now. I hope that he received my forgiveness, and that his life for the last 30 years since we met that day was free of guilt.

Paul, if you’re reading this I want you to know that I did and still do, forgive you.

What did your boss say to you during a meeting that resulted in you immediately resigning?

Not me but a friend. He is pretty high up in the Cyber Security world and has his own business. He was hired by a company to help them harden their network. So he went in and did his due diligence to understand everything that they had, what their vulnerabilities were, etc. After he had done the due dligence, he designed and wrote up a system that he felt would meet their needs. It is very important to understand that when he does this work, he is specific about what hardware and software that they will need to use. He has it in his contracts with his clients that they must follow his design to the letter or his company will walk away, the client will still be required to pay in full all work done to that point + a portion of the remaining contract, and his company will be released from any and all liability.

He goes into the meeting with his client C Suite. Goes through his presentation and presents his numbers. Immediately, the CFO pulls up a document for a completely different system (different hardware, software, etc) that he feels would be just as adequate and significantly cheaper. My friend explains why he has designed the system and hardware needs to best meet their requirements that they gave him and how that system that the CFO was referring to would not meet their requirements. CFO immediately argues back that they should use this cheaper system and demands that he and his company implement it per the contract. My friend immediately stands up, gathers his documentation, designs, presentations, hardware list and everything from everyone in the meeting and tells the CEO that they have just violated their contract with him and they they have 30 days to pay his company out and that he and his company will not be working for them at any time now or in the future and walks out.

What is a funny story that happened due to language barrier?

About ten years ago, I was on a one-stop flight from Vietnam to Los Angeles. Hanoi – Incheon – LAX.

We were transiting at Incheon airport. We had to do a re-security screening after landing from Hanoi. So, we got in line. An officer was walking back and forth in front of the lines, with a water bottle in his hand above his head, speaking loudly in English, “No water. No fruits.”, to let people know to get rid of all those things from our bags before getting checked.

Suddenly, a middle-aged woman in front of me, walked toward the officer, took the water bottle off of his hand, opened it, drank some water from it, closed the bottle, and gave the bottle back to the officer with her biggest smile. She nodded her head with the officer like she wanted to thank him for offering the water. The officer was surprised and then laughed, but the woman didn’t understand English, I guessed, she kept smiling and got to the screening area.

The screening area had five small tables in a row, each table had an officer. You just had to walk to the table and open your handbag for the officer to take a look, and you were done, pretty quick and simple. One by one. After finished checking a person, the officer raised their hand, “Next!”, so the next person could walk up.

That woman was finished checking, she was walking out when the officer at the next table raised his hand, “Next!”. Suddenly the woman also raised her hand and gave the officer a high-five and the same big smile. Then she walked away.

I still smile every time I remember that trip and that cheerful woman.

Cats!

What happens if a motorist is arrested for DUI only to find out their breathalyzer reading is 0?

One night, while driving home form the Ozzfest, an officer on DUI patrol stopped me for suspicion of DUI (he claimed I was swerving) He made me do the FST bare foot and I passed. He the takes out the breathalyzer and I blew a .008 (I saw the reading as he quickly turned away) and the cop stepped into me, looked me in the EYE and said; “HERE!, IN SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA, the legal limit it .07” I knew he was messing with me so, I just shut up and said; “Oh? I didn’t know”. From there on, I said nothing. He arrested me for suspicion of DUI. I know the limit is .08 but I don’t fight with cops on the side of the road. When I was released, I walked to the tow yard and picked up my truck. When you get stopped for DUI they take your driver’s license (send it to DMV) and give you a number to call with in 10 days.

The next morning I called the DMV. The DMV gave back my license over the phone cause the was no evidence filed. Knowing there was no evidence, I put myself on the court calender so, I could get a copy of my police report. In order to get the police report myself, (without a lawyer), I had to agree to defend myself so, I agreed to defend myself.

The judge calls my name, he pauses… because, he sees that I am defending myself. He says; “Charles are you going to defend yourself?” I reply, “YES SIR!” The judge then says; “DO YOU KNOW WHAT BEN FRANKLIN said about people who defend themselves?” I replied; “YES, YOU DON’T NEED TO HIRE A LAWYER TO GET A POLICE REPORT”. The judge didn’t like my answer but he gave the report reluctantly. The judge gave me my report and I went down the street to have lunch and read the report.

I read through the report and to my amazement, the officer told the truth, that I blew a .008 and the limit was .08. after read the report, I went back to court and found a DA. I tried to get him into the court room so, my case could be dismissed. The DA declined to help me so, I had to return for a hearing.

To make a long story short, trust me its longer….I defended myself the whole way through but it took a dozen appearances (over a year of court dates) before I finally got my case dismissed. KNOW YOUR RIGHTS AND READ THE POLICE REPORT BEFORE YOU AGREE TO ANYTHING.

Have you ever seen your teacher doing something inappropriate in front of the whole class?

I saw neither of the following, but I sure heard about them from the offenders themselves.

I teach in Thailand and have trained teachers in not only methodology but also cultural considerations.

‘Sam’ had been a kindergarten teacher in the U.S. and had often patted kids’ heads when they did well or playfully tugged gently on their hair.

Why he thought that would be ok with adults, I will never understand. Mortified, he came to me, admitting that the students had explained that their heads were considered blessed and asked him to stop touching them. He had apologized profusely.

‘Dan,’ on the other hand, was stubborn in the belief that he owed no one an apology. A class represenative had asked a Thai Academic Office staff member to tell ‘Mr. Dan’ to stop putting his feet up on the teacher’s desk and on empty student chairs.

When she explained to ‘Dan’ that feet are considered ‘dirty’ as the lowest point of the body and should not be placed on furniture that others use nor pointed aggressively at others, ‘Dan’ scoffed and walked away.

The Assistant Academic Director then got involved, and ‘Dan’ grudgingly apologized to his class who accepted it but because of his tone, saw him as disrespectful of Thai culture.

‘Mr. Dan’ complained about the ‘ridiculous’ custom to anyone who would listen. Most (including me) reminded him that he is a guest here and should abide by Thai ways.

Note: If paper currency goes skittering, do NOT put your foot on it because it can be considered lese majeste since money carries the image of the king. A fine or even jail time may be involved.

Woman Adopted 11-yr-old Cat. What She Did Next Shocked The Shelter Staff!

What’s the scariest thing that happened when you were in a vulnerable position?

It all started with good intentions.

It was part of an initiative that I began 10 years back, my goal to slowly acquire skills to fix things myself so that I wasn’t constantly having to hire people to fix things.

I was under my car laying on my back sorta like this.

I don’t remember precisely the problem with the car. But I do remember it was night time and I had a small flashlight.

I didn’t have the equipment to lift the truck up properly, so I’d just slowly and carefully wiggled my way under there.

It was a tight squeeze. Very tight.

I felt like Bishop in that insanely claustrophobic scene from Aliens where he crawls through a mile-long, shoulder-tight tunnel.

As I’m on my back, my flashlight is shining up into the engine and I’m quickly realizing that I’m in over my head, (you may as well be teaching a monkey to do brain surgery at this point).

Then – shit got real.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

I heard growling.

With my god damn legs hanging out from under this car, I heard the deep guttural growling of a large dog within 10 feet of me, clearly growling directly at me.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

I began squirming out as the dog continued growling from the same spot.

Then I emerged.

I looked right.

And the growling stopped.

It was a familiar large, yellow lab, who started wagging his tail as he recognized me:

It was my neighbor’s dog.

And my neighbor was standing right behind his dog, with his hand firmly gripped on the dog’s leash.

“Need a hand?” he said with a chuckle.

He enjoyed f—king with me.

As a Westerner, do you want to see a stronger or weaker China? Do you think China’s current scheme (and how do you phrase it) is going to make it stronger or weaker? Do you want to change its scheme and why?

I am no Westerner

Yet I want to see a Super Strong China

It gives me hope that an EASTERN NATION can cut it at the top and not be always subservient to the West

Every History Chapter from 1500 AD onwards is about the West dominating the Global South

First the Spaniards & the Holy Roman Empire

Then the Portuguese

Then the British, Dutch and French

Then the British, Belgians & Prussians

Then the British and French

Then the Nazis

Then the Americans & Soviets

Then the Americans

It’s been 500–550 years since any Eastern Power has been able to hold a place at the top table

Japan tried in 1938–1939 but was throttled and embargoed

Japan tried again in 1979–1985 but was given a dose of PLAZA

Now China looks to be within 200 meters of the finish line

China to me is an ancient friend of India and a country that has no ideological issues with India

I want China to prosper and be as strong as possible

Then that gives me hope that India may follow Chinas footsteps

What are some examples of employees who were fired for being “too nice” in their workplace?

When I was 17, I worked for a cellphone store. One of my coworkers was helping this lady who was going through a tough time. Her husband passed away, and she had five small kids. He was their sole provider. She told us he cared for everything so she could focus on their home and kids. She needed a phone and didn’t have access to the funds her husband had left her because her mother-in-law was trying to take it from her. So my coworkers told her she could purchase the cheapest phone, and it would be suitable for a couple of months and work for what she needed it for. But we were instructed to tell the client they could only get the phone with the highest phone plan. If we sold it with the lowest phone plan, it would kill our numbers. My coworker saw this lady was struggling and did this for her. The next day when our boss asked why it had been done. He was furious and fired her for it. I quit a couple of days later.

Freedom!

What would you do in a school shooter situation?

I’m a teacher. I always insisted on having the crappy classroom at the end of corridor one, one of the five ground level corridors.

Why? I wanted to keep the students away from the office. If they were late, I wanted them to slip into my class without reporting to the authorities. I wanted easy and immediate access to the outside for any students experiencing acute anxiety or if they were about to burst into tears. If that happened, they were guaranteed some privacy.

I could also see who was at the Happy Tree across the street (a key pot smoking location).

My classroom was a long way from the office and most administrators were too lazy to come by. If they dropped by, there was a reason, which was fine with me.

But there was another reason I wanted to be at the end of corridor one.

The intruder alert procedures insisted that we gather on the floor in our classrooms, remain silent after closing the drapes or blinds and covering the window on the door and locking it.

Like fish in a drained barrel.

So that was the official Plan A.

My plan was Plan B.

If there was an intruder alert, I needed to determine the direction it came from. Then I wanted all my students to run across the street to the Happy Tree, as a group, on through the park, across the next street, and through the intersection to the mall. They were to be silent and fast. I would be behind them.

It never happened.

We have so much support and school-to-work programming for mentally ill and angry young men that I don’t think it will ever happen, but if I was wrong and it did happen, I wanted my students out of harm’s way.

They couldn’t be out of harm’s way if they were cowering in the corner of a classroom.

Why can’t America win any war?

Because a war isn’t fought with soldiers alone.

The US military is the biggest military power in the world. There’s no arguing against that. They have some of the best troops, the best tech, and probably the best logistics. Heck, strike “probably”, they fight wars on other continents.

What they often don’t have is a clear idea of what they want to achieve, and that’s down to the people who send them out. The US politicians rarely have a clear vision of their war objectives, and when they have one, it’s often laughably unrealistic.

George W. Bush planning the invasion of Iraq

For instance, the idea behind the adventures in both Afghanistan and Iraq was to install a democracy. That’s not a military objective, that’s a political objective, and the military is patently useless at that sort of thing. And it was a hopeless task to begin with; yes, there was a lot of opposition to Hussein, but they all just wanted a different crazed dictator. Vietnam became a total mess because, again, they sought a political outcome, and asked the military to achieve it, and then messed up the political side totally.

It’s all a bit like if Elon Musk wants new and better recruits for SpaceX, so he hires Lionel Messi and Novak Djokovic. Yes, they’re world class, but they’re not world class at what he’s trying to do.

Help me…

What’s the most dangerous thing you’ve seen someone do while driving?

I was driving through a long painful construction zone, we were reduced from three lanes to 1, for no apparent reason, we would suddenly come to a stop, with a flagman stopping us, then start up again. The speed was reduced from 110 kmph 68 mph to 50 kmph 30 mph.. We had been crawling along, or stopped for 16 km, 10 miles.

I was the person in front, when the flagman stopped, so there were no cars in front of me, for a couple of kilometers. When the flagman motioned for me to proceed I was leading the pack. After a couple of km I could see the “End of construction “ sign. For some reason there was a concrete barricade slanted across the shoulder. I started speeding up, I was maybe 50 feet from the barricade, that was also the end of construction, and I had sped up to maybe 80 kmph, out of nowhere, a guy passes me on the shoulder. He had to have seen the barricade, but he was accelerating, I’m guessing he was doing 200 kmph 124 mph when he flew by me, he had to instantly change into my lane, I slammed on the brakes, and he almost made it through, his bumper clipped the barricade and went flying through the air, and skidded across three lanes to disappear into the median. I swear he missed hitting me by less than a foot.

I was the only one who could see the end of construction, and 110 kmph sign, so I was the only one who had been speeding up, and there was a huge gap behind me that would have been easy to pull into, and once we passed the barricade, we were back to 3 lanes again, and I was the only car ahead of him.

I honestly had no idea that someone was doing 200 in a 50 kmph zone transitioning to 110, on the shoulder. It was single lane traffic, I wasn’t even checking my mirrors.

To save maybe 30 seconds, he lost his bumper. I have no idea how much more damage he did because he kept going at well over the speed limit.

What has your child’s school done that got you so mad, you went in and read the riot act to the teacher or principal?

This was a long time ago about 1985–86. My son was in I think 3–4 grade. He and a group of about 4 boys hung out together in the playground at recess. One day the 5 of them were hanging out at the swings. They were like sitting on them and talking but not really swinging in them. The story gets a bit long here.

Another boy came up and asked them for one of the swings since they weren’t really using them. Now one of the boys being a smarty pants said something like “ give me a quarter and I’ll let you have the swing”. To his surprise the boy gave him the quarter.

I think you see where this went. So everyday at recess the 5 boys would run out to the swings and charge a quarter for the other kids to ride the swings. This went on for about 2 weeks until someone at the school finally found out.

So I get a call from the school to come in. Come to find out they had called the police and had the school psychologist and a police detective “talk” to the boys. The detective actually threatened the boys that they could go to jail and psychologist wasn’t much nicer.

Now don’t get me wrong I was not condoning the behavior but in the end I don’t think what they did was actually wrong it just wasn’t very nice. The school on the other hand label these boys as the horrible thugs and the police even said that they were guilty of extortion. The psychologist was going on about deviant behavior and how traumatic an experience it was for the kids that paid for the swings.

I went in to the school but I did not take my son with me they asked me why and I said because I didn’t think they would want him to hear what I was about to say which was the following:

can understand your concern and my husband and I will deal with the behavior, however here are my issues.

The school intimated to me I should have noticed my son coming home with all this money and I was a poor parent. It was a quarter so no I wouldn’t notice he had a quarter on him at the end of the day. We’re not talking $10 a ride here, we had a change dish on top of the TV that he and his sister would take out money for lunches or milk/snacks at school so I wouldn’t really think it strange that he had an “extra” quarter at the end of the day.

*Where was the adult supervision on the playground that this behavior went on for 2 weeks before one of the others kids on the playground complained?

*Whereas I agree what they did wasn’t very nice it was in no way a criminal act or extortion. The boys did not threaten the other kids like gimme your money or I’ll beat you up or if you tattle you’ll be sorry. They simply were selling rides on the swings.

*You had absolutely no right to have my son ( who is probably about 8 years old) interrogated or questioned by either the police and psychologist without my permission.

*In the end the boys made about $2 total each because all of the boys said sometimes the kids only had a dime or a nickel to pay.

Again I agree it wasn’t a nice thing to do but illegal or immoral I don’t think so. I explained this to my son and I don’t know about the other boys but I did make my son apologize to the kids he could remember and he gave them their money back ( at least most of them that he recalled) it came out of his allowance.

The one thing I did tell the school was that if the roles were reversed and my son was told he had to pay a quarter to ride the swings. The first thing he would have done was when he got home he would have said something to either his dad or I.

My first question to him would have been “Did you give it to them?” If he had said yes I probably would’ve said something like “ Don’t do that again if they are asking you for money for the swing go tell a teacher. You don’t pay to ride the swing “ I would have then followed up with school it would not have gone on for 2 weeks!

I can’t believe that my son and his friends were the first ones to ever try something like this. But in my mind I can see these 5 boys with a little light bulb moment 💡 ! I asked that boy for a quarter to ride the swing and he gave it to me!!! There was nothing criminal or psychotic in their behavior just a bunch of boys being dumb.

My son did not grow up to become a social deviant or a gang member or thug. He is married with 3 kids and 3 grand children. I look at this episode as just one if those childhood stories that we tell at family gatherings.

Trans

What are the consequences of being too good at your job? Can you get fired for it?

One of the first jobs I had was at a distribution center for AH Robins Pharmaceuticals. I was assigned to work with another guy to fill and pack the small orders that shipped via UPS. I was 22 and had just been hired while my coworker was 29 and had been with the company for about 6 months. We were the youngest guys, by far, in the warehouse. Everyone else had been with Robins for 15+ years and all but one were 50 years old, or older. The other guy was 38.

Being young(er), we decided to make a game out of completing the orders by seeing who could pick and pack them faster. As a result, we’d finish the orders by lunch each day. Since we had half a day left and nothing to do, at first we were told to stock the small order shelves and then clean the area around the packing table. But we finished that so quickly the warehouse manager had one of us start helping the other workers pull truck orders.

That was when the older workers pulled us aside and told us that we needed to slow down because we were making them look bad. We just laughed at them. But then the warehouse manager called us into his office and told us to slow down and take our time, or he’d have to let us go.

We were puzzled by this and we finally worked up the courage to talk to the DC Ops Manager, and he explained that the warehouse was staffed with long-time employees who were set in their ways, and we needed to go along to get along. So we began stretching our orders out to last the entire day so our coworkers and boss would be happy, but the job no longer fun from that point on.

Why does China constantly conduct military exercises near Taiwan but never attack Taiwan directly?

Simple.

Taiwan is the yurt, not the front.

In pictures, Taiwan is this:

and not this:

The 24.7 military activity around Taiwan is a visible electric fence, a constant tripwire reminder that Taiwan is ringfenced, and the Taiwanese military is not doing anything about its ever-shrinking area of responsibility. It’s the classic boiling frog, with time scales measured in years.

A blockade is an ON-DEMAND military option today, based on demonstrated readiness, enabled by real-time multi-sensor intelligence and deployed assets.

The real battlefront lies further away, as far south as the Philippines, as far east as Guam, and as far north as the Japanese home islands.

In other words, the battlefront is as far south as America, as far east as America, and as far north as America.

Let me repeat, because it is important.

THE BATTLEFRONT IS AS FAR SOUTH AS AMERICA, AS FAR EAST AS AMERICA, AND AS FAR NORTH AS AMERICA.

That is the current strike capability of the combined Chinese military.

The island of Taiwan, paradoxically speaking, is no longer central to the question of Taiwan.

Militarily speaking, of course.

An ugly truth

What are some psychological tricks that are not only useful but also highly profitable?

1. The way you dress is linked with your mood. So dressing well most often helps in keeping you more stably happy.
2. People will be more willing to do something for you if you ask them in their right ear.
3. Women often ask questions about things they already know the answers to.
4. Studying for 30-50 minutes with 10-minute breaks is one of the best methods to improve your retention.
5. A person who enjoys being single is called Quirkyalone.
6. To make your thought sound convincing, say that you heard it from your parents or teachers.
7. Déjà vu occurs when your brain tries to apply a memory of a past situation to your current one, fails, and makes you feel like it’s happened.
8. We believe what we WANT to believe.
9. Listening to high-frequency music makes you feel calm, relaxed, and happy.
10. The cells in your body react to everything your mind says. So negativity brings down your immune system and you feel sick.

How do you politely tell a client that they are asking for too much work?

I always provide a clear estimate of every job I look at. I had a woman that had been referred to me by her sister but had been warned about her too. She had money but didn’t like spending it. She wanted a simple wheelchair ramp installed in her garage for her ailing husband. I noticed her 4500 sqft house needed a lot of work including a new roof. I offered to build the ramp for only $500, which was about $50 over cost of lumber. It was going to be a simple ramp with plywood covered with Astroturf or berber carpet. I figured it might open the door to other work on the house. I’d make my money back later. She looked at my estimate and passed it back to me. Then told me she knew somebody that can build it cheaper. I thanked her for her time and started walking to my truck. She asked me where I was going. I told her that by her comment that she was going to have the cheaper guy build it. She wanted me to lower my price. I said that was impossible as I was making zero on the ramp. The lumber alone was $450. After gas, I was breaking even. Again, I thanked her for her time and started walking back to my truck. She said she thought it would be closer to $300. I replied that It should have been at least $1500 and I was doing her a favor as I knew her sister and could see the house needed other repairs. She asked if I could do it for $300. I actually laughed and told her to hire the guy she knew that could to it cheaper. I’m done playing her games. I knew she was bluffing and there was no other cheaper guy. I wished her good luck and said my final goodbye. I later thanked her sister for warning me beforehand.

Why are there so many dead malls across the US?

For the most part, technology happened…

When I was a teenage & young adults (late 70’s to Mid-80’s) the shopping mall was at its peak. A large number of stores in a climate controlled environment where you only had to park once.

For me a visit to the mall was a visit to …

• The arcade (to play Space Invaders & Asteroids)
• One or two book stores (using both Walden Book and B Dalton)
• The music store
• Sears, to check out both electronics & tools
• Radio Shack
• The food court.

Now, both radio Shack & Sears were in decline by the mid to late 90’s anyway.

But console games spelled the death of arcades. When feed money into a game when you could play them at home as many times as you wanted?

Book, music and electronics are all found on amazon. And music, for the most part, now as downloads.

In many malls, there were also novelty stores like Spenser’s, and even hobby/arts & crafts focused stores. There seems to be an overall decline for some time, at least before the “maker movement” had a resurgence. But again, online shopping has seriously cut into that market.

I commended on an older answer, that most malls are filled with clothing stores, which is death via boredom for a typical guy.

I really don’t see malls coming back, at least not in their past “glory days” format.

1950’s housewife rules

What is the most badass thing your parent has ever done?

When I began school, we lived 3 doors down from the kindergarten school.

On the first day of school, I walked to school. My mom stood on the front porch and watched me walk all the way, and I waved to her when I got there.

I was very excited and could not wait for the day to proceed – I was a big girl, and was finally in school!

At that time, most schools still tried to force left-handed children to write with their right hand. I am left-handed.

My teacher walked behind me as I sat at a table with several other students. We were coloring pictures. She saw that I was using my left-hand. She smacked the back of my hand with her ruler. It was wood and had a metal strip on it. I jumped and dropped the crayon. She yelled at me that I was to use my right hand, it was not acceptable to use my left hand.

My kindergarten class was a half-day class. For the next 3 1/2 hours, every time I picked up anything with my left hand, she instantly slapped my hand with the ruler.

By the time I left to walk home, the back of my hand was bruised, and I had several cuts on my fingers from the metal band on her ruler.

I was no longer thrilled with the prospect of going to school.

I went home and told mom I was not going back.

When my father came home from work, mom told him what happened. He called me over to him and looked at my hand.

He picked up the phone and called his boss. He told him that he would be late to work the next day.

The next morning, my dad walked with me to the school.

It was a small school that was used only for kindergarten. There were 6 classes.

We walked in the front door of the school and my dad yelled for my teacher and the principal.

They both came running to see what the commotion was.

My father was very loud with the principal about the fact that my hand was bruised and cut.

He then turned to my teacher and told her very clearly that I was left-handed and that I would remain left-handed.

He then told her that if I came home from school with one more mark on me from her trying to force me to write with my right hand that he would return to the school and make sure that she had two marks for every mark she put on me.

He then looked at me and said, “Joyce, you write with your left hand.”

He then walked me into my classroom, helped me hang up my sweater, and walked me to my chair.

He patted me and told me he’d see me at dinner. He then gave my teacher a scowl and left.

It is now not a big thing to be left-handed. That was not always the case. It was the first time I realized that I was not like everyone else. Dad showed me it was OK to be different.

What’s a childhood secret you’ve never told your parents about?

When my younger sister and I were about 14 and 16, we went shopping at a department store together. We separated briefly, she went to the washroom while I looked through albums in the music department. When she was about 15 minutes late at our prearranged meeting spot, I went to the adjacent car park to see if she’d returned to our car by mistake. The garage was enclosed, dark and mostly deserted and I heard footsteps rapidly heading away from me as I approached our car, a low slung mustang. My sister suddenly popped out from under the car and threw herself into my arms, sobbing and shaking. A creep had lurked outside the ladies’ washroom and followed her all around until she panicked and ran to the garage to hide. I was furious and 16 year-old me drove around that parkade to try to find that creep predator. I had some half formed plan of running him over. We returned home, and decided not to say anything to our parents because we didn’t want to lose our car privileges and the ability to shop on our own. Now that I understand just how bad that could have turned out, and realize that predator was a danger to other young girls, I realize that I should have told my parents, so that they would have contacted the police. Instead, we decided to stay together when shopping downtown, and practiced alternative ways to shake off a creep. My sister made a decision that day that could have cost her life. My parents were never told.

Furious?

What’s something that sucks about being a man?

I was travelling by bus to a place. And was sitting alone on the seat meant for two people, window side. The scenery was beautiful and I was lost looking outside the window, enjoying beauty of nature.

The bus stopped and a lady boarded the bus. She looked like she was aged above 60. Now, there were two seats empty in the entire bus. One was besides me and other one behind me. Same as me, a man was sitting in window seat behind me, alone. He too looked like he was enjoying the beauty of nature seemed happy with the window seat.

Now the lady stood besides me, thought for a while and asked me to sit with the man sitting behind me. I was like, why? Can’t you sit besides me or that man? Are we going to eat you? Why are you killing our enjoyment? She was adamant and started creating a scene.

I had to get up and sit besides that man. He felt my reaction and offered me window seat but, I thanked him and choose to be on the aisle seat.

What an unnecessary sacrifice! You need to kneel befor fake feminism, THAT SUCKS ABOUT BEING A MAN.

In the United States, what happens if you have an emergency medical condition, like appendicitis, and you don’t have medical insurance? Do you have to find money to pay for the surgery before you can get operated on?

My wife nearly died about 22 years ago. She had cysts on her fallopian tubes. On one side it was big enough that it caused the tube to twist, which torqued the ovary on that side. It basically folded over. This prevented proper blood flow to the organ, so it died inside of her.

I had an entry-level corporate job with good health coverage. The kind where you have to tell hospital staff to check again and see that no, I don’t actually have to pay for xrays, blood tests, yadda yadda, I have the GOOD coverage. Even so, after the emergency hysterectomy I was hit with a bill that was many, many thousands of dollars. I tried to negotiate a payment plan but there was no way I could pay enough monthly for them to agree to it, so they garnished my wages. A lot. Faced with losing my car (and therefore my ability to get to work) and having to choose between groceries/prescriptions and rent/utilities, I had to declare bankruptcy. It took me a decade or so to pay it off, and that’s after they wiped out a lot of my debt and consolidated the rest. Fucked my credit to boot.

And that healthcare that people on here love to tout as the best in the world? Without my intervention, they would have killed my wife. The morning the surgery was scheduled for, no one showed up to take her from her room to the OR. I tracked down a nurse and was told that because my wife has a fever, she needs to go home and take tylenol or something and come back when the fever goes down. While she has a dead organ killing her from the inside. I screamed that the fever wouldn’t go down until she was dead, and made a big enough scene that they finally consulted a couple more docs until one said “well yeah, we’ve got to operate now, wtf are you waiting for?!?!”

What’s the “meanest” thing you’ve done for your child that you know he/she will thank you later for?

Hahaha

When my sons were younger, their Dad and I began teaching them both how to tidy up. This began with the usual dirty clothes in the laundry basket and toys being put away, taking dishes through to the kitchen etc. Pretty standard stuff. As they got older, we taught them how to do their own laundry, wash dishes and hoover. In the beginning, it was all a novel experience for them and they were eager to help mummy and daddy – especially when it came to us teaching them to bake or cook simple meals.

Fast forward to when my eldest started secondary school.

Naturally, the novelty had long since worn off and it was such a big deal if I dared ask them to do something around the house *gasp* (How dare I?) One day, my eldest had been asked to tidy up the mess he had left in the kitchen – it wasn’t much, just a butter knife and toast crumbs on the side and a dirty plate and glass. He huffed and looked at me.

“You know something, Mum? I don’t think I should have to do this…”

“Why not? You made the mess…”

“Well, I’ve been speaking to Nev* and he says he doesn’t have to do this sort of thing…”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, he says his mum does it all while he’s at school and his dad’s at work. So why should I have to do it?”

I knew I had to choose my words carefully here, he was all but saying it was a mum’s job to do everything around the house. I could see his dad open his mouth and I held up my hand to stop him.

“Son, does Nev’s mum work?”

“No, she stays at home.”

“Ok, do I work?”

“Yes…”

“Does your dad work?”

“Yes, but…”

“And who is the first person home each day?”

“Well, me I suppose, but…”

“So do you think it’s fair that after dropping you and your brother at school in a morning, commuting to work, sitting in an office for eight hours then commuting back, picking up your brother from the after school club and come home to find you’ve made a mess in the kitchen from making a snack, do you think it’s fair that I should have to tidy your mess?”

“But Nev’s mum…”

“Son, do you think it’s fair?”

“Well, no, but…Nev thinks it’s mean…”

“Oh does he now. I’ll tell you what, let’s go ask him shall we?”

Son wasn’t happy when I took him round to Nev’s. We spoke with Nev’s mum who was less than impressed by what both boys had said, but what was funnier was when she turned to Nev and said: “I don’t give you jobs to do then do I? I guess I’ll have to find you something else to occupy your time if you think that, won’t I?”

Needless to say, both boys were not happy that we had called their bluff.

Fast forward another few years, both sons can do their own laundry, cook excellent meals and tidy up etc. Son’s girlfriend was really impressed when he cooked her a meal and she asked me how come he was such a good cook. I just laughed and said, “I was mean.”

*Name changed

Four ways

What causes a person to live like a recluse and not want to deal with the outside world?

Stress. I know recluses. They actually enjoy my company, I know when to leave. One of them worked hard and burned out, he found he was less and less productive. Working longer hours and getting less done.

He started working from home, he quit going to crowded bars, if there were more than 3 people in a group, he was out of there. He couldn’t take the anxiety.

He became more productive again.

Another person had a concussion that lead to post concussion syndrome. They were a social butterfly, and suddenly they couldn’t be in a room with more than 6 people. They couldn’t handle sirens, helicopters, barking dogs, squealing kids, or crowds. If they came to the end of a grocery aisle and there was someone waiting to cross, they would be frozen with anxiety, not able to make a decision.

People that can’t handle crowds become hermits.

President Obama said he was suffering from decision overload, so he had someone make all of his small decisions so he had the resources to handle the big ones.

Someone laid out what clothes he should wear, scheduled all of his appointments, chose his meals, etc.

The older I get the more I am susceptible to stress, so I can relate to them, and hope that I am not just like them in 10 years.

What did your boss ever say in the office that caused you to resign?

I was a middle school teacher(1984). The night before school started my 18 month old son started having seizures. My husband and I spent the whole night at the hospital with him. The doctors did a spinal tap and my son lost feeling in his legs. The doctor said that it could be temporary, or it could be permanent. I still showed up at school the next morning and I told my principal that my husband was staying with my son for the week and that I would need the following week off. The principal told me, you need to decide whether you want to be a mother or a teacher because you can’t be both. I resigned on the spot and went home. My son did regain full sensation in his legs a couple of weeks later There was no way I was going back to that school.

Looking for a wife

What are signs of a covert narcissist?

In my experience, there is only one sign I always look for to discern a covert narcissist.

The other red flags will pick up narcissists, but they pick up the overts or malignants.

But there is one thing, yes one thing, that is simultaneously so subtle that it makes coverts fly under the radar, and also the one thing which is what makes a covert narcissist a covert narcissist. In other words, this one thing makes coverts different from all the other types of narcissists. It is their signature.

It’s switching off.

Coverts switch off. They practice

• avoidance
• ghosting
• withholding
• neglect
• silence
• pretend not paying attention
• pretend not hearing you
• pretend misunderstanding you
• pretend there is something wrong with you when you talk about something serious and dear to you (e.g. reframes you as bitter and unable to let go when you share insights on narcissism etc. -> covertly tearing you down by twisting your perspective; this is a form of switching off because they refuse to lower themselves to empathize with your perspective so as to understand it, they switch off listening and understanding)
• pretend superiority (e.g. I forgave my narcissist, therefore I’m superior to you, you wouldn’t talk so much about your narcissist if only you would forgive them, you should forgive, for your own sake, never let the narcissist change you, I choose love, I choose forgiveness, I choose not to hate, no one is evil, everyone deserves compassion, we are all the same, there is humanity in everyone, etc. -> blowing their own trumpet; this is a form of switching off because they refuse to lower themselves to empathize with your perspective so as to understand it, they switch off listening and understanding)
• acting stupid to create situations (e.g. to persistently cause miscommunication and misunderstanding, to ignore you and create opportunities to withhold, to get away with having done harmful things, to deliberately frustrate and antagonize you by doing the opposite of what they are supposed to do, deliberately act bored or switched off while you are giving instructions and then doing the opposite of something simple you asked for e.g. don’t buy eggs -> buys two cartons of eggs and then proudly boasts that you asked for them)
• you take a walk with them, you stop by to admire a flower (or you fell down and sprained something), they pretend not to notice and keep walking on without you, and you either look up from the flower to find yourself all alone, or you lie there watching their back recede into the horizon
• they cut in line right in front of you just as you open your mouth to give your order, preventing it, pretend to be oblivious, and happily make their order instead, you stare at their side profile (what the hell! can you believe this girl?)
• they do something they know they shouldn’t do (e.g. litter, trespass, jaywalk, steal your food or your seat, or chat on the phone loudly in the cinema, leave their car in the middle of the road blocking everyone, walk in the middle of the meant road for cars) and then pretend to be helpless, oblivious, or ignorant when you have an issue with them
• not pick up the phone
• they pick up your phone call, they are told to pass a message to you, they take the message and never pass it on to you
• you are napping, the phone rings, the covert narcissist is right next to the phone, they let the phone keep ringing, it wakes you up, you run across the house to groggily pick up the phone while the covert narcissist was right next to it all along (at other times the phone manages to ring out) (this happens consistently)
• the receptionist who cuts everyone off midsentence to transfer them, and keeps doing it the whole day, every day
• they never reply your email (even though they are not busy)
• they never return your call (phone message)
• you greet them, they look down but make sure they never acknowledge you (they don’t stare at you because that’s malignant, but they make sure they do not reply) (some will look down and give a Mona Lisa smile, like they are slightly embarrassed at their own rude behavior)
• you sit across them at the party, they look away from you in disgust, avoiding eye contact and refusing to talk to you, a guest passes by, the covert narcissist suddenly beams a smile at you and says ‘hey, remember that time when … ?’, the guest passes on by, the covert narcissist terminates mid-sentence and goes back to snubbing you, until the next guest comes by
• walk out on you midsentence
• keep on talking as if to you after you’ve left the room, still holding the conversation but without you
• covert narcissists are experts at urging everyone to get along, forgive everyone, hate no one, and then mysteriously degrading you through silence and withholding over nothing (they have weird concepts of what getting along means)
• mysterious sour moods (they are a form of switching off, the switching off of love or joy, sour moods in the absence of concrete causes are a form of withholding, and especially negatively affects susceptible empaths nearby)
• convenient unavailability or inaccessibility
• disappear
• run away from fights they started with their covert antagonisms and microaggressions
• coverts are experts at telling you they don’t want a fight with you after they’ve finally button pushed you to the limit and caused you to start sorting things out with them
• snub
• ignore
• always have nothing to say in response to what you just said (covertly deflating you and degrading you by refusing to reflect back to you sanity and gravitas; it’s as if their attitude is always ‘you just said something stupid, I’m not going to honor that with a response’ to everything you enthusiastically share or say)
• or they will always give a lackluster or subtly negative devaluation or degradation response to your happy, exciting, inspiring experience
• not be courteous when courtesy is appropriate and expected (hyper-courteous at other times as if they were on an audition) (courtesy is a weapon to be deployed in the most inappropriate ways)
• always being the unavailable shoulder for you to cry on only when you have dramas in life (only unavailable when you need them, this is not a fairweather friend, it’s weaponized withholding)
• after you tell them your sob story, they make sure they never say a word to console you (e.g. ok, bye!)
• you call, the covert narcissist picks up the phone, you want the covert narcissist to pass a message to someone else, just as you start telling your message, the covert narcissist pretends you’ve finished and says ‘ok bye!’ and starts hanging up, forcing you to scream for them to wait and not hang up on you.
• making promises just so they can abuse through failing to come through (duper’s delight e.g. ‘you’re a fool to believe my promises or to trust me’)
• making sure they don’t inform you when they go on extended vacations, so that you will call them on the phone, still expecting to make a date for lunch, but there’s no one home to pickup, should you call the police and report missing persons?
• making sure they cancel plans on you at the last minute, while making sure you never get wind of it any earlier, to create the greatest last minute upset (this is worst when there’s plane tickets involved)
• frustratingly not give any response or acknowledgement whatsoever when it is appropriate to the situation – the mannikin routine (this is always deliberate, make no mistake, it just appears like an accident each time for maximum plausible deniability)
• the impossible to please parent, spouse, child, boss, sibling, friend

Coverts practice weaponized switching off. They are like a demonstration prototype that always refuses to work at the convention in front of the investors, or the cartoon frog that only sings when there’s no audience, and switches back to ‘ribbid’ when an audience gathers to listen. Or a mannikin that comes to life when the lights are off, dances, holds parties, then freezes back into position when lights come on, or Toy Story.

This is a peculiar form of passive aggressive crazymaking particular to covert narcissists.

Learning to recognize weaponized switching off will allow you to spot covert narcissists early.

Most people are trained to dismiss and overlook weaponized switching off because it is very highly plausibly deniable, but secondly, because they did not suspect the nature of covert narcissists. This causes them to impute more decency in the covert narcissist than they posses.

When being the recipient of weaponized switching off, something will feel odd to your gut. That’s because your gut senses that the covert narcissist is missing cues. This missing cues is deliberate. Missing cues is something the covert narcissist cannot help doing because their nature is antagonism and hatred, and refusing to behave appropriately by honoring the subtle cues of interaction is how they rebel and live out their intrinsic hatred (don’t mistakenly do this to people in the Asperger spectrum, or those who are depressed, or those suffering from chronic fatigue syndrome, or Alzheimers or dementia, or who lack sleep).

(The cause of missing cues is zero affective empathy. Zero affective empathy causes the covert to both overcompensate with lurvebombing at times, and weaponized switch off at other times. This is because zero affective empathy causes their emotional reaction to everything to be inappropriate, screwy, and ‘off’. Hence their emotional response to everything is always inappropriate. This can be easily detected once you know to look for it. Fakeness, all fake people are coverts.)

It’s hard to explain, and easy to dismiss. But you will feel erased to various degrees in their presence.

The point of switching off is to refuse to acknowledge your personhood (to deny you the glory you deserve through simple things like paying attention or replying earnestly – by the way paying attention and earnest replies are acts of love). They are not switching off to conserve battery. They are switching off to micro-antagonize you. It’s covert button pushing. This is how they toy with your emotional wellbeing. It is meant to produce in you shame, embarrassment, frustration, anger and insecurity. They like to throw you emotionally off balance. This is how they make themselves feel better, at your expense. As you get to know them better and better, they will switch from micro-antagonisms to bigger and bigger antagonisms, and it tends to happen along the lines of withholding, denial, avoidance. Malicious suppression.

What they actually switched off was their humanity. The game is to attack your humanity through switching off their own humanity. A humane person does not seek to feel better through causing hurt feelings. Cruelty is inhumane. Covert narcissists have emotional cruelty built into them. It’s a lot like what they talked about regarding Auschwitz.

Funnily, covert narcissists hate it when you switch off on them. Just try it and see, fail to answer or acknowledge them, pretend you weren’t listening and give no response to them, and see how they react.

My theory is that they react so poorly to their own medicine because they know that whenever anyone does that, it is a deliberate, antagonistic move, because they are well aware that they wanted to ruin things whenever they themselves did it.

11 If a son asks for [a]bread from any father among you, will he give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will he give him a serpent instead of a fish?

12 Or if he asks for an egg, will he offer him a scorpion?

Bible Gateway passage: Luke 11:11-13 – New King James Version

Ask a covert narcissist for bread and you will get a stone.

Ask a covert narcissist for fish and you will get a serpent.

Ask a covert narcissist for an egg and you will get a scorpion.

These are forms of weaponization, weaponization against your expectations, and weaponized switching off against doing what’s decent.

Sounds good, but isn’t

What is the oddest reason you have been contacted by your child’s school?

“Hello. Is this (my sister) Laykia’s guardian?”

“Yes, this is her mother speaking.”

“Ah, hello, Miss. I am Mr. McMichaels. I’ve come to talk to you about your child’s behavior!”

“Right,”

“Right now, as we speak, your daughter is on the floor crying.”

“…”

“Yes. And she won’t stop.”

“My… 6-year-old daughter… Is crying. Right now. And you decided to call me about it.”

“Well, yes, because I asked her what could I do to stop her from crying and she said to call you.”

“Ah,”

“So how is your day?”

“Has my daughter stopped crying yet?”

“Mmm, NO! She won’t stop crying untill you talk to me for a bit more!”

*in unconvinced tone* “Uh-huh”

“So, let’s ignore the topic of your daughter for a moment. What are you doing tonight?”

“Tell my daughter to shut up and be a man. Goodbye, Mr.McMichaels.”

“WHAT ABOUT SIX?!”

“Oh. At 6 I will be going on a date with my lovely husband for our 20th anniversary! Never contact me again, Sir.”

My sister comes home and explains she did not cry that day, nor did she have Mr. McMichaels as her teacher.

The teacher tried, and failed, to plan a date with my mother.

SHAME ON HIM!

EDIT: EEeEe, I’m sorry, guys, I didn’t make this clear enough! This is from the POV of my Mother, not me! I’m sorry for the confusion lmao <3

Also, thank you guys for the love and upvotes! Ik my Mama should’ve said something to the Principal but she was in tears about how funny it was. My Mum isn’t what you would call ‘A responsible adult’ She just laughs at things like this. But, I swear, if something more were to happen she would have told someone I assure you that.

Other than shouting back, what’s the best thing to do if your boss screams at you about something you did wrong?

Not my boss, but a true story. A few years ago I was in a pizza shop waiting to pick up my takeaway pizza. A store manager at the counter publicly tore verbal strips off a young trainee who had apparently made an error in her work. I was appalled at the way he humiliated the poor little thing in front of onlookers. At the time one of my children had begun part-time work during the school holidays to earn some money and this young lady only looked about her age. I’m a teacher and maternal, and while all the other customers looked uncomfortable but weren’t going to say anything, I decided to let fly. I mean, what could he do to me? I wasn’t his employee.

I stepped up to the counter and took on the manager. I told him that what she had done was totally understandable given her age and level of experience. I then said that how he handled it was NOT and that I was going to report him to the company for foul language and abuse of a minor. I had his name from his badge and I had the receipt showing time and date of my purchase and that he really needed to go to counselling and get help.

He turned on me, screaming abuse and making a fuss, and actually came out from behind the counter to tower over me, attempting physical intimidation seeing as yelling at me was not having the desired effect. I got out my mobile phone and recorded him, and another customer at the store called the police and reported him. I also made good on my threat, got in touch with the company with details and was assured that they would investigate the matter. I think the fact that the police had been involved swayed them.

Anyway, long story short, about a year after the incident I returned to the shop (they did make good pizza!) and the young trainee came up and thanked me for my help. The former manager had gone to counselling but it then came out that he had been groping other female workers and they were emboldened by the fact that I had taken a stand and spoke up about him. He lost his job and I have no idea where he is now. But I hope nobody else has had to suffer from his misogynistic rants.

48th Law

What incident fundamentally changed the way you viewed China (for better or for worse)?

Learning Chinese and got to visit China in 2008 (and then in 2010 and 2013)

Before 2008, I attended a college in the US and my view on China was roughly the same as the Western MSM (Communists, human rights abuses, people have no freedom etc.) However, having visited China 3 times and witnessing the development gradually changed my views on China.

I remembered my first day when I landed in Beijing and I wanted to test my Chinese, so I asked a taxi driver whether his life is okay in China. He replied, “还可以“， which means “it’s okay” without sounding worried or oppressed at all.

That surprised me a lot. Weren’t the people of China oppressed? Why was his tone so relaxed?

And during that Olympics year, I witnessed the boom of subway in Beijing. When I first got there, there were just 3 operational lines (Line 1, 2, and 13), but just a couple months later, 3 or so more lines became operational. My life in Beijing was better than expected. I thought I was going to feel oppressed in China, but apart from censorship of certain contents (notably contents on Dalai Lama and Falungong), I was free to enjoy jianbing every morning and free to explore the city (it helped that Beijing subway back then only cost RMB2, or just a little more than a quarter dollar). Moreover, me having Chinese heritage can blend in very well in China and I enjoyed same kind of usual city life in a similar fashion to that of Bangkok. And I ended that year by taking the Z-train from Beijing to visit the Yangtze River Delta area. Their sleeping cabins were far better than the Thai ones (and I China was poorer than Thailand in per capita income back then)

Fast forward to 2010, my view on China became more neutral. Having spent months in Beijing 2 years prior, I thought living in China isn’t so bad. I didn’t whine the same MSM rhetorics anymore but I still couldn’t find positive things to talk about China. That year, what amazed me were their infrastructure. I took the bullet sleeper train from Shanghai to Beijing, and it was the first time I ever saw a bullet sleeper train! By this time, I was convinced that the Chinese transportation infrastructure was miles ahead of Thailand.

2013 was a really pivotal year for me. In that year, I decided to tour China alone by myself from Datong to Xi’an, then to Lanzhou and Dunhuang, then back to Xi’an and Beijing before taking the train to North Korea. By being able to speak the language and being able to blend in with Chinese people, whenever I travelled around any city with Europeans or Americans, there were always Chinese people asked me whether I can ask those white people to have pictures taken with those Chinese locals. Also, one day on the train from Xi’an to Lanzhou, I met a young Chinese college student in her berth opposite to mine. She saw me looking very Chinese, yet reading a guidebook about China in English. Once, she asked me in Chinese to move something out of the way and I did it for her, then the conversation began. She was so surprised to know that I’m not Chinese but a Thai, and then moved on to talk about her Thai idols. I was also surprised that a lot of Chinese people know the politics of my country quite well.

Having all those experiences in 2013, I concluded that Chinese people are so curious and they asked me a lot of questions after knowing I’m a foreigner. They are hunger for experiences and perspectives. But most importantly, they are people who simply want to work hard and enjoy a good life, as we all are in any part of the World. Politics are of very least concern for them. The way Chinese people come to you may seem rude, but I interpreted those moves as sincere curiosity.

Then my view on China gradually became more positive, as seeing people across China hunger for knowledge and better life made me realize massive potential of this millennia-old civilization that my ancestry also belongs. And since I mentioned “sincere curiosity”, Chinese people are also very friendly (it helped though that I can speak the language). I’m sure that even if you are whites from Europe or America, if you start a conversation in Chinese, you will easily make friends in China.

Having been to China for 3 successive times also fascinated me that each time I was there, I saw massive amount of development unfolded right before my eyes. Then I started to wonder why I thought China was such an evil place pre-2008. Looking at the people and infrastructure, they surely have come very far on the World stage. And nothing matters more than current generation of Chinese people are living decent lives. To me, I think whoever was running China did the job well enough to ensure steady prospects for her citizens.

Now, I would like to have my fourth visit and see their entrepreneurial spirits in places like Shenzhen, Hangzhou, and Beijing with my own eyes and be blown away just like all three visits prior.

Tuscan Onion Soup with Shaved Parmesan

Onion soup is a hearty dinner.

If French onion soup is on a menu John or I are sure to order it. We really love it! Onions, cooked slowly with beef stock and then topped with bread and cheese! What is there not to like? Then, one evening we were invited to a friend’s house for dinner, and they served Italian onion soup. It was different from the French version, but it was delicious, and I had to have the recipe.

Where did Italian onion soup come from?

I did a little research on this fantastic dish and learned that it is known as Carabaccia. It originated in Tuscany going back at least to the 15th century. Carabaccia was made with red onions which are native to Tuscany. It had a sweet and sour flavor and used almonds as a thickener. A piece of bread would be placed in the bottom of the bowl and the soup would be poured over it and then topped with cheese. Sound familiar?

Apparently, Catherine d’ Medici brought the recipe to France with her from Tuscany when she married King Henry II. It is said that this was one of Leonardo DaVinci’s favorite dishes. Over the years changes were made to the original recipe. Some modern takes on this soup include the addition of a poached egg and the omission of the almonds as a thickener.

Ingredients

• 3 pounds white onions (3 or 4 large)
• 4 medium leeks
• 4 ounces pancetta, in 1 piece
• 1/4 cup extra-virgin olive oil
• 6 cups chicken stock
• 3 to 4 tablespoons balsamic vinegar
• 3/4 to 1 cup fruity red wine, such as Merlot or Beaujolais
• Salt and pepper, to taste
• 6 slices rustic country style bread
• 2 garlic cloves, peeled, halved
• 3 ounces Wisconsin parmesan cheese, in 1 chunk
• 2 tablespoons fresh parsley, chopped

Ingredients

My version is a little different and closer to some of the more modern takes on the recipe. It does not have the sweet and sour flavor that was typical of Carabaccia and I omitted the almonds altogether.

Red onions are still the main ingredient. I also use a nice rich red wine and some tomato sauce to compliment the flavor of the onions. I also like the addition of beef stock, where the original recipe might have used a vegetable stock. Garlic and thyme, also add to the robust flavors of this soup.

Tips for making Italian Onion Soup

• The onions are the star ingredient in this recipe, so they need to be cooked carefully to get the best flavor out of them. The onions, garlic and sugar should be added to a pan with hot oil and cooked down until they are soft and caramelized. To do this you will need to set the heat on your stove low and allow the onions to cook slowly so that they do not burn. You will need to be patient; it may take 20 minutes or more for the onions to soften.
• When you add the wine bring the soup to a boil and then lower the heat a bit and let it cook until the wine is reduced by half. This will heighten the flavor of the wine.
• It is best to whisk the tomato sauce and the flour together before you add it to the soup. Make sure that you do not have any lumps of flour in the sauce before you add it.
• Once all the remaining ingredients have been added, let the soup cook on low heat for 1 hour. The slow cooking process creates a rich robust soup that is worth the wait!

Instructions

1. Peel the onions and cut in half lengthwise. Thinly slice crosswise.
2. Trim the leeks and cut in half lengthwise. Slice crosswise in 1/4 inch slices, using 3 inches of pale green. Place the leeks in cold water, and rinse to remove the dirt. Drain. Reserve the onions and leeks.
3. Unroll the pancetta and dice into 1/4-inch pieces.
4. Heat the olive oil in a large soup pot over medium-high heat. Add the pancetta and cook until some of the fat has been rendered, about 5 minutes.
5. Add the onions and leeks. Sauté for 20 minutes or until tender, stirring occasionally.
6. Add the stock, and simmer 30 minutes.
7. Stir the vinegar, wine, salt, and pepper into the soup. Cook until thoroughly heated.
8. Toast the bread slices, and rub with the peeled garlic clove halves.
9. Spoon the soup into soup bowls. Float the bread croutons in the soup. Pare 4 or 5 shavings of the cheese on top of each serving.
10. Garnish with the chopped parsley, and serve immediately.

Servings: 6

By Chef Thomas Catherall, C.M.C

As a teacher, what is the saddest thing you’ve found out about one of your students?

I once had a young lady in 12th grade come to me at the end of class, just before lunch, and tell me her Uncle, who lived with them, was molesting her. I instantly reported it to the Admin and the Campus Police. The Campus officer burst out cussing. It seems that two+ years before the same Uncle had gone to prison for molesting the same girl. He was a good manipulator and had convinced the prison shrinks he was reformed and as a first timer got released early on parole. And the terminally stupid parents let him move right back in with them – he was the Mother’s “Baby Brother” and had always been spoiled etc. The girl and her little brother were taken out of the home and sent to live with another Aunt and Uncle, I seem to remember one of them was a peace officer. The molester was sentenced to a long term with “no parole” and her parents were put on probation for child endangerment. She didn’t even come to check out, the Admin did all her papers to send her to another high school for her. But one of them passed on her “Thank You” to me. It seems I was the 4th teacher she told and the only one who did anything. The rumor was the other three were demoted to probationary teacher and put on notice as well as having a prosecutor warn them that he could charge them with a felony for failure to report the suspected abuse and just might still do it if they failed to report anything again, even if it was just a rumor they heard from the students.

What is the per capita income in China? Is there a need for China to increase its national income for better living standards? Why or why not?

No not at all. First GDP itself is a highly flawed form of economic measurement. GDP per capital. Is therefore by same extension is highly flawed.

Let’s just look at one item if GDP. Healthcare. The U.S. with a mere 330 million population has GDP that consists of 6 trillion dollars Healthcare and pharmaceutical items while China that has 4 times the U.S. population if 1.4 billion people has a GDP that consist of only 1 trillion dollars in the same category!

So why is that? China offers universal healthcare coverage compared to the U.S. billing every penny to the healthcare industry and hence the difference. The irony is China today as a life expectancy of 78 years old versus 76 years old for the U.S.

So either the U.S. overstated its GDP by 24 times that of China or China understand its GDP by the same ratio! Hence American’s look rich but they are not and Chinese look poor but they are actually a lot richer.

We haven’t even factored in real purchasing power parity. A dollar can buy a Big Mac in the U.S. but the same dollar can exchange for roughly 7 RMB and that can buy you 3 Big Mac in Beijing. So once you factored in that and you factored in the 0.1% in the U.S. owns almost everything and 99.99% Americans are a mere average Chinese but less capable to think for themselves!

Per Capita GDP in USD is a totally non factor!

What are some of the best examples of “American ignorance”?

I’m from the US, but unlike most US citizens I’ve traveled extensively. Even so, the five best examples of “American ignorance” I’ve witnesses all occurred within the US.

1) The car that makes its own gas. I was on a flight, sitting in first class, and next to me was a college student (from Quinnipiac College). I was reading a car magazine, and she very excitedly told me that she had just gotten a new car, and what she loved about it the most was that the car made its own gas. This was before the era of electric cars, so that couldn’t have been what she meant. I asked her how her car ‘made its own gas’. She said she didn’t know how, but it was so great that it did. I asked her who told her that it makes its own gas. She explained that was the strange part; the dealer didn’t even mention that! She went on to explain that she drove the car off the dealer’s parking lot, and the gauge said the car had enough gas to go 381 miles. She got on the expressway and drove 15 miles to her parents house, and when she got there the gauge said that the car had enough gas to to go 409 miles! So she’d never have to buy gas again because when she drove 15 miles it made 27 miles worth of gas!!

2) I want a room with an ocean view! I was checking into a hotel in Orlando, FL. Ahead of me in line was a couple from Minnesota, demanding that the desk agent give them a room with an ocean view. The desk agent patiently explained that Orlando is 60 miles from the Atlantic Ocean, so there were no rooms in the hotel that had a view of the ocean since it was an hour’s drive away. The man raised his voice and exclaimed “Don’t you go lying to me; I looked at the map and Orlando is only a half inch from the ocean!”

3) How the f**k am I supposed to know what zip code I’m in? I was at a gas station in Tucson AZ. I no longer live there, but I used to. I was filling up the tank, and a guy at the pump next to me was swearing up a storm and hitting the pump. He came over to me and angrily asked “Do you know what f**king zip code we are in?” and I told him I wasn’t sure, but I thought it was 85719. He went back to his car and moments later was was screaming and kicking the pump again. Then I realized that he thought the pump was asking him to enter the zip code for the gas station, instead of the billing zip code for his credit card!

4) Only an hour from Boston and an hour from NYC! I was at a high school graduation party for my nephew, and I met his girlfriend for the first time. I asked her where she was going to college in the fall, and she told me she was going to Quinnipiac College. I asked her why she chose that school, and she told me that it was in the most amazing location, only an hour’s drive to Boston and an hour’s drive to NYC. I asked her how that could be, since it takes 3h30m with no traffic to get from Boston to NYC, so there isn’t anywhere can be an hour’s drive to Boston and an hour’s drive to NYC. She said “that’s what’s so special about the location!” <Note – I have nothing against Quinnipiac College, it is pure coincidence that two of these stories involve their students>

5) The impact of video games on violent behavior. I’ve been involved in college admissions for both Harvard and MIT. I don’t think I ever laughed so hard as when I read the opening sentence of an applicant’s essay: “The impact of video games on violent behavior has been a controversial topic for centuries.”

And just to show that ignorance isn’t limited to Americans, here’s one involving a Brit;

I’ve been on eBay since before you were born. One of my hobbies is restoring and refurbishing old cameras. I pick up ratty old cameras at random antique stores, goodwill, garage sales, and, of course on eBay, and clean and repair them. On eBay I often find great deals when someone misspells a camera name, so it doesn’t come up in a standard search (i.e. Rollleiflex or Cannon or Lieca) so I search for misspelled versions, and often end up as the only bidder. Once I came across a listing with a whopper of an error. The photo was of a very rare and expensive camera, the Olympus OM-3, with a title and description of a very common and inexpensive camera, the Olympus OM-30. At the time, the OM-30’s sold for $10 – $15, but the OM-3 is very rare, and never sells for less than about $600, sometimes as much as $1800. I felt bad; that was too much of a differential to let the seller leave all that money on the table. So I emailed the seller and asked if the item for sale was the camera in the photo or the camera in the description, and let the seller know that the camera in the photo was worth quite a bit, and if that was what was for sale, s/he might want to adjust the item title so that the auction got the attention it deserved.

The response I got:

“Of course it’s what’s in the picture! How else would I get the picture, you daft cow! Who are you, the eBay police? I’ve been on eBay since before you were born and I don’t need you telling me how to run my business! Bugger off”

So I bought it for $10.27, as the only bidder! I ended up selling it a few weeks later for $1200.

Sigma Males