Relationships. Sigh.
I’ve been though a bunch. Ugh. I will tell you that I have experienced more than my comfortable share of them. Sad to say.
I do know that some of your MM readers are going though some of the relationship troubles right now.
I feel your pain.
I know that it is difficult.
Today, I want to cover a couple of videos about relationships. Painful stuff. Ugh.
Really.
Painful.
…
Guys, most of you all are not having relationship troubles. You are past all that. You are living a life. You have a family.
Loved ones.
Pets.
A life.
Please. Listen to me.
APPRECIATE them today.
…
Make today special. Appreciate the moments. Appreciate the breeze. Appreciate the trees. Appreciate the quiet comfort of familiarity.
All of you…
…I believe in you. I believe in all of you. You are all doing good. You are surviving, and I believe that great things lie ahead of you.
Take care. Make up a Muffuletta. Eat it well.
Today…
What’s the funniest thing you heard in a movie theater?
My wife and I went to see the war movie “Saving Private Ryan” in IMAX…. it was super loud. My wife had even taken hearing protection, because it was so darn loud. When the movie ended she was taking out her ear plugs and said..
“Wow, that was so loud”
Now, there was an old dude sitting in front of us, and he said …
“yeah, I was there and it wasn’t THAT loud.”
Why do rich people work even after they become rich? Why don’t they play?
They do.
It’s a game for them.
When Warren Buffet gets an extra billion, it has no impact at all on his well-being.
It’s just like collecting points in a video game, chasing a high score.
It’s not a means to an end, but a goal in itself.
You are playing Minecraft, and setting up swimming pools with no exit in the sims.
They are gambling on stock markets, and offshoring jobs.
Setting up pet projects, like going to mars.
You buy a new T-shirt or shoes to improve your image, they buy a new media company.
You get a new car to save on gas, they buy up their competitors to increase profits.
It’s all a big game to some people. They are far removed from the consequences of their actions, and only focused on their score.
Contestant number one
Have you ever been mugged and had it end badly for the mugger?
I can’t say that it ended badly, but he was certainly disappointed.
It was in Philadelphia, in the mid-80s. He came out of an alley with a 3 or 4 inch pen knife to challenge me. “give me your money.”
I remembered something I had learned from a friend, and I decided to try my German on him.
I pulled out my pack of cigarettes, and asked him in German, “wollen Sie eine Zigarette?” (do you want a cigarette?)
“I want your money.” he answered.
“Ich verstehe sie nicht,“ (I don’t understand you) I replied.
He pulled some bills out of his pocket and pointed to me.
I pointed to myself, held out my hand and said, “für mich?” (for me?).
He turned around and headed back into the alley muttering, “fucking foreigners.”
Heart racing, and jubilant at my deception, I resumed my walk home.
What do you honestly think most Chinese really think of Koreans, and why?
Most of the time, Chinese don’t think about Koreans.
When I have heard Chinese talk about Koreans, they talk about good entertainment and food, hard work, and often more hot-tempered than Chinese. But they do not say this in an uncomplimentary way; they just say that Koreans are usually more hot-tempered and emotional than Chinese in a matter-of-fact way.
Not Fixable
What are some ways to make a boss regret firing you?
Simply put, by doing a good job, right up to the last day. Here’s my story.
I wasn’t fired, but I was forced out. Over 17 years, I worked diligently for my boss. I started out as a laborer in this construction firm. I had completed a 2 year course on building construction, but back then, you did not get a degree for vocational education. I worked my way up to running jobs for him, as a job supervisor. Building one job, I set a record within the firm for the highest profit job. The boss that’s because he bid the job right. At the same time, we had 2 other identical jobs going, and they were both losing money. I replied that I made sure he managed to keep that money instead of running it poorly.
Fast forward a few years, and over the years, we had both grown tired of each other. Little things. The boss visibly checking his watch when I leave at 3:31, a minute after quitting, all the while ignoring I started 10 minutes early. For some reason, he tells me I can not run jobs for him anymore, claiming that the jobs he bids on, they want to see that his supervisors have a college degree. I’ll keep my pay and vacation, but I am maxed out as a carpenter, so don’t expect raise for the near future.
At first, this arrangement was actually quite nice. I kept my pay and benefits, but the stress levels associated with running a job went away. All of the newly hired college degreed supervisors love having me on their job. After 17 years, I knew what needed doing and how to do it, and was happy to do so. That Christmas, I specifically not invited to the company Christmas party, as only supervisors were invited. It used to be everyone when we had a small crew, or supervisors and key personnel (Long term hires, not the guy hired last week).
Later that spring, the boss tells everyone that times are tough, he won the bid on the job, but it was low, I need everyone to take a pay cut. Everyone else agrees to take a dollar cut. My turn in his office, he suggests a $3.00 cut in pay. I tell him I can not afford that, I’ll need to immediately start looking for a job. He replies, okay a dollar cut. And says that if everyone pulls together and produces, I can raise their pay back. So… my pay depends on all the now demoralized employees.
So, of course after a few more months, I am feeling hurt by the disrespect, and a job is offered to me, same pay, new company, one with some real character and class. I took the job, of course. The boss looks at me and says, you didn’t think that pay cut was permanent did you? I just looked at him. Two weeks later, I am working the next job and loving the working relationship.
After a couple months, I get a call from him, he tells me it was a mistake to let me go, he didn’t realize all I did for him and how well I did it, offers me a good paycheck and restoration of all benefits, etc… I reply that this job has different challenges that I want to prove myself on, and politely declined. His response, oh well, nothing ventured, nothing gained. A few months later, I receive a similar call from him, and it goes the same way, though he offers me a little more money. Again, politely declined. 2 years or so after leaving, I see a prominent ad in the help wanted section. He placed an ad in my new locale, describing my experience and capability to the letter, offering a company truck, commensurate pay, etc.. I did not respond. After 17 years of the little quibbles we had with each other, I had enough. I currently had a secure job and wanted to stay there.
TLDR, do a great job right up to your last day and make them regret making you leave.
Respect in China
What true love story do you know?
Christopher Reeve was so much more than the characters he played.
He was exceptional, having hit the genetic lottery.
He was a brilliant student and an outstanding athlete. He was kind and oozed work ethic, pursuing perfection in everything he did. Christopher Reeve could have done anything he wanted in life.
Acting became his first and foremost love. He landed lead roles in nearly every audition from grade school onward.
A famous actress, Olympia Dukakis, approached him after a childhood performance, saying, “I am surprised. You’ve got a lot of talent. Don’t mess it up.”
He later frequented the most esteemed theater groups, including the Harvard Theater Company.
After being accepted to a list of Ivy League Schools, Chris attended Cornell, and later — Julliard.
He was adored by his theater teacher, John Houseman, who was eager to see Chris’s career blossom, saying, “Mr. Reeve. It is terribly important that you become a serious classical actor. Unless they offer you a shitload of money to do something else.”
The latter phrase came to be
After a stint of leading roles on Broadway, Chris landed the lead role in Superman in 1978. He went on to worldwide fame, appearing in famous films throughout the 1980s.
Chris lived a life most men dream of.
He made millions of dollars while starring in love scenes with beautiful starlets. He traveled the world, dining with Hollywood elites and noble laureates.
And then he met Dana
It was 1987. Dana Morosini was performing in a small-town cabaret.
Chris was always a fan of theater and was in attendance. Afterward, he walked into the backroom to meet her.
She’d fully expected to meet an arrogant jerk, as one often assumes of men in his position.
She said, “The man I met was soft-spoken, tall, kind, articulate, and not far removed from superman’s alter ego, Clark Kent.”
She was caught off guard by his interest in her. Chris said he’d just come back to compliment her, but later admitted he’d fallen in love with her in the moment he’d seen her.
She was initially skeptical, knowing it could all be a ruse to get her into the sack.
He later called her and she agreed to go out with him. She quickly fell in love and their relationship progressed. They moved in and lived together for several years. Then they married and had a child.
Theirs was always a good marriage, not prone to turbulence and strife and the two were known for their public affection. They traveled and went sailing while pursuing their own careers.
Eventually, horses came into the picture. Dana had grown up riding. In an effort to be part of that passion, Chris began taking lessons.
Like most things he did, he went all in. He wanted to be his absolute best. He rode and took lessons 4–5 days a week.
He went into jumping — a very dangerous style of horseback riding and was doing fine, despite taking an ambitious progression in the sport. It typically takes years to progress into big jumps.
May 27th, 1995
The most dangerous accidents are often subtle and less violent than a kick or explosion.
Gravity can do great damage with a little distance and a bad angle.
As Chris’s horse surged towards a wall to jump, it panicked and stopped, (called “refusing” in riding).
Chris was launched over the horse. He landed headfirst, all 6’4, 230 lbs of him. His second and third vertebrae in his neck were shattered.
Seven months prior, he’d filmed a movie where he played a paraplegic. He’d spent substantial time around people with spinal cord injuries in preparation for that role. Every day, he’d left their clinic feeling grateful for not living in their predicament.
And now he was there.
Life sputters to restart
Chris laid in the hospital, completely immobile and powerless. He was waiting to have surgery to reattach his skull to his spine. He couldn’t even lift his hand to brush his own teeth.
Most don’t realize what nearly happened in the weeks that followed.
Chris was in heated arguments with his doctors. He insisted they pull the plug on his breathing machine. It wasn’t a bluff. He couldn’t fathom living in his current state.
He saw himself as a burden to those around him. He was also threatening that he’d kill himself if they didn’t.
One can imagine, after a life of such freedom, being able to do anything you wanted, with a budget to pursue any passion, just how challenging it would be to suddenly be confined to such a cruel fate.
Dana Reeve became emotional and sat with him, saying, “I am only going to say this once. I will support whatever you want to do because this is your life and your decision. But I want you to know that I’ll be with you for the long haul, no matter what. You’re still you. And I love you.”¹
She urged him to just give it two years before they revisited the decision.
He accepted.
He eventually settled into his new life and Dana stood by her words, and by his side. They still lived, did things together, and found ways to have fun.
They were brought together by a push to make the world better for people like him, starting The Reeve Foundation, and raising money for people with spinal cord injuries.
He said during an Oprah interview: “We (humans) are all one big family. This has taught me a big lesson about complacency. We should never walk by someone in a wheelchair and be afraid of them — or think of them as a stranger. That could be us. In fact, it is us.”
Yet, it almost ended in that hospital room.
Chris couldn’t move a single body part below his neck. It was a far cry from his days as a free-roaming bachelor.
Yet he and Dana’s marriage was as strong in the second half as it had ever been before.
Sadly, Chris lost his life in 2004, due to complications from his injury. Shockingly, and only two years later, his wife Dana passed away from lung cancer. She was 47 years old and had never smoked.
Their story is terribly tragic. But within all of that pain, their love was consistent and they were happier than many others. It is yet another reminder, to embrace the moment and the blessing of good health.
Rest in peace.
Talking about Drugs
What are the implications of the U.S. ramping up export restrictions on key semiconductors and tools to China?
The US government will destroy America’s semiconductor sector. Nvidia is the poster child of this event. It’s GPU semiconductors used in AI and cloud computing applications are a good example. At first, the US government stopped sales to the Chinese market of its 100 series chips, then Nvidia began a slower version in its 800 series chips. Now all Nvidia GPU chips are off limits to China. Not only that, but 21 countries suspected of reselling their purchases to China have been put on the entity list.
Talk about killing a company, Nvidia is a prime example of what is happening in the US semiconductor sector. The US is hell bent on denying semiconductors to the world’s biggest semiconductor market regardless of the damage.
Both TSMC and Intel have stopped work on their high end fabs because that market is fading away from them because of US restrictions. Intel and Qualcomm have established ‘innovation centers’ in mainland China and TSMC is trying to expand its Nanjing factory.
The US government is killing the very sector it thought its actions was meant to kill the Chinese semiconductor rise, only to find it is killing its own semiconductor industry.
Stories
When were you hilariously wrong about something?
The night I let the wrong cat in.
When I was four, my father brought home this little white puppy for my sister. About a year and a half later, my mother got an orange tiger that became my cat. I loved that cat, and the cat and dog became fast friends, sleeping in the same bed together at times, and generally being the best of friends.
Starting in about fifth grade, I began to get really interested in retro TV shows like the Honeymmooners and Burns and Allen, and so many weekend nights I would fall asleep on the couch to those shows, either not going upstairs to my actual bed at all, or going to bed in the mmiddle of the night, at about three or four in the morning. Often enough I would let my cat in after he was outside for a few hours, as almost everybody who had cats at that time did; this was in the mid-seventies. He would make a kind of soft murr as he came in the door, and that’s how I knew he was in. That little white dog would be hanging out at his usual spot near the kitchen stove where his basket was, and the house would be at peace.
One cold winter night in February, when I was twelve, I got up to let my cat in. As usual, he did his usual murr, and I closed the door. Only this time the dog started growling and barking. Then I heard the sounds of a cat hissing. Then I heard the dog barking, and the noises of a cat and dog fighting. I couldn’t believe my ears because nothing like this had ever happened before. My cat and my sister’s dog were great friends so why was this happening? I was starting to realize that something was very, very wrong, and that there was probably a cat in our house that simply didn’t belong there. What else could explain the dog’s weird behavior? And by the way, what the hell was I gunna do now?
Well, what else could I do? I went upstairs to my parents room, opened the door and said:
“Ma? I think I let the wrong cat in.” See, I had figured out by this time that this other cat had followed mine into our house.
At that point, she and my brother came downstairs to see what was happening. As it turned out, quite a lot was going on because this cat and our dog were still fighting. And now my mother and brother were trying to get the damned cat out of the house. The cat was shrieking and hissing, flying around the kitchen, the dog was barking, and my mother couldn’t get her hands on the animal. My mother screamed at one point because the cat, quiet for a few seconds because it had tried to hide itself in a corner where we were storing insulation because my father was rebuilding our kitchen, screeched like a banshee when the cat sprung from his hiding place and attacked her.
Finally my cat, who had been paying no mind and eating his food in his bowl, finally got pissed off at the other cat and chased him out of the house. Then all was finally quiet, and we three all went upstairs to bed.
Meantime, my father, who was upstairs while all this was going on, got up to go to the bathroom, and he just started laughing his ass off. “It’s not funny!” I kept saying from my room, because by this time I was now in bed, and it was probably about 3:30 or 4:00 in the morning. Of course, the more I said it, the more he laughed, and the more he laughed, the more I found it funny, so I started laughing.
Just one of those classic stories from my childhood. And I can still hear my father remembering that story and repeating my words in the exact sheepish tone I used that night:
“Ma, I think I let the wrong cat in.”
Music
Can you think of an embarrassing moment that later made you proud?
There was the time I helped a teenage girl run away from home. I hid her in my room, lied to my parents, and ditched school. And for years I was completely embarassed by it. That just wasn’t appropriate behavior.
Here’s the story. When I was about 17, I started dating this girl who was a year younger than me. She complained about her mom a lot. Hey, we were teenagers, we all complained about our parents — but as I listened to her, it started to sound like there was some real emotional abuse going on. One night she called me, and we talked for hours. At one point her cat came in; he was a bloody mess, apparently he’d been in a fight, and for her this was the last straw. She was in quite an emotional state as she cleaned up her cat and then told me, “I’m coming over. I need to be with you tonight.”
It was 2 AM and I knew my parents would not appreciate a girl showing up at our house at two o’clock in the morning. I told her no, but she insisted. She said she was going to ride her bike over and that was it, goodbye.
What could I do? I didn’t want her ringing the doorbell, so I went downstairs and checked on my parents — they slept on the first floor, my room was upstairs. They were sound asleep, so I eased the back door open quietly and waited for her.
She showed up, dropped her bike in the back yard, and headed for the door. Before I stopped her, she threw the door open . . . and the dog started barking.
Oh crap, I’d forgotten about the dog. I shoved her up the stairs and followed her up, telling her, “stay up here and BE QUIET!”
Then I came downstairs, just as if I had been awakened by the barking and was trying to figure out what was going on. My parents were stumbling out of bed also. My mom noticed the back door was open and there was a bicycle in the yard. Obviously, someone had broken into the house — but where was the intruder? Dad headed to check the garage and I offered to check upstairs. Naturally, none of us reported finding an intruder, and they assumed that the intruder had been frightened by the dog and fled on foot. Mom brought the bike into the garage and was going to call the police — but I said “If we call the police they won’t be here for another hour and we’re all tired. Why don’t we call them in the morning?” They agreed that this was the best idea and they went back to bed.
Upstairs, girlfriend was crying. She was trapped, couldn’t go back downstairs for fear of the dog barking again. Couldn’t get her bike out of the garage without my parents noticing. I said “You’ll just have to stay here till morning.”
“My mom will kill me!”
At this point I said. “You’ve been telling me how much you hate your mom and how you’d really like to run away. Now’s your chance.”
“Huh?”
“Stay here tonight, and tomorrow we’ll see what your legal rights are.” She agreed and we fell asleep.
The next morning I came down for breakfast. Naturally, my parents were still talking about the incident in the night. I volunteered to call the police. I picked up the phone, dialed Time and Temperature, and listened to the National Weather Service’s local weather forecast while making up an entire imaginary conversation with the police department. I told my parents, “They said they’ll be here in an hour or an hour and a half. Why don’t you guys go to work, I don’t have school till third period today anyway, I can talk to them when they get here.” They said I was a good, considerate son, and went off to work.
By the way — I don’t think I’d ever lied to my parents before. At least not since I was little. I was a terrible liar, and I don’t know how I was able to do it so convincingly, thinking on my feet with the pressure on. Of all the things in this story, lying to my parents is probably the thing I’m the most ashamed of.
They went to work and Jeannie came downstairs for breakfast. I called an adult friend, an attorney, and told him the situation. He said that if I really thought that there was abuse going on, that I should report it to the District Attorney. So I called the District Attorney’s office and made an appointment for Jeannie to meet with them that afternoon. We arranged to meet at school and I would drive her downtown, but at the moment she needed to get her bike out of my parent’s garage. She rode off to school and I would later tell my parents that the police impounded it.
When I got to school myself — late, I’d lied to my parents about not having to go to first or second period that day — I was met in the hallway by my English teacher, Mr. Nelson. His first words weren’t rebuke or admonishment. Instead he said, “You’ve been seeing Jeanne M—-, haven’t you?” Cautiously I admitted it, and he said with near-frantic concern. “Do you have any idea where she is? Her mom thinks she’s been kidnapped, there was blood in the bathroom and she’s missing.”
Blood? Oh, yeah, the cat was bleeding when he came home that night and Jeannie cleaned him up. So I told Mr. Nelson that Jeannie had been with me, and he said Jeannie’s mother was on the way and I needed to go to the principal’s office to straighten things out.
When I got to the principal’s office several things happened all at once. The principal greeted me (I was kind of a teacher’s pet, and he insisted I wasn’t in any trouble). Jeanne just arrived on her bicycle and was coming down the hall from the other direction — and in the front door was walking Jeannie’s mom.
Jeanne gave me a hug, right in front of the principal, saw her mom, and panicked. “Oh My God, Run!” she yelled, grabbed me by the hand, and started running like she was trying to save her life. I followed as best as I could, and behind us, her mother was keeping up with us, cursing and making dire threats against us.
We went down a couple of back corridors of the school and into the student parking lot. We got into my car and peeled rubber getting out of there, leaving Jeannie’s mom out of breath and swearing.
We spent the next hour driving around, hiding from Jeannie’s mom or anyone else looking for us, then went downtown where we told someone from the District Attorney’s Office what was going on. They asked Jeannie to go in for further questioning and evaluation and told me to go back to school.
I went directly to the principal’s office. I told the principal about Jeannie’s claims of abuse — he didn’t act surprised — and that I’d dropped her off at the District Attorney’s office. He just told me to go to class and I never got into any trouble for what I did, not even for missing several classes that day.
Jeanne called me that night to tell me she’d been put in foster care and had been placed with a family that lived in the East High district so she’d still be going to school, and the DA was investigating the situation. But I never did find out how it all worked out, because not too long afterward, Jeannie and I had a big fight and we broke up.
In the years that followed, I was ashamed of the role I’d played in the whole affair. I was a good student, not a troublemaker, the teachers and parents all liked me, I was a Christian kid, active in church and my youth group, not the kind of person to help minors run away from home or hide girls in my room or lie to my parents. As the years went by I was ashamed and embarrassed by the whole thing and didn’t talk about it.
Then one day, 40 years later, I started wondering about some of the people I knew in high school and started looking them up on social media. I found Jeanne. Since I’d known her she’d become a registered nurse, gotten married, had a kid, gotten divorced, and lived alone with a couple of cats. Nothing too extraordinary there.
Then I found a blog post she wrote, entitled “The Day My Life Changed.” She wrote about years of emotional abuse recieved from her angry single mother, the cursing and threats and insults. “You’re nothing but a worthless slut,” she was told over and over, and ever since she was little she just wanted to make the abuse end. She wanted to run away — but was never able to do it “until one night a brave boyfriend said he’d help.” She ran away, got into foster care, and a family that convinced her that she wasn’t worthless after all — decided to go to nursing school and make a life for herself.
“Brave boyfriend.” I’d never thought of myself like that before. For years, I’d been ashamed and embarrassed about what I d done, only to find out that I was the hero in someone else’s story.
Yes I contacted Jean after that, and we stay in touch by Facebook.
Cajun Cheeseburger
Yield: 4 servings
Ingredients
- 1/2 pound ground beef
- 1/2 pound ground pork
- 2 tablespoons onion, finely chopped
- 2 tablespoons green pepper, chopped
- 1/2 teaspoon dried, crushed basil
- 1/2 to 3/4 teaspoon ground red pepper
- 1/2 teaspoon salt
- 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
- 4 slices Wisconsin Cheddar cheese
- 4 hamburger buns, toasted
- 4 tomato slices
- 1/4 cup green onion slices
Instructions
- Combine beef, pork, chopped onion, green pepper and seasonings; mix well. Shape into four patties. Cook and top with cheddar as directed below.
- Place patties on oiled grill over medium coals (coals will be glowing). Grill, uncovered, for 5 minutes on each side to desired doneness.
- Top each with Cheddar; continue grilling until cheese is melted. Place each patty on bun. Top with tomato; sprinkle with green onion.
Tell Me
What are the reasons behind the Chinese government’s willingness to help African countries?
I think it is inappropriate to say “China helps African countries”.
I have many business partners in China who are very interested when it comes to Africa. For the Chinese, Africa is a friendly business partner. Rather than “a beggar in need.”
There is a story circulating among the Chinese.
An Italian salesman went to Africa to sell shoes and found that Africans did not wear shoes at all. He returned to his country depressed and told his boss: “Boss, they can’t afford shoes at all. So our shoes can’t be sold.”
A Chinese salesman went to Africa to sell shoes and found that Africans did not wear shoes at all. He returned to his country excitedly and told his boss: “Boss, they don’t have shoes. Africa has huge market potential!”
Maybe you think that Africans can’t afford Chinese shoes, and that the Chinese are just being crazy. But the Chinese don’t think so.
There is a Chinese proverb, “Don’t bully a young man into being poor.” It roughly means: Don’t despise a person just because he is poor, but see his future.
In the eyes of the Chinese, although Africa is poor, it has huge potential. It doesn’t matter if you can’t afford shoes, I know rubber is abundant here. You can make soles out of rubber and sell them to me, and I will use them to produce shoes. Now that you have earned money, can’t you buy my shoes? You guys get nice shoes, I get cheap rubber, everyone is happy, isn’t that good?
What? You can only get rubber juice and don’t know how to make soles? It doesn’t matter, how about building a rubber factory and a shoe sole factory? No funds? Not technical?
It doesn’t matter, just wait for me to make a call.
Soon, rubber experts, equipment suppliers, and sole designers from China arrived. Chinese bankers came too, and they even gave better loans than the IMF, with only factories and future profits as collateral.
A year later, a modern rubber factory was built. Millions of shoe soles, gloves, and even tires are produced every year. Thousands of people found jobs here, and they began to have money to buy food, new clothes, and new shoes.
Salesmen in China found that their shoes were in short supply and all the shoes were sold. And the Italian salesman was still thinking about why Africans couldn’t afford shoes.
in this whole game
1. Africans got a modern factory.
2. Thousands of Africans around have received job opportunities. They have all made money, acquired new skills, and their lives have improved.
3. The tax revenue of the local government has been greatly increased. The income from selling rubber products is ten times more than that from selling rubber juice. There began to be money to build roads, schools, and hospitals.
4. China’s investment banks received dividends from the factory.
5. Chinese equipment suppliers sold equipment.
6. Experts who go to Africa to teach technology are paid a lot of money.
7. All the salesman’s shoes have been sold.
Who loses? There are no losers here
Is China helping Africa? No, China is just doing business their way, and Africans are just their customers. They deal fairly with each other and do not need charity or mercy.
Only some Western media are shouting: “Oh no! The Chinese are plundering Africa’s rubber. This is neocolonialism!”
They have completely forgotten how they did it 100 years ago.
Demigender
Is there anything that Canadian people hate about America and Americans?
- Americans have a tendency to talk with their “outside voice”, even when inside and in a place where quiet is expected.
- Americans have a tendency to mistreat people like store clerks, fast food workers, and hotel clerks.
- Americans appear to have a perverse sense of pride about (1) how little they know about Canada (2) what they think they know about Canada that’s absolutely wrong, and (3) how large Canada is. Americans tend to treat Canada as if it were the size of Rhode Island rather than it being a little larger than their own country.
- Americans are sure all their stuff is better than all our stuff, and when you point out how wrong that is in any area and provide demonstrable proof, they still won’t believe it.
- Americans call our currency “funny money” because it’s plastic and all the bills have different colours. That’s despite the fact that American counterfeit currency is quite common and Canadian counterfeit currency is pretty rare solely because of its design.
Girl and guy standards
If you could give one piece of advice to every teenager in the world, what would it be?
A few months ago, I received an email from my daughter’s school informing me about the tragic passing of a girl. She had taken her own life.
She was only 14! She should have had her whole life ahead of her to do anything she wanted, but she couldn’t anymore because she chose death. The school email didn’t provide details about the reasons behind her action, but through the conversation with my daughter, I discovered that she had been battling depression. She felt overwhelmed by how she looked and the hurtful comments some other kids made about her. Sadly, some of her peers even viewed her actions as brave.
While I felt so sorry for the girl and her family, I felt compelled to remind my daughter a lesson I had always emphasized: “Everything can be fixed, except death. Taking your own life is not an act of bravery. Why? Because dying is easy. Living is hard. You only die just once but you have to live every day.”
I told my daughter, if anyone ever hurt you, do not hurt yourself, just come home to me, I will make you dinner, we will have dinner together, and if necessary, we will go out there and hunt the enemy that hurt you together.
Teenagers, please remember: Everything, every mistakes can be fixed, except death. If you ever don’t know where to go, go home!
And parents, please please, tell your kids that they can talk to you about anything, they can always come HOME. Please don’t assume that they know. Just tell them, by words, sincerely.
Traditional woman
What is the best, least expensive gift you’ve ever received?
Some background: I was a costume designer for many years. My life was all about color. I dated someone who didn’t have basic color knowledge. Most frustratingly, he didn’t know common color names: Magenta, aqua, salmon lemon yellow. Could have been Greek to him. It was a source of humor between us, like we were speaking different languages.
Call him Steve.
One day we were discussing how and when we had learned color names, and had a bizarre revelation. I realized I had learned all my basic color names from Crayola crayons (note for young Quorans: they used to have the traditional color names, instead of creative new names). I started asking my friends, and all of them said that yes, the Crayola 64 pack (or was it a 120 pack? The biggest one.) was where they first learned their basic colors.
Steve, it turned out, never had Crayolas. His parents only got him the little 8 packs of generic colors. Red, green, blue, yellow, brown, orange, black, purple.
My poor disadvantaged baby! Of course we started making up for lost time. He would ask me what color I called something, then he’d tell me what he thought it was. Like lovers from foreign countries learning each other’s languages.
Anyway…. Came my birthday, and he gave me a gift I will never forget. It was a little book he had made by stapling sheets of paper together down the middle. On the cover it said “Crayola-Steve Dictionary” Inside, on each page, were two columns. One had each of the crayola colors drawn on the paper, with its name. Opposite it was the color that Steve had grown up thinking that name referred to.
I have never in my life had someone put so much effort and caring into a gift.
Years later, when Crayola betrayed the artists of the world by changing their color names to updated and exciting things, so that kids could no longer learn their color basics from the product, he hunted down a pack of the originals for me.
He was a very special guy, and I will always remember that gift fondly.
ADDED: For those who are interested, here you can see the change in color names in 1990…art teachers, I warn you, have a stiff drink in hand…
History of Crayola crayons – Wikipedia
What has an employee said that immediately caused you to fire them?
When I walked up on an employee berating a very nice regular customer. Actually, called this sweet little old lady a very offensive name (you f’king ole b***h). Her offence? She asked him a question as he was stocking some items. I fired him right there on the spot in front of her. Told him to get his things and get out and I would be mailing him his last paycheck as I never wanted to see his face again.
What is this problem with people painting cats blue?
What did you say to your boss that made them quit their job?
I said, “Pssst! Dave! C’mere! I got us new jobs!”
I was fed up with the crap at a place that I was working and interviewed for a job that was opening up at a new place. My boss had been driving 50 miles each way. The new company was opening a place down the highway from his house, cutting it to 12 miles. They offered more money, more decency, better products and overall better working conditions. When I interviewed, they hired me on the spot and asked if I knew of anyone else who would like to work for them that they could talk to. I set up interviews for my whole team before I even told them about it, then badgered them into going. I told them they could say no at any point and I’d never say that they interviewed at all. We all went. We got better jobs closer to our homes. We got better working conditions. We got more money.
Is the principle plank or statement of the Republican Party to cut taxes for the wealthy in the USA?
Once upon a time in a far away place, there was a party called the Republican party that believed in fiscal restraint and cutting taxes as the way to win the hearts and minds of the American people and to transfer ever more wealth to the rich in America.
This policy was ingrained and enshrined in their thinking with the greatest avatar being the B grade actor Ronald Reagan. Reagan coined phrases like Morning in America and went around Washington having huge balls and a wonderful time. Jobs started to disappear and the Midwest became the ‘rust belt’ but Reagan slashed taxes for the rich, ran up the deficit and left it for Bush Sr to fix it which he could not as he was right when he called it, ‘voodoo economics’.
This let in Bill Clinton who worked with Newt of Gingrich fame and they balanced the budget and all was well as the country bled ever more jobs but it was don’t worry be happy. Remember that one?
But Bush Jr of hanging chad fame, became President, cut more taxes, had 2 wars at a trillion $ or so and the country was back on the debt cycle as 3 million more jobs went to China. The ‘oughts’ were the worst for the American worker and best for American rich in a century until it all collapsed in a big heap.
Bush left the US in the Great Recession, crashed the economy and left it to neophyte Obama to fix. Obama dawdled along, saved the auto industry and put through an expensive healthcare plan nicknamed Obamacare and after 8 years and the hubris of HRC another Republican, this time a 5 time bankrupt tv huckster, Donald Trump came in with the same old same old.
Cut more taxes but then he decided he didn’t care about budgets. Thus the story ended with yet another $7 trillion added in debt as every Republican President that was a tax hawk / cutter has added more and more trillions to the national debt.
Trump did something else and is the reason for this story, he ended the Republican party. It no longer is a governing party, it is now the party of the angry disaffected types who will vote for him even though he admits he lost the 2020 election and tried to steal it. They love it, his minions now run the House, the Speaker was a leader in the steal the election saga.
A Christian theocracy is now spoken of openly and history is being rewritten by the GOP to move the US to a religious based society run by evangelical GOP Christians where women have no rights any more and elimination of LGBTQ rights including the right to marry will be taken away.
The GOP no longer stands for cutting taxes for the rich, that has already been done. Now they want to destroy and dismantle the federal government and take rights away from those they do not like including black and brown people who are being gerrymandered out in state after red state.
To cut the power of the feds and give it to the states so that the states will devour each other in a free for all. The GOP no longer stands for anything other than chaos.
You don’t have to look far, the new Speaker’s first proposal for Israel was to partially defund the IRS so that the rich don’t have to worry about being audited.
In the end, the GOP now stands for chaos, tearing down the system, cutting taxes and screwing everyone including the military and making themselves the white masters of an evangelical Christian society where they have all the rights and will tell you what to read, what to think and what history will be taught.
In short, they stand for nothing but themselves.
Can married men have close female friendships outside of the marriage?
I dunno, should they?
I’ve heard men say the only reason they ever befriend a woman is because they want to get their dicks wet. I believe those men. They have no reason to lie, and I see no evidence that runs counter to what they say.
Those men? No, they probably should not. Not just because they’ll cheat if they can, but because they see women as basically a life support system for a vagina, and what kind of friend is that? Their friendship will always and forever be transactional, because at the end of the day they don’t see women as people.
Normal men? Yes, normal men should have friends outside their marriage. Including friends who are women.
Who is the worst customer you have ever had?
We had to ban Karen from our store.
Karen attempted to manipulate Domino’s refund policy, time and time again.
Ultimately, we were losing money because of her.
She liked to place pizza orders online quite frequently.
And would then decide to request a refund for whatever reason, be it from the order was messed up to ‘the pizza just doesn’t look that great’.
Yes, she actually said that to me.
It got to the point where we would ensure her order was immaculate.
Quality over quantity, eh?
And guess what? She’d try and get a refund.
Naturally, she’d get one, since there’s the whole thing about how the “customer is always right”.
We attempted to logically defend ourselves, telling her we did nothing wrong, but she ensured to find something flawed with her order.
Eventually, we got sick of it, and so we called in our district manager.
She places an order, and I crafted damn near the best pizza the world has ever seen. Even my manager agreed, so it’s legit.
Everything else associated with Karen’s order was on point.
So about 5 minutes or so after the driver returns from her house, we receive a call from Karen.
“Hi, I’d like a refund for my order.”
I notify my manager it’s a no go.
“Don’t refund her.”, my manager said.
“Ban her.”, my district manager said.
It’s about time.
Have you ever accidentally ordered something at a restaurant that was significantly more expensive than you expected it to be? What was the end result?
Yes. Out for dinner with my wife, I ordered a budget-friendly red called Leaping Horse or something similar. Or, more accurately, that’s what I meant to order. Instead, I treated us to a $200 bottle of Stag’s Leap at five times the price of the other horsey brand I thought I ordered. Stag’s Leap wasn’t even on the official wine list.
To be fair, the server questioned it and double checked that was what I wanted. Each time I foolishly said yes.
Expensive lesson but it was a beautiful wine.
The real red pill
How does the US Navy minimize the discomfort of crew members on modern destroyers during heavy seas?
The US Navy doesn’t try to minimize discomfort. Safety? Sure. Discomfort? Suck it up Shippy!.
Racks, Navy-speak for the bunks sailors sleep in, have straps. Typically we keep them tucked under the mattress. But when needed we can pull them out and snap hook the to the top of the rack frame. This prevents you from rolling out of your rack.
I have used the straps on a few occasions and they do in fact work well. During a trek from Norfolk to Pascagoula back in the mid-90’s aboard a Burke-class guided missile destroyer, we ran into a group of storms near Key West. This area is notorious for bad weather that pops up on short notice. The area is littered with wrecks from the Age of Sail all the way to the 20th Century. White Squalls in particular are some of the most dangerous and infamous. We happened upon what the Commanding Officer would later tell us the Coast Guard had determined was a White Squall. When it began I was actually on the bridge standing watch. We were taking heavy listing rolls and heaving up and down fairly steeply. There is a list gauge and pitch gauge on the bridge. The heaviest roll we noted was about 32 degrees which is fairly close to Burke-classes mast limit.
We posted garbage bags in passageway and at strategic points. Many guys got sick. I felt horrible but I didn’t throw up. That may have been because I simply couldn’t eat after it started. As I was leaving watch and heading to the Mess Decks for Mid-Rats or Midnight Rations, I could smell vomit. The hour or so beating we took while I was on watch had me dizzy and swaying. Even when the ship wasn’t rocking, I was. By the time I made it to eat everything was secured as ordered by the CO. At that moment the CO came over the 1MC (loudspeaker), which was a big deal because it was past TAPS and no announcements are normally made. “Everyone not on watch strap into your racks”. Engineering watch crew set about “Setting Condition YOLK” which closes a lot of doors on the ship along with ventilation. The gun mount was turn as far aft as possible and depressed (pointed down) as much as possible.
The next day it was very calm to start. Then all of the sudden a storm formed and hit quickly during dinner. The rolls approached 40 degrees. We nosed into one wave an it submerged the bow. The waves that hit the bridge smacked the windows hard enough that it broke several windshield wipers. The storm hit while dinner was being served. The salad bar, which was tack-welded to the deck broke free and sent the contents everywhere. At the time the boat deck and our complement of 2 RHIB boats were my assigned space and responsibility along with one of my comrades. Both of us had to go out on deck to make sure the boats were secured. That was fun. We got to the quarterdeck and an area in the open that we have to cross with nothing to hold on to. Just at we were crossing the open area the ship heeled an rocked heavy to starboard ( the boat deck is on starboard). We were standing straight up but looking straight down at the water. It was intense.
There is also a stanchion/wire system we can rig for the Focsle (bow). They screw into the deck and stand about 6 foot tall. Wearing a harness you can strap onto the wire. Although rigging it when the seas are already rough is problematic. You can also just take the top caps and screw them into the deck, attaching the wire.
What is the most savage revenge you’ve seen someone take on their ex?
Years ago, my then-GF had a friend who periodically hung out with us.
Her friend was in a fairly turbulent relationship with her boyfriend.
It wasn’t abusive or anything. It just wasn’t meant to be. They couldn’t agree on anything in life.
Honestly, I dreaded hanging out with them.
They typically were showing up when we were going out on the weekends.
I knew that when they drank, it only exacerbated their problems and they’d start arguing.
And look, I’m not knocking either of them for their dysfunction. They were both young, not in full control of their emotions. They definitely weren’t prepared for their own incompatibility.
These things happen. We live. We grow. We learn.
Eventually, he came to realize that they were stuck in a rut they would never get out of. He broke things off with her.
She did NOT take it well.
Within a couple weeks she had moved away.
She took something with her though – his child. She was pregnant and chose not to tell him. It was a savage, vindictive thing to do.
Years later, he found out through back channels about it.
He was rightfully pissed. And it turned into huge drama.
Some of the friends in our group knew about him having a daughter and didn’t say anything to him. (Thankfully I didn’t know.)
He had to take her to court to get access to his daughter. And he did get visitation rights eventually.
But it sucked. He’d missed 5 years of his daughter’s life and hadn’t met her until then.
I can’t imagine introducing myself to my 5-year-old daughter, but these things happen.
He and the mother found a way into an agreeable arrangement of co-parenting.
And, he found a way to bury his resentment towards her for the sake of the child, which couldn’t have been easy.
But it was a valuable sacrifice because in the end it benefited the most important person in the equation, his daughter.
But I hate seeing kids getting caught in these evil games adults play with each other.
No such thing as biological sex…
What will happen when I try to start a car that has been parked for 10 years?
Due to a wiring harness issue, my father parked his 1965 impala SS in the garage 2002 and there it sat until 2022 when we had to move it. Rather than calling a tow truck I figured what the hell l, let’s give it a shot. We put a battery in it, pumped the gas a few times, a lot and behold l, it started right up after 30 seconds of cranking. Granted it ran like crap but it did run and stayed running with 20 years old gas. At first I was shocked that the gas was still good. Then I realized that it was likely the fact that the gas was 20 years old that made it start fine. This gas was pre-ethanol.
Now all we need to do is finish the wiring harness replacement
Do you agree with “old enough to bleed, old enough to breed”?
No I don’t. I was 12 when I had my first set of twins. My father had raped me for almost 2 years, and I didn’t know about abortion then. I was a child who was forced into having sex, and procreate, against my will. I still managed to graduate early, and find a good man to love, but I’ll never be able to get that innocence or childhood back.
What is the most bizarre coincidence that has ever happened in your life?
On a beautiful summer day many years ago, my friend Cathy and I went to the beach.
After sunbathing and swimming, we had a picnic and took a nap.
Feeling refreshed after the nap, Cathy and I walked the full length of the beach.
This was in eastern Canada which is surrounded by the Atlantic Ocean.
By the time we got back to our picnic table, it was starting to get dark.
We packed our things and headed for the car.
When Cathy got the car keys out of her purse she dropped them in the sand.
It was nearly dark out, and we were the only people left at the beach.
There were no cell phones back then, and the nearest house was at least five miles away.
It was getting REALLY dark and we started to panic.
We searched with a little ‘purse’ flashlight to no avail.
Just as we were giving up hope of finding the keys, we saw a silhouette of a man walking toward us.
As he got closer, we realized that he had a metal detector!
He asked us what we were looking for, and moved the detector around the area where Cathy had dropped the keys.
‘Beep – beep – beep’. The keys were detected!
What were the odds of a man with a METAL DETECTOR coming along the beach just when we needed his help?
As we thanked him, he told us that coming to the beach to find hidden treasures was his hobby, and he had never stayed that late before.
We were all amazed at his perfect timing!
When might China use America’s deceptive tactics back on America?
When I was a kid, my mother told me a Chinese famous saying:
Avoid argue with a sinister.
无与小人论短长
It is like debating with a dog. If won,you’re more dog than a dog. If lose, you’re worse than a dog. If it’s a draw,you’re like a dog.
There’s no need, just keep going.
Why Do Men Get So Few Matches On Dating Apps?
I get the feeling that Russia, China, the Middle East, and maybe others have something planned to take out the USA. Any theories on what it might be?
You want the good news or the bad news. Let me feed you the good news first. Not yet! Chinese, Russian or a combination of this that faced the U.S. excesses hasn’t reached the point that it wants to take out the U.S. in spite of the U.S. provocation and goaded behaviour.
But it might if the U.S. don’t recognised the red line and push and push and push. At some point it may have no choice. And now the bad news. The U.S. has lost its ability to act without repercussions. Up to 2000 these countries might not have the capability to take out the U.S. but by 2023 they certainly can. And absolutely could do so it push comes to shove.
My worry is that the U.S. might not recognises or in denial that those nations can and will do it if they are push into the corner. There lies the risk of a catastrophic disaster first of the U.S. demise and or worst the U.S. nuclear respond and of course China and Russia respond to the U.S. nuclear response. It is a dooms day scenario for our world.
Have you ever been ignored by the staff in a store because you didn’t look wealthy enough?
Actually, I have a different answer to this.
When I first moved to Boston, I had zero money. I was 18, working for minimum wage, and supporting my own crappy little basement studio apartment which took half of my take-home pay every month. I saved up to shop at Goodwill.
Dressed in my best ragged torn-off shorts and a gingham halter top, I wandered into John Lewis, an expensive jeweller on Newbury Street. The smell alone told me I was out of my price range–there’s just a smell to really high-end stores.
I was bedazzled. No other word for it. They had totally gorgeous stuff in their showcases, and I lusted after every item. The clerk asked me quite cordially if she could show me something. I told her that I frankly couldn’t afford to breathe their air. Her response made a difference in my life.
She said that maybe I couldn’t afford their stuff now, but maybe one day I could. She showed me everything! She let me try on everything. To me, Macy’s was higher class than I felt I could enter, OK? An expensive Newbury Street merchant making me welcome? This was beyond belief!
They had a set of 18k gold jewelry, all custom-made, hand-carved in a strawberry pattern that I fell in love with.
Eventually I tore myself away, a dream planted in my heart. Twelve years later, when I actually had a little money, I bought a custom ring in that strawberry pattern from them. It cost about $2000, and after a couple of fittings I wore it continuously for 30 years.
If that lady, who knew for a fact that she couldn’t sell me anything that day, hadn’t been so wonderful, I’d never have entered that shop again. Her kindness made all the difference.
What do you think of China’s regulatory clampdown on business leaders in the country?
China don’t pander to millionaires and billionaires rogue and irresponsible business leaders who took advantage and hurt the Chinese people. US calls it too big to fail companies. China take them to task. The U.S. bailed them out using taxpayers money.
What do I think?
I think China is responsible, is doing the right thing, is making businessman think of serving their customers better. I think the U.S. should learn from China. That is what I think! What about you? What do you think?
Gave Cheating Wife a Taste of Her Own Medicine: She didn’t expect to see my revenge…
How is China going to gain trust when their government says a forceful takeover of Taiwan is inevitable and near? Are they really that deluded?
China will do whatever is necessary to the interest of China and the Chinese people and that include Taiwan, China. Taiwan is an island and a region of China. It is an unalienable part of China. It cannot be separated or snagged away from China by any means including the U.S. and western geopolitical games.
As a Chinese origin from the southern China where 90% of Taiwanese Chinese migrated from. I understand their psyche that most westerners who write such ridiculous question can ever understand. We want to see Taiwan as an integral part of China. Many Taiwanese are all out to support and help China achieved this honourable achievement.
Do we gives a shit about what white Caucasian westerners think or feel? Not at all. Not even bothered a bit. We care about keeping our nation together from the manipulative western behaviour. Forceful or peaceful it our god damn business. It is our Business not yours. Mind you own business.
When do Chinese people think their country will finally be as advanced as the west?
As Prof Zhang Weiwei likes to say, China is no longer on the same track as the West.
She’s now running on her own track.
This is like what I tell my medical students — don’t compete with others, just do the best that you can do (in your own way that works best for you).
Edit 17 October 2023:
As a Chinese, I see China as still being more deeply Confucianist than Communist; though there’s some overlap between the two ideologies. The sworn goals of a Confucianist society are two: xiaokang 小康 (moderate prosperity — which China has largely achieved), and finally datong 大同 (Great Unity
, a classical Chinese concept for an utopian view of the world; or Common Prosperity).
This is very different from the approach of the Western nations, seeking hegemony over other nations.
“The report to the 20th CPC National Congress in 2022 drew a great blueprint for rejuvenating the Chinese nation on all fronts by pioneering a uniquely Chinese path to modernization, and pointed out that striving to build a global community of shared future is one of the intrinsic requirements of Chinese modernization, affirming the close bond between the future of China and the future of all humanity.”
Whether you believe the report or not — just watch what China had been doing (in Asia, Middle East, Africa and South America), and is continuing to do in the coming years.
Edit 18 October 2023:
China is holding her Belt and Road Forum for International Cooperation (BRF) on 17–18 October 2023.
Attending the event are more than 1,200 representatives from more than 80 countries and regions
The list of VIP attendants is impressive, showing how China’s Belt and Road Initiative (2023 is its 10th anniversary) has attracted the attention of most countries (except those in US and her allies):
Vladimir Putin is top of the list.
Others: Indonesian President Joko Widodo,
Kazakh President Kassym-Jomart Tokayev,
Hungarian Prime Minister Viktor Orban,
Chilean President Gabriel Boric,
Serbian President Aleksandar Vucic,
Uzbek President Shavkat Mirziyoyev,
Ethiopian Prime Minister Abiy Ahmed
Papua New Guinean Prime Minister James Marape
UN Secretary-General António Guterres,
Argentine President Alberto Fernandez,
Vietnamese President Vo Van Thuong,
President of Mongolia Ukhnaa Khurelsukh
Prime Minister of Mozambique Adriano Maleiane
Pakistan’s Prime Minister Anwar-ul-Haq Kakar,
Thai Prime Minister Srettha Thavisin,
Kenyan President William Ruto,
Cambodian Prime Minister Hun Manet,
Lao President Thongloun Sisoulith,
Sri Lankan President Ranil Wickremesinghe
President of the Republic of the Congo Denis Sassou Nguesso
It looks like many other countries have been attracted by China’s parallel track, and are leaving “the American track”.
Alpha Hubby Allowed Me To Open My Marriage Then Filed For Divorce & Ghosted, Left Broke & Penniless
How low is the standard of living in Britain compared to the USA and Canada?
I’m a former New Yorker. I’ve only visited Canada, but lived in London for the past 25 years. In the States, if you have a good job, you can live very comfortably. But if you have a serious medical emergency or long term medical needs, this can bankrupt you, you can lose your home & be very poor. For average workers, the medical insurance is very difficult as the insurance is very expensive and on top of that, you have to co-pay. And many can’t get insurance because of pre-existing issues. In the UK, medical care is free, doesn’t matter about your past history … the taxes we pay towards it is less than what people pay in the States for their insurance. People never have to worry about being homeless because of ongoing medical problems. Whenever I go back to New York to visit, I’m a bit shocked at how very poor many people are there – compared to London.
In the UK, if you are working, but not able to afford rent, the government will pay towards your rent. It may not cover all the rent, but it helps. If you have children & don’t earn enough in your job, the government will top up your earnings so you are above the poverty line. If you are unemployed, your unemployment benefits won’t stop as long as you are actively looking for work & attending the skills meetings. And if you do accept a job, but it doesn’t pay well, the government will top it up to make sure you are earning what they consider to be the minimum needed to live on.
My high-earning son had the opportunity to work for his company in the States, but he realised he has a much better safety net here in the UK for his family. It felt too much of a risk for him to have to pay for medical insurance for his family when it isn’t even guaranteed that it will pay for certain things.
The only thing I don’t like about living in the UK is the weather. But everything else, in my personal opinion, leads for a better quality of life.
What was your “I am surrounded by idiots” moment?
So, I’m on the beach enjoying myself over a bit of beach calligraphy (this involves cutting sand out of the surface, and some fairly intense concentration) when the spell is broken by someone who has walked up to me, having walked over my work, stood on it at my side, and proceeded to ask me what I’m trying to catch.
The next time that happened to me I was ready with “Calligraphy” as my reply but then just dumbstruck again by being asked if I had permission.
EDIT
I just want to add the following in response to some of the comments I’ve had here:
I’ve NEVER had a child walk up to one of my doodles without noticing it and being curious about it. I do occasionally have young children deliberately tread through it but that’s part of being observant. It feels interesting underfoot. The interaction usually leads to my offering the tools to the kiddiewinks to try.
I can’t help wondering if there’s a relationship between stupidity and being unobservant. I’m not sure but it’s clear that coming with a strong preconception does get in the way of open observation and surprise. Only an adult can come blinded by so much preconception that they fail to notice the beach calligraphy happening before their eyes and under their feet. To then layer that blindness with a preoccupation with permission …?! I make no apologies for my disdain.
There are some lighting conditions under which the beach calligraphy is barely noticeable and almost impossible to photograph: high sun, lit from behind the observer, very cloudy. The beach calligraphy depends on shadow. I’m very keenly aware of this. Usually, under conditions like that, I’m just practising close to the waters’ edge where it is constantly washed away in any case.
If I have to do a paid commission then I get careful and a bit possessive about it and I look for a spot on a beach where I can be alone. I don’t usually mind redoing work. I often redo it in any case just because I’m not satisfied with the calligraphy.
You can lose your work to a wave, dogs, or an unobservant idiot but you don’t lose the skill you build in doing it again.
Some people have said things along the lines of “You don’t own the beach!” and I do (very rarely) get that response on the beach if I try to ward someone off my work. It’s a stupid response because this is not about ownership. Stupidity, on the other hand … if you’re not prepared to own it, it will own you.
What happened that made you walk out of the courtroom and think, “That did not just happen”?
I was in a courtroom trying to evict a tenant, I was broke had massive loans on the property and down on my luck, I could not afford legal representation so I represented myself which judges generally do not like. I saw the judge wipe the floor and throw out of court room the others who represented themselves earlier that day. This was the days before the internet and I had to learn about housing laws from things called books if you remember what they are? Then it was my turn to step into the dock after four hours of waiting in the court during previous, I learned a lot about tenancy laws in those four hours.
Preliminaries over then the game was on, its was like a verbal tennis match on points of law, I knew I had my paperwork and facts right, he volleyed and I hit it back countering his serve. Forgive me because this was over thirty years ago so I don’t remember the joust word for word, the judge did not like this uneducated smart arsed whippersnaper giving as good as-he got.
Then he threw a curve ball question regarding arrears, and how much the tenant owed, I said the tenant was six months behind I wasn’t sure of the amount as it was irrelevant, I had not come to court to claim arrears ( separate application and hearing and nigh on impossible to get money back because she was claiming benefits ) I said to the judge I just want her evicted and my property back. Then he tried to bamboozle me with jargon after jargon and I got a bit confused he then said to me said to me,
‘Young man I suggest you get your paper work in order and go and see legal advice!’
I was so nervous and that is exactly what I didn’t want the hear, as it meant I would have to have my property repossessed and I would have lost everything I worked for, I was sweating profusely my mind was over revving I was trying to grasp at something I had read in the past six months that would get me out of this painful situation
Then it came to me, I knew that I had done everything right and that he had to grant me a notice to evict, from deep within my memory I recalled something and blurted out to the judge, your honour under section ( blah ) article ( blah) of the 1988 housing act I have served you all the correct papers within procedure and you are obliged to give me notice of eviction, that was it, my final serve I had nothing else to give.
The court went silent and the court usher gave a wry smile, the Judge turned and looked down his nose through his half rimmed glasses at me and stared for a moment, then he turned to the court clerk and beckoned him over, he whispered something in his ear and the clerk disappeared for a moment and brought back one of the biggest books I’d ever seen laid it in front of the judge and opened it for him. The judge flicked through the pages and ran his finger down the lines of one or two pages as he was reading, he then grabbed the gavel looked at me and brought the gavel down with a thud and said
‘ Notice of eviction granted, 28 days’
It may not seem much, but there is nothing better (to me ) than beating the system that’s so inherently wrong and stacked against you but the biggest victory was correcting a judge on a point of law, when I left the court house I felt twenty kilos lighter and like had just been set free from , I did get my property back 28 days later
‘If you don’t fight you never win, if you fight there is a chance you may win’
Muffuletta Sandwiches
In New Orleans the two best Muffuletta Sandwiches — bar none — can be had at Central Grocery or at Napoleon House on Chartres Street.
Yield: 1 loaf bread; 1 to 4 servings, depending on appetite!
about 3 quarts olive salad
Ingredients
Muffuletta Bread
- 1 cup warm water (110 degrees F)
- 1 tablespoon granulated sugar
- 1 package active dry yeast (about 1 tablespoon)
- About 3 cups bread flour
- 1 1/2 teaspoons salt
- 2 tablespoons vegetable shortening
- Sesame seeds
Olive Salad
- 1 (32 ounce) jar pimento-stuffed green olives, chopped
- 2 cups pitted ripe olives, chopped
- 1 1/4 cups chopped pickled cocktail olives
- 2 celery stalks, finely chopped
- 2 cups blanched chopped cauliflower
- 1/4 cup minced garlic
- 2 medium carrots, peeled and minced
- 2 teaspoons dried leaf oregano
- 1 tablespoon minced flat-leaf parsley
- 2/3 cup red wine vinegar
- 1/4 cup olive oil
Muffuletta Sandwich
- 1 (10 inch) Muffuletta Bread loaf
- 3 ounces honey ham, thinly sliced
- 3 ounces Mortadella with pistachios, thinly sliced
- 3 ounces Genoa salami, very thinly sliced
- 1 heaping cup Olive Salad
- 5 slices Provolone cheese
Instructions
Muffuletta Bread
- In a 2 cup glass measuring cup, combine water and sugar.
- Stir in yeast. Let stand until foamy, 5 to 10 minutes.
- In a food processor fitted with the steel blade, combine 3 cups flour, salt and shortening. Add yeast mixture. Process until dough forms a ball, about 5 seconds. Stop machine; check consistency of dough. It should be smooth and satiny. If dough is too dry, add more warm water, 1 tablespoon at a time, processing just until blended. If dough is too sticky, add more flour, 1 or 2 tablespoons at a time, processing just until blended. Process for 20 seconds to knead.
- Lightly oil a large bowl, swirling to coat bottom and sides. Place dough in oiled bowl; turn to coat all sides. Cover bowl with plastic wrap. Let rise in a warm, draft-free place until doubled in bulk, about 1 1/2 hours.
- Lightly grease a baking sheet. When dough has doubled in bulk, punch down dough; turn out onto a lightly floured surface. Form dough into a round loaf about 10 inches in diameter; place on greased baking sheet. Sprinkle top of loaf with sesame seeds; press seeds gently into surface of loaf. Cover very loosely with plastic wrap; let rise until almost doubled in bulk, 1 hour.
- Place rack in center of oven. Heat oven to 425 degrees F. Remove plastic wrap.
- Bake loaf in center of preheated oven for 10 minutes.
- Reduce heat to 375 degrees F; bake for 25 minutes. The loaf is done when it sounds hollow when tapped on bottom. Cool completely on a rack before slicing.
Olive Salad
- Combine all ingredients in a large bowl and stir to blend well.
- Store in jars with tight-fitting lids in the refrigerator.
Muffuletta Sandwich
- Heat oven to 350 degrees F.
- Cut bread in half crosswise to form a sandwich bun. Layer the honey ham on the bottom of the loaf. Next add the Mortadella, then the salami. Spread the Olive Salad over the meats evenly. Top with the slices of Provolone cheese and place the top on the sandwich. Press down to compress slightly. Wrap the sandwich in foil and bake for 20 minutes, or until the cheese has begun to melt into the Olive Salad.
- Slice sandwich into 4 quarters. Use wooden picks to secure layers, if desired; remove picks before eating.
Notes
Not only can you use this Olive Salad as a dressing for a Muffuletta Sandwich, it also makes a delicious addition to tossed green salads, pizzas, and is a great relish to spread on crackers.